At work today, I met a man in a straw hat. He came up to the deli case. When our eyes met...

At work today, I met a man in a straw hat. He came up to the deli case. When our eyes met, we just looked into each other's souls for a while. He knew that I knew. I smiled warmly and calmly said, "Big fan."

"Thanks," he replied.

I did ask him a few questions before he left.

"Are you spiritual?"
"What goes on in Hollywood?"
"What goes on behind the scenes in Hollywood?"
"Are you part of any secret societies?"

In that order. We were face to face. I read people very well, and this man was extremely emotive. His every move told a story.

Can you tell who he is, Sup Forums?

Kodak Black

Is he classic?

Hitler.

Kim Coates

Malick?

paul mcartney

nice blog op

fuk u

Maybe this picture will be more clear.

Mark Linn-Baker

I can't tell who it is, but he looks pretty classic...

I shupposh chilled wins are off the table as well?

blart paul

Who is that?

Looks like my cousin Eric

Wonder what he's thinking.

KEANU

jeff foxworthy

Liam nesn

Look at that fucking nose.

is that matthew mcconahey

Keanu

what city is this?

austin

Classic?

matthew mcconaughey
too easy

It's Matthew McConnaughey

Looks like him, plus Matthew is very spiritual

He told me that he believes in God.

another shitty reddit thread

too late i already gueesed who it was and what city

theres no way thats keanu from that last pic... who could it be?

>all you can eat buffet at a supermarket

Kill yourself fat American fags

It still counts bitch

its a whole foods not golden corral

>matthew mcconahey
don't know who that is? I know who matthew mcconaughey is though, so I guessed it first nigger

He came to Cleveland's east side, to take care of a few things.

fuck off i won

>God
>trip 7s
Really made me think

Like?

i still won so eat a nigger cock

did you tell him Sahara is the greatest movie of all time?

y-you first

>if man is 5
>then the devil is 6
>then God is 7

Ryan Gosling at the grocery store the other day

That wasn't an accident. 777 is the God code.
For one, he was with a lady.

Wilson from Home Improvement

so what were McConaughey's answers?

It's a fucking salad bar you retard.

Did you ask him why he agreed to co-star with a nigger as Roland?

reported for doxxing

To the second question, he answered "Make good stories." He said a few other things in the same vein but indicated to me more with his eyes. He knew what I meant and that scared him. He sounded like he was hiding something, like he had to stop himself from blurting the truth out.

To the third question he answered "We get together to make a good story," and the like. Again avoiding the real question, but little did he know I read body language like a book, and can discern when most anyone lies, including him. He again had to compose himself after understanding what I meant. The eyes are the gateway to the soul.

To the fourth question, he looked at me with a knowing look. The word "no" desperately came out of his mouth, but his eyes told another story. "Maybe my family." With that, I knew he was a satanist like most of the rest. It was written all over his face and I did feel that energy.

What did he think of you just standing there and taking pictures like a paparazzi?

It's Bill Murray.

he took me out back and rode my ass like a hiv stricken urban cowboy