What has been your worst experience at the theater?

What has been your worst experience at the theater?

Fucking LXM, halfway through the goddamn movie it starts playing upside down and the sound was sped and up and reversed!

I live near a cool old theater that shows classic movies sometimes. Around christmas they showed National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation and i was really pumped because i hadn't watched it since i was a kid and didn't really even know any of what happens.

Unbeknownst to me, this theater does "quote-alongs" where patrons are allowed and perhaps even encouraged to "say" the lines of the movie in unison while they occur. So instead of me getting to watch the movie and enjoy it, i instead heard 100 hipster faggots shouting out every funny line together over the entire movie. By the end i was murderous.

Nobody will ever have a worse theater experience than this so just delete the thread

Dumb teenage counts giggling during Gravity
>Sandra in her undies
>teeheeteeheeteehee
>any quiet moment
>gigglegigglegiggle

>Unbeknownst to me, this theater does "quote-alongs" where patrons are allowed and perhaps even encouraged to "say" the lines of the movie in unison while they occur.

>The Winter Soldier debut
>climax action scene
>screen cuts out
>goes back to normal when the action is over
>they don't rewind
>they don't even give us a refund

What you thought it was going to be something stupid about penis inspections?

I saw american gangster while turbo high and blacked out. Woke up with my drink on the floor

Good thing I was too groggy to feel social embarrassment.

Saw Wolf of Wall Street and somehow this family of blacks brought their child in. He would not shut the fuck up and the parents didn't do anything about it. There was a point when he literally ran into the gap that separates the front from back rows and started doing some stupid jiggy.
Also, any horror movie with blacks.

I've had three bad experiences.

1. Black dude and his wife (I live in a mostly white area) wouldn't shut up first 30 minutes of a Mission Impossible movie, asked him politely to please be quiet. He got louder, so I stood up and just blocked his view of the screen, he went to punch me, I pushed him, he ran for a manager, came back, the people around me said he wouldn't stop talking and started with me, manager kicked them out, gave us free movie tickets.

2. Adult in front row for Ocean's 12, likely posts on Sup Forums kept reading the subtitles and words on the screen. He was probably autistic or something, but he was LOUD, I asked him nicely to please stop, and he ran out of the theater crying. Didn't come back, I kind of felt bad but not really.

3. Went to see a movie with a girl I just started dating, and she wanted to blow me during the movie, so I let her, old lady came in halfway through the movie(who shows up halfway through a movie?) and saw what she was doing and flipped the fuck out, which made me cum, which made the girl choke unexpectedly.

She went to tell the manager, who happened to be an old middle school friend, and well there was no proof, so nothing happened.

This is boss

went to see John Wick 2 with a horrible hangover when i was visiting a friend at his uni and the rest of my friends wanted to see that shit. slept through the entire 1st act.

I don't know what's worse, your made up stories and the fact you took the time to type them out on a ching chong fortune cookie pedophile cartoon secret underworld

First Bay's Transformers movie.

I went with my high school buddies and the theatre was almost empty due to the fact we went like two days before it phasing out of cinemas.

There we couple of people but mostly empty.

We say down and suddenly some mid 30s dude sat behind us and started to talk about Transfomers, all the lore and other garbage.

We just said to him to fuck off but he wouldn't stop.

We changed seats but the autist followed us.

Finally some adults there were watching intervened and guy just ran away.

Probably some pedo autist.

I actually paid to see the green lantern

When I was like 10 some teenagers started throwing popcorn at me and my little brother when we tried to watch Pokemon the first movie. We didn't talk or anything we didn't know what we could do since they were so much older than us.

Were you the autist that ran out during the movie?

i paid money to see Battleship.

When I saw Rob Zombie's Halloween with my brother, and this group of flappy-cunted bitches sitting directly behind us yapped through the WHOLE thing. Literally nonstop. I was surprised it was even possible. When it was done I turned around and said "Thanks for RUINING the whole fucking movie!" They gave be a blank stare.

Thanks for the first good laugh I've had this week user.

>going to the cinema all alone as always
>the usual routine, bought two tickets and the multiculturally approved combo of hummus and goatmilk, family size
>also brought a womens jacket which I hold on my right arm when I enter
>"Excuse me sir but where is your companion?"
>"Oh she's at the bathroom no worries" *point at the jacket*
>"Enjoy your kíno sir"
>a bit sweaty from that interaction but it all seems good, have plenty of time to cool down during ads
>lights go off, movie finally starts
>let out the last few farts from the warm goatmilk so I can finally enjoy my highly anticipated flick
>suddenly the opening credits are stopped, cinema staff bullies come in with flashlights
>Saw a guy drinking the offensive Coca Cola drink so they gotta be after him
>but the main cinema bully flashes right at me and yells "RIGHT THERE! GET THE LOSER"
>they are clearly onto me, should've brought a more convincing and expensive women's jacket
>the whole row is throwing me out, spitting and throwing stones at me
>cinema staff bullies drag me out of there with the whole crowd cheering and clapping
>"This is the third time you broke the 'no singles policy', you're going to jail you fucking weirdo"
>they throw me in the cinema jail, small dirty cell with no windows or toilet (pic related), just a designated shitting corner
>they don't tell me the time or date so I don't know if I was there for weeks or months
>survive on eating only leftover spilled cinema hummus and sheep blood which the cinema staff scrapes of the floor of every screening
>get to know all the other losers in nearby cells, we form a secret women hating club in there
>one other loser overhears our conversation and starts yelling at us
>brawl ensues, cinema jail clans are fighting to death
>I pretend dead so the staff throws me out in the dumpster with the rest of the bodies
>wait for the night to fall and run back home to my room
>have to start collecting good boy points all over again

and that's why I torrent

Pls leave

Most of my terrible experiences involve children or crying babies. Parents need to realize that they can't enjoy normal things when they have children to raise, definitely not in public.

My other terrible experiences involve assigned seating, which is the new idiotic trend hitting theaters in my area. Because I really want to do with my free time is drive ten to fifteen minutes to a theater half an hour before the show starts just to get decent seats. It's like theaters don't give a shit. Overpriced food, shitty times (unless it's 3D), overcrowded theaters, assigned seating, doesn't matter. You're still going to see the latest China-approved blockbuster.

When i was like 6 or something my parents took the whole family to see the first harry potter movie. It was around xmas time and we lived in upstate ny, so it was fucking freezing. Anyways, like 15 minutes into the movie some blowhard pulled the fire alarm and the entire population of the theater evacuated and had to spend like half an hour outside while they figured out what was going on. Everyone got ticket vouchers, though.

Use the internet and buy the tix ahead of time?

No singles rule hurt your feelings?

Not worst but hilarious in absurdity.

Parents took kid to first SAW movie (yes, I am dead serious).

Kid was screaming and crying so hard the parents finally took him out but I was just laughing how absurd it was.

I actually did that once and when I got to the theater, there were people in our seats. Their tickets were for the same seats.

tip top kek
has anyone ever had a "no singles policy" experience in real life?

>be me
>about to walk in to alien covenant with my gf and a friend
>Walk in to theater
>only us
>Feelgoodman.jpeg
>Previews start
>Obese dindus
Should I continue?

fucking clickbait
just type out your story cunt

Got a stick up your ass?
What's your deal mother fucker

Went to see a horror flick and a bunch of black teenagers were behind us, need I say more?

They were laughing at you

>go to cinema alone
>feet and armpits get all sweaty
>can't bare to look the stub collector in the eye
>make my way to my seat
>nothing but row after row after row of happy, attractive couples
>squeeze past a line of cute teenagers
>can hear them whisper to each other, probably about me
>trip over one of their legs
>smack my head on an armrest
>soda and popcorn goes everywhere
>basically full on crying at this stage
>eventually get to my seat
>can feel everyone staring at me
>distinctly hear someone say "how pathetic"
>pit in my stomach plummets
>feel a sharp jolt
>I'm lying in bed
>it was all a bad dream
>roll over and spoon my girlfriend
>she reaches around and gives my raging member a playful squeeze

Anyone else know this feel?

Going into a cinema in India.

No, I thought it was going to be about a fucking beta who didn't have the balls to demand a refund from the twelve year olds at the ticket counter and I wasn't disappointed

They should put this post next to the definition of autism

Enjoying your first week on Sup Forums? Please lurk for 2 years before posting

Kek

>friends in high school making me see Borat
>audience laughing at the most inane retarded shit
>2 of the shittiest little 14-year-old douchebags sitting near me, like Beavis and Butthead tier
>there is a part in the movie where someone is going to kill a chicken and one of the kids shouts "dont cut the cock!" and other people in the audience find this funny

Some redneck threatened to murder my friend and I because we were laughing during the jungle book

Man of Steel

some guy threatening me because his retard son claimed I was kicking his seat, when actually he was repeatedly leaning back in the seat and bumping off my knees

Alamo Drafthouse does these, but they heavily advertise that it's a quote-along. I'd wager you missed all the warnings. That's how I fist saw The Breakfast Club, and I knew it was a quote-along. No desire to ever see it again at this point.

My story:
>have colicky infant
>life is hell
>finally get a day off thanks to nanny starting
>wife wants to see movie
>go to Alamo Drafthouse
>10AM Force Awakens
>sit down
>order food and drink
>sit through pre-show BS
>move about to start
>big letters on screen
>THIS IS A KID-FRIENDLY SHOWING
>look around
>about 30 children with parents
>no child over age of 5
>tons of infants and toddlers
>notice some are already crying
>get up from seats
>exit theater
>politely ask for refund and cancel food and drink orders
>head across town to Regal theater
>no kids in sight
>very few patrons
>movie sucks

I hate you

>Me, my mom and my cousin who was crippled at that time going to see madagascar 2
>the cinema was full
>it didn't have a "reserve a seat" feature
>the only maybe four avaiable seats was too far away from each other
>we decided to sit in the stairs
>me, my mom and my crippled cousin sitting in the stairs
>there was a wheelchair, by the way
>people constantly having to use the stairs
>one kid kicked my coke and we had to sit two steps down
6/10

>head across town to Regal theater
nice choice but fuck austin

>let me type the setting for my story and then ask all the anons on Sup Forums to like comment and subscribe to get the ActualStory™ DLC

How did you sleep through those fucking loud as shit gun sounds

Never had a bad experience in cinema because Im not american.

>Sits on the stairs in a dark movie theater

Seriously fucking kill yourself

poo poo pee pee normos out RRREEEEEE

Wanting to watch a movie and hear the sound qualifies as autism now? Interesting.

Every single thread on Sup Forums no matter the subject, an insecure European has to point out they aren't American


Pretty pathetic tbqh

I just wrote out a massive paragraph BTFOing you, you're lucky I closed the tab accidentally you would have been fucking annihilated consider this your Christmas miracle

Crab legs too cold

Every single time that happens an assblasted americuck has to respond while crying his eyes out

The imense screen lights up the room, also the glowind thing in the stairs you fucking idiot.

Agreed. We decided never to go to Alamo again after that. And we're just waiting for either of us to get laid off before we finally call Austin quits.

Can my Xmas miracle be they you not be a literal retard and sit on the stairs in a movie theater like some kind of faggot instead?

>He's still trying convince himself we care that he's European

Me either

Some guy pulled out his phone once during a movie for a second, but that was it.

>european

you misspelled arab

Those words are synonyms now

I remember going to see The Hobbit with work friends and this happened to us.

All the normie chad types sat there and said nothing so eventually I turned around and told them to shut the fuck up. Which they did but it didn't change the fact that movie was pure trash.

>THIS IS A KID-FRIENDLY SHOWING
That sounds terrible. What parent in their right mind would want to take their screaming brat to be with other screaming brats for two hours?

I have a confirmed IQ of 130 and I once knocked someone unconscious in a fight because they praised Community in front of me. Nice try you fucking faggot. If you abide pleb culture like Pine Barrens for one moment then you're doing just as much damage as the people buying TBBT and Breaking Bad box sets. Everyone who belongs on this board should have a zero tolerance policy on pandering anti-intellectualism.

This makes you look way more insecure than his post. Basically confirming what he hinted at with your butthurt.

>I'd wager you missed all the warnings

No, the only warnings were on their facebook page, nothing in the theater mentioned it. I asked the bartender in the lobby about it when i stepped out to get a drink and he said he just assumed people knew about it.

I've seen more serious classics there with no quoting so it must be the comedies where they let people do this.

> watching The Jungle Book with wife
> this kid is sat next to us, because his breeding sow of a mother took up the entire row behind us with her other spawn (small theater)
>for whatever reason, this little brat decides to start talking to us before the movie
>look at this little fuck like he's insane
>my wife, being a decent human being, humors him and talks with him
> Bitch, what the fuck are you doing?!
>the brat's mom tells him to be quiet
> little fuck won't...stop...talking
>Movie has started
> Mother tells him to shut up
> He stops for like a minute, but then talks to us again about the movie and has the most asinine, obvious observations
> This time, I ask him to be quiet
> He stops...for a few minutes, eventually he is compelled to make comments to us
>Mother gets fed up and takes all her kids and they all leave
>Rest of the movie is comfy

Seriously, if you have such little control over your children, you should not be taking them to a movie

Kek

Saw BvS crossfaded. Enjoyed like the first hour and then it turned into a horror film. Batman starts killing people, bashes superman's head in with a sink, and then Superman dies. I don't know what evil universe spawned BvS but part of me wants more

>Go to watch Logan with sister and her fiancé
>packed theater
>Trailers end, fox logo and shit
>lights go up
>movie stops
>manager comes up
>"Okay, if people don't leave the seats they're not supposed to be in, we're not showing the movie"
>he had an army of about 5 pissed off people behind him
>absolute awkward silence for about 10 seconds
>5 people get up from seats in the top and slowly go down the stairs
>One group is a couple, husband is pissed, wife is ashamed, they're taking forever to get there
>the rest was a group of 3 friends that went pretty quickly to their original seats, all the way in the front
>the husband stops at his row and looks for his seat
>manager goes, in the driest way he can: "Sir, there's a number on your ticket, right next to a letter. That's your seat"
>chuckling starts
>guy is still taking forever to take a seat, he's bursting with anger
>all the way from the back a black dude starts
>"GET ON WITH IT DUDE, NO ONE HAS TIME FOR YOUR BULLSHIT. SIT YOUR ASS DOWN ALREADY GODDAMN"
>theater starts cracking up
>original 5 people are already seated in their stolen seats
>husband goes "Easy there, buddy. I paid to be here too". He's still not sitting in his shitty seat.
>"PAID TO WASTE OUR TIME AND STAND THERE LIKE A FUCKING DUMBASS? JUST GET ON WITH IT, YOUR SEAT'S RIGHT THERE."
>crowd is fully cackling at the spectacle
>husband was about to say something but his wife just started to pull him shirt, hand on her face.
>he angrily seats down, absolutely seething
>we all watch Logan

It was a pretty good afternoon, honestly

Gravity.
The movie was shit. Thankfully I was there with a couple of friends so we could talk about how shitty the movie was afterwards

I bet your wife has her own real life jungle book

I got some mentally retarded guy this past Tuesday when I saw Pirates. He sat right behind me and had the most cartoony laugh, he also kept saying jack sparrow over and over and said kissy kissy in his weird ass voice any time the people on screen kissed or almost did.

As usual in places where there is a possibility of being near people eating, the worst that can happen to a
decent human being is being near subhumans who eat with their goddamned mouths open.
Really warms my heart in a painful way.

>I beat up a nigger!
>I made an autist cry!
>I got my dick sucked, guys!
>Am I, dare I say it, /ourguy/? XD

I dont go to movies anymore because my dislike of other humans has grown too virulent

Americans trying to pretend they're better than europeans is a pretty pathetic sight.
Tired of dying for israel yet?

I've never walked out of a movie, but I think this would be a case when I would.

Me too, I could snap at any moment and just beat somebody to a pulp who pisses me off even a little.

Faggots are afraid of me, I am exactly like the driver, although nobody has given me a chance to display my bottled up fury.

You guys sound really tough

And as shitty as that might actually be, (21 European countries are still developing), he could be from an even shittier continent, like Asia or South America. Still, considering the level of snobbishness and the propensity of attacking America where it makes little sense, indicating an obsession on his part, he's probably Europrean, an insecure one at that, but that's practically redundant.

>Europrean
American education, everyone.

The stupid kind. The only time it's acceptable to take a child to a kid-friendly showing at the Alamo in my opinion is when the kid is young enough to sleep through loud noises (some infants do), or when the kid is old enough to behave and sit still in the seat. The whole point of their kid-friendly showings is that it's expected you're going to have a disrupted viewing experience, but at $8-$15 a ticket, it's just awful.

That's inexcusable. The theater should know better than that.

Fast and Furious 7 some black woman and her kid kept yapping through the action focused scenes, the kid kept asking the most inane questions and the woman kept narrating what actions should Paul Walker do next.

Conjuring 2, a group of black women kept talking through the build up scenes.

Doctor Strange, some poo in loo asked me can I move to make room for him, so he can sit on the end seat instead of the middle with the seven friends he came with, his breath stuck to my nosehairs for the rest of the day.

Age of Ultron, someone with awful pits sat somewhere around me and disgusted everyone.

Jurassic World, fat guy farted trying to cross over me to get to his seat.

Riddick, someone whipped out their incredibly bright cell phone, someone chucked an orange at him shortly afterward, the rest of the night went on well.

Ant-Man and ASM 2, niggas kept talking.

Dark Knight Rises, chimpspeak during Bane vs Batman.

Transformers 2, a black dude's kid had to use the bathroom and he smacked his lips and rambled about waiting to see some Decepticons n' sheeit, the theatrics were entertaining enough to distract the sewage onscreen

some guy started jerking off in the row behind me when i was 11 during the phantom menace.

I'm typing on a phone and didn't bother to spell check. I'll assume everything else was right, otherwise you wouldn't have corrected something so minor as a single typo, so thanks for confirming the actual content of my post.

>Go to see Public Enemies starring Johnny Depp years ago
>audio in center channel is so fucking muffled and bad you can't understand what anyone is saying
>leave theater and have no idea what the fuck I just watched
It was made worse by the fact that the seats had very little legroom, and I spent the whole time between two of my friends with my knees jammed into the back of the seat in front of me, and the fucker kept rocking his seat back and forth. Complained about the shit audio and got a refund, though.

Also:
>get talked into seeing midnight showing of Thor despite having no interest, since RT scores were super high
>stay up late on a work night to suffer through Natalie Portman's shitty romance crap
There were some dudes just talking through the whole thing a few rows behind me, in normal volume speaking voices. I would have cared more if the movie were any good. There were two other guys that got ejected from the theater early on for being loud and obnoxious and then yelling to the audience as they left "WHO CARES!? THIS MOVIE SUCKS!!!".
They weren't wrong.

Also, also:
>Duplicity in 2009
Just the most fucking bored I've ever been in the most warm and uncomfortable cinema ever. I have no idea why my friends, a group of 20-something males, universally had a desire to see this movie, but I went along because I didn't know anything about it. After it was over I remember being mad at them for thinking it would be good in the first place.

I'm going to milk your ass faggot. You think you're big? Let's see how big you are with a couple rounds from my .45 lodged in your skull. Kinda hard to suck shit when I've blown half your face off. You better watch yourself faggots, I work for the fucking CIA, if I want your body, it's mine. It's that fucking simple. Watch your god damned fucking lips. I have over 30 years military training, I would rip your spine out while raping your fucking father up his dried up old skanky shincter. I would then proceed to bundle up what remains of your tight body and shove my 6 inch cock down your throat and mouth fuck you till my cum oozes from every hole in your body. Watch your fucking back. I'm coming in you.

>Monsters University starts playing
>over halfway through the power goes out
>power comes back on and the movie starts back up, but without sound
>audience is more chill with it than you'd expect
>I can pretty much guess what they're saying and once they get the sound back, it's like we missed nothing

There was also the showing of Pacific Rim where the sound was only coming from some of the speakers. Luckily, I was on the good side and only heard about my friends complaining about it.

Same here, I know that the aberave normie could piss me off with his existstence so I would snap and really beat them into a bloody pulp.
Thats why I avoid people at all costs, its for their own good.

when i went to see that flick with gerard butler and jeniffer aniston. it sounded like a cool action movie from the name but it was a chick flick

Yeah we have a copy of it. It's a hardcover, but it's not signed or a first edition or anything special like that.

Why?

How many more years till your balls drop, pipsqueak

>trying this desperately hard to become the next navy seal pasta

Really sad

should of lynched that nigger in his seat

The elitism on this website is a good thing, without it we would have even more retards like you shitting it up

I bet she has a lot of phone numbers written inside that she calls every weekend