>be in theater
>"i am....."
>audience eyes widen in anticipation
>"groot"
>audiences starts clapping and screaming with laughter while throwing their fedoras at the screen
>on the back of me I hear people singing The Game of Thrones tune with the text "i am groot"
>chris pratt walked in front of the screen and start dancing like PSY while chanting "UP UP UP UPVOTE REDDIT STYLE"
>meanwhile people pull out their phones and start taking pictures of Chris and posting it on reddit
>as I wanted to leave the theatre I stumble on a band of 30 manchildren chanting "UPVOTE REDDIT STYLE .... UP, UP UP UPVOTE REDDIT STYLE" while dancing like PSY
>desperately trying to escape this hell hole I see alot of children crying of fear but their parents don't seem to respond
>as I take a look around the theatre trying to find an escape I come to the conclusion that the whole audience except for the children are singing and dancing "UPVOTE REDDIT STYLE"
>in a desperate attempt to survive I pick one of the fedoras on the ground and start chanting "I AM GROOT" to every person I come across while trying to escape
>the crowd didn't seem to notice me and as I walked out of the theatre I looked back
>the children are getting crushed by the amount of people dancing and singing like PSY
>i remember the tears on their faces but all I heard while finally leaving the theatre were the people screaming "upvote reddit style"
Be in theater
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*upvotes*
xD
>mfw everyone started clapping when groot pressed the left button
That movie is epic stop hating you fucking hipstir
UPBOAT REDDIT STYLE
Just turn your brain off man it's fun
I was lucky and could watched this movie in an almost empty cinema. Comfy and I didn't have to hear or see people acting like stupid faggots.
lets get this to the front page guys
>GotG 1 & 2 are just largely unfunny comedy pastiches of various aspects of She: A History of Adventure
en.wikipedia.org
>A young Cambridge University professor, Horace Holly, is visited by a colleague, Vincey, who reveals that he will soon die. Vincey proceeds to tell Holly a fantastical tale of his family heritage. He charges Holly with the task of raising his young son, Leo (whom he has never seen) and gives Holly a locked iron box, with instructions that it is not to be opened until Leo turns 25. Holly agrees, and indeed Vincey is found dead the next day. Holly raises the boy as his own; when the box is opened on Leo's 25th birthday they discover the ancient and mysterious "Sherd of Amenartas", which seems to corroborate Leo's father's story. Holly, Leo and their servant, Job, follow instructions on the Sherd and travel to eastern Africa but are shipwrecked. They alone survive, together with their Arab captain, Mahomed; after a perilous journey into an uncharted region of the African interior, they are captured by the savage Amahagger people. The adventurers learn that the natives are ruled by a fearsome white queen, who is worshipped as Hiya or "She-who-must-be-obeyed". The Amahagger are curious about the white-skinned interlopers, having been warned of their coming by the mysterious queen.
>Billali, the chief elder of one of the Amahagger tribes, takes charge of the three men, introducing them to the ways of his people. Billali tells Holly that he needs to go and report the white men's arrival to She. In his absence, some of the Amahagger become restless and seize Mahomed, intending to eat him as part of a ritual "hot pot".
I know that all of this is the core of the superhero fantasy - the desire to have gods swoop down and rescue us from ourselves, or those who seek to destroy us, and to wilfully discard their own lives to prop up our failing, decadent societies. The ultimate in self sacrifice. A higher power personified in service of the weak and the feeble, for order and justice. But there's a subtly fascistic element to this too, as these gods more often than not uphold the laws of the society they're beholden to and do so with or without the public's approval. When the public disapproves of their vigilantism this is generally portrayed as foolishness or outright ignorance because the hero knows what is truly best for them. And for some superhero fans this is a self-insert fantasy - because what guy wouldn't want to kick society's dregs to the curb with insurmountable authoritarian force. That said, there is an implicit understanding that these gods are not us, no matter how relatable they're made out to be. They're either born with powers beyond the capacity of man, receive these powers but still accept the responsibility of becoming a saviour, or their filthy fucking rich.
So how do you make an interesting story that comments on the nature of man when the main character isn't even human. Just an inserted "perfect" ideal? And you'll note how superhero movies never really comment on morality or ideology. Whether or not the hero is doing the right thing at all, whether or not he's actually the hero, is never the focus. It's not a story about men struggling to do the best they can in a world that isn't black and white. It's just "muh daddy issues" where the hero has to struggle against personal issues that have nothing to do with the actual problem so that he's strong enough to do the objectively right thing at the end.
THAT is why they're shit.
i know this thread is a joke but holy fuck was baby groot annoying.
>you will never get a teenage groot highschool story
FUK
Vin Diesel is likely to make more money than I am in my entire life, for just saying 'I am Groot'.
They are taken to the home of the queen, which lies near the ruins of the lost city of Kôr, a once mighty civilisation that predated the Egyptians. The queen and her retinue live under a dormant volcano in a series of catacombs built as tombs for the people of Kôr. There, Holly is presented to the queen, a white sorceress named Ayesha. Her beauty is so great that it enchants any man who beholds it. When she shows herself, however, Holly is enraptured and prostrates himself before her. Ayesha reveals that she has learned the secret of immortality and that she possesses other supernatural powers including the ability to read the minds of others, a form of telegnosis and the ability to heal wounds and cure illness; she is also revealed to have a tremendous knowledge of chemistry, but is notably unable to see into the future.
In the climax of the novel, Ayesha takes the two men to see the Pillar of Fire, passing through the ruined city of Kôr into the heart of the ancient volcano.
wtf I hate the Guardians of the Galaxy movies and comics featuring the Sovereign now
You make over and over again this thread but still crybaby shit autism.
And you tears don't make the movie less succesful.
upvoted, reddit-style.
Very interesting writing style you have there, my friend. Sup Forums gold for you and an up boat.
i lol'd
...
nice try but we all know you were still in the manlet pit when this happened
What in the fucking fuck is this
no one clapped when he hit the left button... i feel like anyone who did was autistic
kino
I don't fly the arrow with my head boy, I fly it with my heart.
anymore webms from the movie? namely the warping scene.
...
That scene was fucking rad.
Awesome! loved that scene.
F*CKING HELLA EPIC!
>some DCuck took the time to write all this
Such a sad life.
lol did 5 they reuse assets from Pixels?
Fucking amazing scene goddamn. I would pay 50$ just for Rocket and Yondu scenes
Kill everyone in this thread.
A reference to a statement from earlier in the movie.
K I N O
I can taste the salt from here
worst part is I like DC better but BvS is and will always be shit to me
Trying really hard.
Anyone else see the dick on the left or am I have gay hallucinations again?
>again
Definitely a nice hefty set of balls but not much else there buddy
The worst part of the movie. I was literally the only person who groaned in pain, everyone else was laughing...
The final showdown between a god-like being and his wife's son.
ur too cool for skool n that m8
I liked it.
Maybe you've got a terminal case of edgy teenager.
shit they got vinny for it?
Yes. And Rocket is Bradley Cooper.
Why is no one mentioning how passive and boring Quill was?
>dad calls, he goes
>sits there, waits while everyone does shit
>says no, little fight, says no again
the end
>Why is no one mentioning how passive and boring Quill was?
Because he wasn't.
Am I alone in thinking this was significantly better than the first? Like by a huge margin? This actually felt like the breathe of fresh air for the Marvel formula that everyone claimed the first one was.