Let's just put some of the fucking life tree essence into these gems, what could possibly go wrong :^)

>Let's just put some of the fucking life tree essence into these gems, what could possibly go wrong :^)

Even more retarded than Sauron's ring desu

Other urls found in this thread:

e-reading.club/bookreader.php/138987/Tolkien_09_Sauron_Defeated.pdf
rollingstone.com/tv/news/george-r-r-martin-the-rolling-stone-interview-20140423
twitter.com/AnonBabble

It was a great idea. All the problems were caused by them being too great.

Fingolfin>Feanor

>Feanor creates the Silmarils
>Fingolfin cripples Satan
>Finarfin does...uh...I guess his kids were cool

No shit. This doesn't even need to be debated.

>One makes some faggy jewels and kills his kin
>One permanently wounds a fucking god

Balls of fucking steel

>be Feanor
>make the most beautiful gems ever in all of existence
>so beautiful Satan himself comes to steal them
>get mad, swear the most terrible oath that will ever be sworn in the history of the world
>former allies and friends are like "cool down bro, you're not thinking straight"
>kill them and steal their boats
>cross the ocean, get to the other side and burn the boats because this train has no brakes
>takes my entire people on a rampage all the way to the gates of Angband
>personally fight my way so deep into the enemy ranks I end up soloing nine Balrogs at once
>finally get struck down by Gothmog, lord of Balrogs
>my (many) children carry my dying body from the battlefield
>make them swear they nor their children nor their children's children will rest until we get those fucking gems
>set fire and blow away as ashes on the breeze as I die because of how FUCKING ANGRY I AM

MADMAN
A
D
M
A
N

Who do we cast to play him in his inevitable biopic?

Unknown.

No one fits his personality or carries the weight required.

>oaths

Can you imagine Jackson directing an obligatory trilogy for Silmarillion? It would be abominable.

I don't really get the comparisons to Martin either. Martin talking about how he's conversant with Tolkien is strange. Their works may be intertextual, but beyond that I think the chasm of modernity to post-modernity/contemporary creates a considerable difference. Does Martin even have a palpable creation mythology? Martin seems to be more concerned with eschatology than genesis.

How big was the biggest dragon Arda ever saw

DDW or


Idris Elba

They could maybe do some shit on Túrin, but for the most part it would be a disaster. Jackson lost his touch.

Also, the rights to make movies out of the silmarillion were bought like last year I think.

...

BIG

Ancalagon the Black crushed Mountains when he was killed.

Looks like about a mile wing span? Wasn't anca described as bigger than a mountain though?

Agreed. I have yet to see the third hobbit film for this reason

It's hard to watch.

Some scenes- the White Council fight with the Nazguls are good.

But it's soo over the top and not in a good way.

The first one was enough shit for me

I've heard it's just a literal anime tier, DBZ CGI action shit fest. It also messes up on continuity and has goofs...I wanted to like it so much, but the second one soured me on the trilogy

Muh Dwarf Feast/ food scenes.

Saw it whilst I was ill and it made my stomach hurt.

How was he kill then? Nuke?

Agreed...the 1977 animated hobbit is infinitely better. It preserves the musicality of the novel as well. It doesn't forget that it was YA/Juvenile fiction first. That's not a bad thing either. Some of the most beloved stories are ones written for children. I'm thinking of the Little Prince, but it's certainly debatable what audience that is for

Yeah. It's how I imagine anime is.
>Haven't watched anime.


I didn't go to the cinema for BOT5A because of DOS.

I hear ya. I don't watch much anime. I did when I was younger, but I've heard the action is beyond ridiculous even for a fantasy film

Hasn't this image been proven wrong multiple times?

Someone should do this but with character's penises

Left to your imagination.
Literally a sentence describes him.

It is. CGI is shit. Battle tactics is shit.
It's awful.

Elves leap over dwarves.

A Half Elf in a spaceship.

>Also, the rights to make movies out of the silmarillion were bought like last year I think.
No they fucking weren't. Christopher Tolkien ain't ever giving those away.

It probably is an exaggeration, but Ancalagon was described as being larger than mountains.

It exaggerates a lot. None of the dragon sizes in the Legendarium are outright stated or confirmed. Some believe they were actually quite small, some believe they were quite large. Personally I believe pic related is accurate.

Remember that it took all the birds of Middle Earth to take down the Dragons and Thorondor actually has a confirmed size.

the pic

If you call a fatty, as fat as a cow, that doesn't mean they are literally as big as a cow.

Didn't the Numenorians have machine guns and airplanes and shit?

>Stop believing the author

even that makes glaurung and up seen far too massive, when you consider glaurung was killed by a stab from a normal length sword, be like a pin prick at that scale.

Reading the wikipedia articles of the Tolkeinverse is more entertaining than anything Tolkein ever wrote. How can you make such a great universe, but present it in the most boring way possible?

>tfw a LOTR thread comes along when you need it.

Ok bros, here's the thing. I'm hosting a LOTR D&D game for some friends of mine set in the Kin-strife. Looks like not a ton has been written on it, so I'm able to have some leeway when it comes to writing. Can we talk about the kin-strife and how Eldacar and Castamir ruined everything?

I also wouldn't mind some what-if scenarios since my PCs want to play both sides of the conflict.

Yeah. I meant that the pic gives an accurate estimate of Ancalagon. I don't believe that Glaurung was larger than Smaug. But Túrin did use Gurthang, which seems to have some special abilities. Glaurung did also decimate the Elven/Men/Dwarven armies before the Dwarves fucked him up.

>I'll just go ahead and eat this glowing ball of fire this guy is holding, what could possibly go wrong?

Oh, silly Carcharoth.

>Númenórean alchemists discovered black powder while searching for the Elixir of Life; this accidental discovery led to experiments in the form of weapons such as bombs, grenades, incendiary fire arrows and rocket-propelled fire arrows during the reign of Ar-Pharazon. Development of incendiary weapons increased dramatically when Ar-Pharazôn was building his Great Armament with Sauron. Among many inventions were a timed grenade that flung out hundreds of metal shards upon explosion, and a machine capable of firing many arrows at once

>"Númenóreans spent much of their time contriving ships that should rise above the waters of the world and hold to the imagined seas. And these ships, flying, came also to the lands of the new world, and to the east of the old world; and they reported that the world was round. Men of Middle-earth looked up with fear and wonder seeing the Númenóreans that descended out of the sky; and they took these mariners of the air to be gods, and some of the Númenóreans were content that this should be so."

The Silmarillion ends up being quite similar to the bible, not in the respect of Melkor being Lucifer and such, but in the whole genealogy aspect, the bible does that with the jews, Tolkien does with the elves. It really is the only thing I find utterly boring, specially since elves are immortal so when one of them suddenly shows up later on Tolkien doesn't bother reintroducing them since he already did with genealogy trees a few chapters back.

>reported that the world was round.
Lolwhat. Arda was made round after Numenor was destroyed.

Well that's a valid point.

but the books are still great. The book (Sil) really captures your imagination and a wikipedia article can't capture that same feeling I don't think.

I don't what the fuck this is supposed to be a quote of, but it sure ain't Tolkien.

Who the fuck is this Fin "another fucking elf" ?

Oh it's that guy, appeared for one scene and not heard from for years/chapters.

You are allowed to look at the glossary and look it up, it's encouraged.

It's a quote from The History of Middle Earth: Sauron Defeated
Blame Christopher Tolkien

>literally so mad his hundred year siege was broken he goes "1v1 me fagit u won't" to literally Satan
>Satan is actually scared of how angry the elf king is but can't back down lest he looks bad in front of his minions
>he beats him but not before Fingolfin stabs and cripples him for all eternity in his leg laughing in his fucking face even as he dies
>Satan is constantly reminded of his unwanted duel thanks to constant leg pain and a crippled walk

Fingolfin was the realest nigga

1V1 ME MID LANE FAGGOT U WONT

Everyone here writes the events of the silmarillion better than tolkien

I want to read it but its so fucking boring

Eru just don't make elves like he used too...

he wrote it the absolute plebman

I don't get you. Maybe listen to the audiobook? Martin Shaw makes it really enjoyable to listen to.

No it's just condensed.

It's like eating the icing on the cake or finding the screencaps of greentext. They are the best for a reason.

Nothing tops Tolkien.

It's just that the presentation is cut down and accessible without needing to read many pages and understanding it.

Some parts of the book are boring, there a pages detailing forests/ridges/paths in certain areas and it's unnecessary. But the story is worth it.

It's like a TV show- once the show builds up to a point and the payoff comes you realise it's worth it.

Why we're all the elves in the movies such faggots?

The silmarillion is just a collection of stories. An anthology.

Read it in bursts, you fucking brainlet.

Like modern times, they haven't had to face anything nearly as bad as war with Melkor.

Sauron wasn't quite as destructive as him so it was relatively peaceful.

Their time was over. Sauron wins = they die, or have to leave. Sauron is defeated, and the ring is destroyed = the three rings lose their power, they can't preserve middle earth anymore and the weariness gets to them (they have to leave).

No it isn't.

u fucking wot m8.

>Now news came to Hithlum that Dorthonion was lost and the sons of Finarfin overthrown, and that the sons of Fëanor were driven from their lands. Then Fingolfin beheld (as it seemed to him) the utter ruin of the Noldor, and the defeat beyond redress of all their houses; and filled with wrath and despair he mounted upon Rochallor his great horse and rode forth alone, and none might restrain him. He passed over Dor-nu-Fauglith like a wind amid the dust, and all that beheld his onset fled in amaze, thinking that Oromë himself was come: for a great madness of rage was upon him, so that his eyes shone like the eyes of the Valar. Thus he came alone to Angband's gates, and he sounded his horn, and smote once more upon the brazen doors, and challenged Morgoth to come forth to single combat. And Morgoth came.

>That was the last time in those wars that he passed the doors of his stronghold, and it is said that he took not the challenge willingly; for though his might was greatest of all things in this world, alone of the Valar he knew fear. But he could not now deny the challenge before the face of his captains; for the rocks rang with the shrill music of Fingolfin's horn, and his voice came keen and clear down into the depths of Angband; and Fingolfin named Morgoth craven, and lord of slaves. Therefore Morgoth came, climbing slowly from his subterranean throne, and the rumour of his feet was like thunder underground. And he issued forth clad in black armour; and he stood before the King like a tower, iron-crowned, and his vast shield, sable on-blazoned, cast a shadow over him like a stormcloud. But Fingolfin gleamed beneath it as a star; for his mail was overlaid with silver, and his blue shield was set with crystals; and he drew his sword Ringil, that glittered like ice.

Using big words doesn't make you sound smart, you know. It just makes you look like a pretentious faggot

He is right though.

>Big words
>American """education""

were you desperate to bump the thread or did you really think that was a substantive comment that you were just desperate to get out

he's being efficient but still not saying much

dont get so offended buh duh wuhds

Yes it is, read the ebook and see for yourself

e-reading.club/bookreader.php/138987/Tolkien_09_Sauron_Defeated.pdf

Wasn't Simarillion just a collection of random stories Tolkien had laying about that his son put together into a "history of Middle-Earth" type narrative?

>Fingolfin thinks so high of himself he challenges Melkor to a duel.
>Melkor, not wanting to look like a bitch in front of his whole kingdom, accepts.
>Not only does Melkor wins, he shatters Fingolfin's corpse.
>The scar Melkor ends up with from this duel had to be by, of course, the eagles, who showed up to pick up Fingolfin's corpse and scratched Melkor on the way out.

Why does is Fingolfin's duel always presented as some epic fight for the ages if he died like a bitch?

...

rollingstone.com/tv/news/george-r-r-martin-the-rolling-stone-interview-20140423

I think he was referring to this interview. During it, GRRM complains about genocide and taxation and morality, etc. Can you imagine Tolkien dealing with taxation and public works? As much as I like Tolkien's works, there are a few passages that could be truncated about rolling hills and knolls. Having read and translated more Livy and Ab Urbe Condita than I'd ever want to again, I'd imagine it'd be much the same for Tolkien writing about taxation. Who wants to read grainary reports? Is GRRM delusional? That's not fiction.

>As much as I like Tolkien's works, there are a few passages that could be truncated about rolling hills and knolls

I love those parts because they remind me of my hometown.

Selling it short.

They weren't random stories.

They were parts of the same mythos that Tolkien wrote throughout his life and never really finished it completely.

His Son took the pieces and tried to assemble them in way that fits what he had to work with.

Every time

Lol

Dealt with it in The Scouring of the Shire

>alchemists
>0 results
good ruse m8

It's about courage user. He dared to try.

And no Fingolfin wounds him. No shitty eagles.

where they treated as a non-current asset and if so, did they account for depreciation even though they had an infinite useful economic lifetime?

Don't they? IIRC the eagles scar Melkor's face when they drop by to pick Fingolfin's corpse.

Fingolfin wounds him 8 times (which never heal and always hurt, and also render him lame), then an eagle scars his face.

They pick up his body but Fingolfin specifically wounds him. The eagles don't. They might attacked his face.

No, Fingolfin slices his ankle/foot

Melkor is reaching towards Fingolfin to crush his body, Thorondor swoops in and scars Melkor's face and carries Fingolfin's body away. Thorondor did scar Melkor, but Fingolfin did wound him.

Jesus Christ.

>he wounded Morgoth with seven wounds, and seven times Morgoth gave a cry of anguish, .
>Yet with his last and desperate stroke Fingolfin hewed the foot with Ringil, and the blood gashed forth black and smoking and filled the pits of Grond.
> Thorondor came hasting from his eyrie among the peaks of the Crissaegrim, and he stooped upon Morgoth and marred his face.
>Morgoth went ever halt of one foot after that day, and the pain of his wounds could not be healed; and in his face was the scar that Thorondor made.

I think that's what I wrote just in a different way.

How does an elf even wound a god?

>implying Túrin Turambar's chapter wasn't the best in the book

Nobody is debating that

I like Túrin the most too. I think the worst part is the beginning. The wars between the elves and Melkor, and Turin are the best parts.

Only because it's slow.
It builds up nicely I think.

That's a big dragon.

>implying that jewels with """inherent value""" can depreciate

...

degenerate city dweller detected

>y were there no hobbit strip clubs lmao XD

*blocks your path*

What was his problem again?

Because Tolkien literally didn't give a shit about it being entertaining when he wrote it.

>literally god
>does fuck all with his powers