What was his fucking problem?

what was his fucking problem?

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He doesn't like people because they are covered by germs.

Jerry did not want a rape allegation on him from random white female #8726363

He didn't want human garbage touching him.

...

>Kramer: Now what's the matter with you Jerry? A young lady tries to hug you and you shun her away like some common street walker? You were her hero, Jerry! Now she's heart broken!
>Jerry: She went in cold! You don't go in cold for a hug! I'm not a hugger! Is that so wrong? To want to live in a world where we can refuse physical contact from strangers?
>Kramer: I can't believe what I'm hearing. I don't even know who you are anymore, Jerry. What kind of ANIMAL refuses a hug from a sweet young lady?
>Elaine: He's right you know Jerry.
>Jerry: Oh boy, here we go.
>Elaine: To reject a woman... in public no less... it's never happened to me, but I can tell you... it's humiliating, Jerry
>Jerry: No! No more! No more hugs, or kisses, or handshakes for that matter! I'm taking it all off the table! I'm taking a stand!
>George: Ha, you should be so lucky... you know the last time a woman tried to kiss me? It's because I'm not a normie. Women these days only want you if you're a Chad.
>Jerry: If you're who?
>George: Chad. You know, tall, good-looking, rich. A woman would never go in cold for a hug for a betamale like me, I can tell you that. Nope! Not happening!
>Kramer: He's right ya know, Jerry. But now that you refused to a hug a girl, you're no longer a normie. OR a Chad.
>Jerry: Not a normie? Then what am I?
>Kramer: You have autism now, Jerry. You're a robot now. You showed your power-level, and now the whole world knows!
>Jerry: But I don't wanna be a robot!

You can't just insist someone hug you. Maybe Jerry has had a no hugs policy after years of people trying to run up and grab him etc.

Or maybe he's just kind of uptight or a 'no touch' kind of guy. Completely his choice.

Or maybe he just didn't like how she came across. Felt contempt or dislike for her. Who knows. Yeah, that would hurt, but that's life, not everyone is obligated to like you.

10/10

this was fucking perfect

>Filthy goyish woman get your paws offa me.

Apparently he's a huge germaphobe and doesn't even like to shake hands with people unless he has antibacterial wipes to clean up with afterwards.

You're good at this.

You should somewhere where you post these up. Like memes of riffs on shows riffing on memes.

9000/10

should *blog / tumblr somewhere where

But really, you completely mastered the Seinfeld formula there, and it was even funny. You probably have a creative gift for picking up on style and writing scenes. You should look into script or comedy writing, or art or something.

brilliant

Didn't want to get contaminated with whatever STDs she's carrying on her week-old salty sweat

He simply did not know who the girl was.

Wow, I could really picture the voices. Good job.

>implying Sup Forums wouldn't have splurged out and refused also

this was so good

Neurotic homosexual.

Yeah, he completely captured each character's 'voice' and psychology. And even the logic and structure of the show itself.

...

Nigger/10

>this shit passed as funny 30 years ago

I guess good humor is a relatively recent thing

To be fair does that look like this? He didn't recognize her and I don't think you'd really let a complete stranger hug you out of the blue.

Previous thread's greentext was better. But have a (you)

She had dick breath.

Actually happened to me once when a qt hot emo girl asked if I wanted to hug and I said no so I wouldn't seem too desperate

How do you like my blog

pit whore

Can imagine his high pitched whingeing there at the end. Daring synthesis.

Nice

I agree. fucking memes

G: What kind of freak just tries to hug random people?
J: I know and I didn't want a hug anyway. Everyone is making a big deal about it, like it makes a difference I refused to hug 'Kesha'
G: YOU refused a hug from Kesha? THE Kesha
J: Yes, haven't you been listening?
G: Well yes, but you never mentioned it was THE Kesha
J: Who the hell is 'THE Kesha"?
G: Have you not heard her smash hit single Tik Tok Jerry?
J:..No-
G: NO?! It's a masterpiece Jerry! And you're telling me you didn't hug that woman!?
J: Ugh, Not you too! I didn't want to hug a stranger! Why is everyone acting as if I hate this woman, I just didn't want a hug!
*Kramer slides in*
K: What's going on, fellas.
G: Jerry didn't want to hug Kesha on the red carpet an-
K: Kesha!? THE Kesha?!
G: I know! That's what I said!
K: Jerry, have you not heard Tik Tok!? It's a masterpiece!
J: . . So I've heard.
K: Do you hate her or something?
J: NO! I Just didn't want the DAMN HUG! Since when is a crime to refuse a hug from someone you don't know!
K: When that someone you don't know is Kesha!

you lost me when George started meme speaking.

cringed. No wonder Larry David said the modern Seinfeld parodies are exclusively for morons.

wow

...

>you'll never catch a whole lot of STDs from prime era kesha

why must we suffer like this

...

Your life must suck.

for posterity

Yeah, because I don't find some guy on the internet funny. Everything else in my life is void because of this. Think before you speak user.

Good shit

>complete stranger interrupts your interview and demands a hug
>jerry thinks he might be autistic

what could possibly go wrong

>Season 10, Episode 01
>The Hug

>lifting shit from leddit

I hope you all feel good about up(you)'ng reddit drivel.

>>Jerry: But I don't wanna be a robot!
This is gold.
Keep going.

youtube.com/watch?v=_V2sBURgUBI

would watch/10, B

It's not funny without the Kesha incident for context. Add that in.

do it yourself lazy prick

Do it right or don' do it at all, you useless cunt. Get the fuck out of my thread.

suck a dick

It's because you're a prick to random people on the internet, not because you don't find them funny.

I know right... how did you like the last season of big bang? I shat my fucking pants when sheldon said that's his chair bazinga

Fuck he's gotten old... I don't want him to die :(

He's a Jew.

Impressive.

it was good until the memes appeared, stop with this shit.