I'm beginning to think that God hates this guy and wants him dead. Or he desperately needs him for something

I'm beginning to think that God hates this guy and wants him dead. Or he desperately needs him for something.

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I'm sure the other hosts will never rag on him about this or anything.

The last time he crashed they said they'd only
bring it up once

And they brought it up a bunch of times. That's the joke.

>God hates this guy and wants him dead
No, it means God keeps saving his life. Same with Farage. He survived pic related in 2010 along with a car crash and two assassination attempts.

He keep crashing and surviving, I don't think god hates him

>two assassination attempts
none for May?! wtf

Compared to the first one this is pretty tame. Apart from the fire of course, but much slower and less head dragging in the dirt.

Lefties want to be Che Guevara. No one's going to be "immortalized" or "martyred" for killing Theresa May, but if someone murdered Nigel Farage I can imagine some of my scumcunt countrymen being glad about it.

>mostly ok
>Considering he was almost a vegetable the last time

>Richard Hammond’s massive accident at a hillclimb venue in Switzerland occurred after the finish line of the competitive section of road.

J U S T

>God the creator of a trillion Suns spends his time flipping British TV presenters cars over.

fucking americans

not really, it was never brought up again on the show. they mentioned it, he came back and that was it. they've talked about it (as has hammond) on talk shows and such but thats it

For an instant I read that as "ARMOND HORROR CRASH" and got sad

>>God the creator of a trillion Suns spends his time flipping British TV presenters cars over.

well of course.

He's on our side

Clarkson always ribbed on Hammond about his ability to drive in a straight line.

>Believes in "heaven"

>God needs a man to die so he can lead the army of heaven
>Satan keeps intervening

Hmm, probably would end up as an Adam Sandler comedy.

I'm just beginning to think he really is a shit driver.

> God hates this guy and wants him dead

YEAH OR MAYBE IT'S JUST DANGEROUS DRIVING INCREDIBLY FAST CARS WHEN YOU'RE A 47 YEAR OLD TV HOST

I can see this show stopping soon after this, whether he lives or not.

They could relegate Hammond to only driving slow cars, a bit like they did with Captain Slow for a while.

God hates every single filthy Brit

>God the creator of a trillion Suns
>cant kill some faggy British guy driving a car

yep, he's an Americunt alright,

>flag waving intensifies

god isnt real better rip that bandaid off now youll thank me later

Well what would you do if you were god?

The thing is that the Top Gear crowd are not exceptional drivers, but they get given very fast cars and drive quite dangerously. Surprised this hasn't happened to Clarkson.

>mocks his co-host for driving safe and slow
>constantly get into accidents
what an arse

of course God isnt real Morty, take a look in the fucking mirror.

>tips fedora

he can actually reach the pedals

burp you're right morty, let's back BAAAARP to Reddit

He's real. If you don't repent you will burn in hell.

Banepost

so God likes to torture people who dont suck his dick? seems a tad immature.

dont forget cancer

Does that mean he's not coming on then

The other two are too fragile to do this sort of shit to drum up headlines, so it's him.

so why would the Creator of a trillion suns and a zillion planets want to set the people of one of these planets on fire again?

fuck not again
youtube.com/watch?v=qNanZBsATk0

Why can't this keep happening to James Corden when he's doing his shitty car karaoke

Jesus, I never realized Sup Forums was so autistic.

Expensive accident

im sure insurance will cover it

They're poor racing drivers, but in terms of safe and legal driving I'd say they're pretty good. Haven't they all had zero points on their license for most of their careers?

Because God is insecure.

kek

L O L
O
L

Why do people kill their own Sims or build suicide coasters in ROLLER COASTER TYCOON?

cunt can't drive for shit obviously ;)

is he the most unkillable motoring related tv presenter other than Guy Martin

youtube.com/watch?v=sjZXaUwYoog

this and the 2010 crash where his bike exploded are insane and I'm pretty sure he's had other crashes

reading Almond(as in Marc from Soft Cell) Horror Crash would make me sad considering his last bike crash destroyed his face

You seem to have forgotten about Chris Evans.

>wtf
We use real words here. Please leave.

>guy literally has a career in driving fast vehicles and doing outlandish stunts
>'Wow isn't it weird how he keeps getting in accidents?'