Evening Sir! You seem to be alone?

>Evening Sir! You seem to be alone?
>Are you aware of our no singles policy?

robert? Can I speak to you privately?

Does my falcon count as a partner?

Robert. Dos that apply to woman as well because i identify as a non jewish white woman. I already have my ticket. may I please go find my seat?

ok, i'll just take a crab juice to go then

s-shes in the restroom

Damn Robert!

did you just assume my relationship status?

Oh okay we'll just wait for her to come out. We can't have you roaming the theater alone!

But Robert. I'm meeting my bros inside. This is a RAUNCHY FUN SUMMER R-RATED movie, I'm gona get #Litty

BLACKED

*pulls out big black gun*
Nothing personnel, Bob

Robert, Lane, Jumbo. i brought my turbo goggles and an extra entrance fee anwyay, i can just put my pyramid of crab legs in the free seat, okay? Wha---Robert! There's no need to call security, please, take the money Robert, they're resealing the kinotower foundations, i'll get entombed in asphalt out there robert! PLEASE! PLEASE!

Oh fuck off Lane I'll slit you're throat neck

*teleports behind you completely unclothed*
Heh, you call that gun "BIG"?
*BBC becomes fully erect and your gun becomes flaccid instantly*
You're coming with me kid

I can feel all those white pussies getting wet from here

But Robert I paid for the premium ticket that let's me bypass the no singles policy. Don't you appreciate my business that is supporting your kinotorium?

what a pathetic little fantasy world you all reside in to actually believe anyone but yourselves care about the party size at the cinema

hey robert!

Excuse me but I'm here with my ant lover see?

>you will never inseminate lane.

Why even live??

I come from the mine sir, we lost two of our guys when the sweet popcorn tunnel collapsed. I'm looking for two large bags to gather the popcorn

...

Anyone know about this rumor of the chocolate pits now being available and granting an exclusive singles cube in theaters?

Alone for the matinee again, sir?

why of course, and are you aware of the children labor law robert?

>Sorry, you can't sit there. I'm saving this seat for my husband.

tfw this happened to me this weekend

>strategically took mom to see wonderwoman to avoid the no singles policy
>get there early and have access to good seats
>waiting for movie to start but need to pee
>tell mom i have to use the restroom and to save my seat, she says ok
>go use bathroom
>come back and sit down in seat
>women next to tells me that shes saving the seat for her husband
>look at my mom , expecting her to help me out here
>she says nothing
>i turn back towards the woman and say ok
>have to go sit across the theatre cause all the other seats are taken


who was in the wrong here?

Man, at my old job I'd work 5 days a week but usually at least one of my days off would be a weekday. Going solo to weekday matinees is lit, as long as it's not a kids movie. The only other people are a few random elderly couples who are always super quiet and respectful and sit far in the back, so you get to sit wherever the fuck you want. Man, I miss those, wish I still got weekdays off regularly. Evening and weekend shows are full of loud obnoxious fans and teenagers who text during the movie.

Just take a friend, male or female and if you have no friends take a body pillow, at least then you're not entirely alone.

Depends if you mom or the lady sit down first and your mom informed the lady that she was saving it for her son.

what's that move called?

Dude on the left looks like he has a rape dungeon somewhere

Be careful who you hire, Robert

>guy with Naruto headband on the left
to be quite honest waifu pillow man isn't even out of place in that setting

>im going to have to ask you to leave sir.

He's with his kind now. Life finds a way and all that shit.

It's called VR cinema
Get with the times, get a headset and embrace your incel fate

W-Where are you taking me?

Robert...Lane...HELP!!

>I'll slit you're throat neck
>throat neck
What did he mean by this?

A bit of playful ribbing eh Robert? You know I only enjoy kinos in a completely empty theatre. I pay good money to this establishment for that privilege. Or shall I take my money elsewhere?

I was down there for so long last shift I forgot how blue the sky was. They need to cut shifts a year is just too long.

Is this actually a thing in some backward countries?

Haha indeed sir! It was only a joke no need to inform corporate.

>his third world shithole doesn't enforce the NSP

I saw Logan alone hahaha