What kind of man can't protect his own family from a fucking jaguar even with the help of firearms?

What kind of man can't protect his own family from a fucking jaguar even with the help of firearms?

Other urls found in this thread:

youtube.com/watch?v=sIrkxtAq9KA
youtube.com/watch?v=bKpZUsRJWBg
twitter.com/SFWRedditVideos

A dead man.

>tfw you realize those two look just like Elsa and Ana's parents from Frozen
>tfw you realize they too were lost at sea

cucked by a literal gorilla

It was not a jaguar but a leopard which are extremely dangerous and firearms are not what they are now.

they look nothing like them

disney cinematic universe when??

Why does she have gigantic dreadlocks

>implying it hasn't already been happening for years now

Genuinely one of my favorite Disney scenes of all time

youtube.com/watch?v=sIrkxtAq9KA

>Tarzan's father has a fucking testosterone induced beef stache
>Elsa and Ana's pathetic faggot dad looks like a twink with a dirty sanchez

Leopards are the fucking ninjas of the animal kingdom. They mostly hunt at night and they like to sneak really close to their prey before they pounce. You would literally not know you're being hunted until it's too late.

>weird nose
>weak chin
>faggoty grooming habbits

Just add a receding hairline, and he'll be a spitting imagine of British royalty

PUT YOUR FAITH IN WHAT YOU MOST BELIEVE IN

Phil Collins is a god

They're ringlets

Lord Greystoke

all he had was some shitty birdshot that was salvaged from the ship or washed ashore. Cut the man some slack.

Why did their ship catch on fire and how were they the only ones who survived?

He clearly knew enough to expend several rounds. Funny how a leopard that's never even seen a gun knew how to dodge.

Let's write the plot for Frozen 2. I'll start

>Handsome man with dark skin shows up from a far away land
>Has fire magic

because they wanted Tarzan to have them and they couldn't have him get them from his dad because a man in that time period wouldn't have hair like that

Tarzan was a surprisingly brutal movie. His parents and the baby gorilla are mauled to death by a jaguar, Clayton gets a fairly graphic (for a Disney movie) death scene where he accidentally hangs himself.

he probably missed the first shot and gave away any element of surprise.

plus the quarters are small and the jaguar most likely snuck up on them. It's amazing he even lasted that long.

jaguars have the strongest bite force of all cats. they are more dangerous than leopards

big cat fags are gay
OOOH OOH ELSA GETS BLACKED ELSA GETS BLACKED

nu-Disney is the worst

>this is the most unrealistic thing in a movie about a man who was raised by gorillas from almost newborn without being crushed accidentally or some shit, surfs on trees, and overpowers an alpha silverback
>also a man, gorilla, and elephant are best friends
>elephant climbs onto a ship by way of the anchor chain

Probably got within point blank several times too. Either the cat was bulletproof or he was the worst shot ever. I also like how it basically left their bodies intact. Like it wasn't really hunting for food, just kind of dicking around because EVIL CAT.

>Cade has large teeth and will bite hard
>bang
>no more Cade.
Teeth don't matter when bullets are involved

Accidents happen. Maybe a candle tipped over.

Ships carried a lot of flammable stuff

>at the end of the movie he gets hit by a wall of water
>he's white
>wait, a minute, you were just really dirty this whole time?
>yeah, it's ash. I have fire magic
>I can't believe I banged a white guy

yeah if a baby was raised by gorillas he could definitely beat them up, we are the strongest species there is

the treehouse floor wasn't covered with shells. looks like he only had two shots

was probably saving them if life in the jungle didn't work out

Jesus, those things'll tear you to shreds.

He was a cuck just look at his "beard"

>>Elsa and Ana's pathetic faggot dad looks like a twink with a dirty sanchez
No but seriously they are trying to subvert the "masculine male" and make all the men look like twinks.

jaimie pull up leopard mauls chimp.

youtube.com/watch?v=bKpZUsRJWBg
gud enough nigga, i ain't yo bitch.

>needing more than two shots

Doesn't look like he even hit it, as evidenced by the jag having zero injuries. Reminds me of that pilot chick from Alien Covenant that can't hit the neomorph.

dude holy shit calm down you autistic fuck its a disney movie for kids. we can all tell your super hardcore

>What kind of man can't protect his own family from a fucking jaguar even with the help of firearms?
definitely not a virgin from Sup Forums

why could no one shoot? why have guns AND explosives right next to each other?

How does a polar bear know what apples are?

Who cares, he's hot.

he lives in a zoo, they feed him apples a lot. its also possible he doesn't and just likes to munch on ice.

Let's see you try it OP

>Leopards are the fucking ninjas of the animal kingdom
Not real?

>What kind of man can't protect his own family from a fucking jaguar even with the help of firearms?

because he was white

nobody engage him.

Not OP but I've personally seen him accidentally fall into a tiger pit and pop all five tigers in the pit with just his CCW.

You know i love you but i
just
can't
take
this

PURE KINO

ABSOLUTE KINO

Was the video game kino, or is it just my nostalgia?

Conquistador camps would get raided by jaguars.

Them and your father have something in common