FUCK I'm jewish

Today I found out that I am jewish. My maternal Grandmother, who I was never told anything about, turns out she was a Belgian Ashkenazi onionnose.

FUCK!

Other urls found in this thread:

mfa.gov.il/mfa/aboutisrael/state/pages/acquisition of israeli nationality.aspx
immortallife.info/articles/entry/why-is-the-iq-of-ashkenazi-jews-so-high
google.com/?ion=1&espv=2#q=john miller
twitter.com/NSFWRedditGif

Do you even consider the Torah to be a sacred scripture?

Go and claim your free money famalam

rememer the 6 gorillion

Nothing to be upset about, you can get an Israeli citizenship using your jewish heritage

Where do I do that?
I don't know dude. I don't care about religion.
Is it nice? Can I not give a shit about Religion there? Will I need to poison some wells?

>Is it nice?
Better than Merkel's Germany

>Can I not give a shit about Religion there?
Yes, I'm an atheist

>Will I need to poison some wells?
If you stay in the 67' borders so no, if you cross them so maybe

Can I bring my Orthodox Serbian Girlfriend?

You should go start a business. You have the blood.

Yes, marry her and she can get a citizenship too

read here for more info: mfa.gov.il/mfa/aboutisrael/state/pages/acquisition of israeli nationality.aspx

Israel is fine as long as you don't mind the heat. Also don't go into the (((wrong cities))) and you can be an atheist as much as you want, like I am. Planning to move out though.

haha hell yeah my nigga oy to the muthafuckin vey

Already did and it's doing well. I am a gold smith. I'm fucking freaking out about this man, I'm a jewish fucking gold smith. How much more cliché can I get?

Try farting while taking a shower. That way you can claim you've been holocausted.

ouch sorry user. dont know what id do if i was a evil kike

Have you had any sudden urges to lend people money?

Congrats on achieving high IQ DNA lol

If it's any reassurance, Ashkenazi Jews are at the very very least 80% European by DNA, but they've eugenicised themselves during medieval Europe (which is why Jews are so smart, maybe how they have been able to run the world, who nose). Genetically, Ashkenazis are super close to Northern Italians, because as I understand this is the timeline of Ashkenazis:

Romans invade and eventually kick Jews out of Israel.
Lots of Jews settle near Rome, a large amount in the city of Lucca.
Western Rome falls, later Charlemagne invites the Jews to the Rhineland.
Jews persecuted and forced Eastwards by persecution. During lots of this period, Jews take up jobs in finance because something about Christianity prevents Christians from doing so. Jews that earn more have more kids, and as the Jews got their money from finance (mathsy jobs), it can be said that Jews that were better at maths (basically, Jews that were smarter) had more kids (hence the eugenics).
The whole Hitler thing, holocaust or holohoax, gets rid of most of the Jews in Europe. Some go to the USA some go to Israel, others move/remain in Western Europe

oy vey, it's anudda shoah

all european are little mixed but that yours is so bad. my condolence...

gas yourself, you're a scourge on Germany, trip to israel is good enough to cleanse the land of jewish filth.

How about that gold bull market though eh?

Maybe your rat instincts will make you rich. Especially if Trump wins.

Nope, but until today I was considering studying watchmaking to expand my business. I am generally quite frugal.
>Spain being disgusting
Why am I not surprised?

>Belgian Ashkenazi onionnose

Isn't 80% of Ashkenazis non-Israelites though?

I dont know, maybe because you are used to being a disgusting cuck yourself, who created scat porn and is letting millions of illiterate refugees get their way with your women.

Don't cry, kike genes turn out to be pretty good

immortallife.info/articles/entry/why-is-the-iq-of-ashkenazi-jews-so-high

Gold always works. When gold is worth shit you make jewelry, when it's worth much you sell what you have as bars. Whatever spare time you have you do restoration of heirlooms.

The only reason to not do well if you are in gold is because of either of these reasons:
>Be just another banker focusing only on gold trade
>Be just another jeweler focusing only on jewelry

Only downsides I can think of are that you might not be as good looking as a native German and you're slightly more susceptible to genetic diseases

I'm also a jew, who found it a few months ago out.

Come home, hebrew man. Don't be ashamed of your jewish heritage, we are the chosen people and if you look at the worlds, you'll slowly see that it's true.

>most noble price winners
>highest IQ amongst all other races
>beautiful women
>not cucked

The jew hate on this website is just a resentiment, they deep inside want to be just like us, because they know that we are the real masterrace.

Pic related.

I laughed way too much at this post.

Disgusting abomination.

Jews are pretty damn ugly on average, and that's coming from a Brit

I would love to call the Jews allies but as long as they attempt to destroy us and destroy western civilizations we will always remind them that all it took was one crazy german guy to btfo them for all of time with muh 6 gorillion

You don't read the Torah or go to Temple. You are not Jewish.

I read the Quran and follow the 5 prat schedule and the rest of the tenets. Yes, even the one that says no sex before marriage. I am Muslim.

You are not Jewish. You're an Atheistic German. Glad I could help.

Hitler found out same shit... didn't stop the redpill he swallowed. Genetic tests after the fact don't changes the facts. What you know to be true is still true. There are blacks that understand the stupidity of their race, there are russians who understand the bad parts of their society, there are americans who love and hate america and understand its pros and cons. My point is, knowing this doesn't change anything for you. Other than maybe stop pushing, gas the jews meme because it now includes you, but you can still fight for the cause.

Interestingly enough, I have my mothers small nose while my dad, pure Hannover german ancestry, has a massive honker. Got the blonde hair from him though, and the blue eyes. Wouldn't say good looking, but I always get enough attention to win by charm.
Still hated as fuck and for good reason.

wtf I hate atheistic germans now

>Jews are pretty damn ugly on average, and that's coming from a Brit

Nope they aren't. Jews look quite handsome.
(Pic related)
You're a paki, so you have no right to call other people ugly, you goatfucking vermin.

>Disgusting abomination.

[RESENTIMENT INTENSIFIES]

>not knowing Jews are both an ethnicity (two, actually) and a religion

Let's be real, with the Don supporting Israel we want to be pro-jew but the greed and liberalism associated with your race is... pretty... pretty scary.

>Who nose
Kek

Use it as a shield while you help to save the white race from destruction. Trump has many based Jews on his team, for instance (including that Miller guy).

It's interesting, because as far as I am aware most Jews are right-wing (fear of Muslims, national security of Israel etc.) but there are tonnes of liberal feminist PC Jews throughout the media, can't really explain why. I feel they're up to something, probably worshipping Moloch or some shit.

>including that Miller guy
John Miller?

Sauce: google.com/?ion=1&espv=2#q=john miller

Welcome to the conspiracy.

>throughout the media

And academia, the court system, banking, pornograpy, etc. These domains -- The ones which have the most direct and largest impact on the culture -- are all controlled by Jews.

kek, meant Stephen Miller, AKA Trump's Goebbels.