I am black. For this reason, I am out...

>I am black. For this reason, I am out. Unless you are also black then at the end of the pitch when you get no sharks ill jump in at the last second.

Other urls found in this thread:

youtu.be/3Dr7XdvEk0k
investors.com/politics/commentary/its-official-clintons-popular-vote-win-came-entirely-from-california/
youtube.com/watch?v=GE__MkdgZHc
twitter.com/NSFWRedditVideo

Shart Tank
A dunk tank but filled with sharts.

I delivered dinner to Mark Cuban a couple months ago, ask me anything

Who's Mark Cuban?

was he nice

anyone know how his garbage can lid company is doing?

No

He was on Joey's world tour

Billionaire
He was. He has an armed guard at the mansion gates who could have easily taken the delivery, but he let me in to the front door of the mansion anyway. His kids answered the door and when he came he complimented my work uniform and tipped $35

I highly doubt he came to the door himself.

youtu.be/3Dr7XdvEk0k

Apparently, he kind of tries to do things normal people would, like go to restaurants to eat wings and watch the game, despite being super rich

Normal people have body guards with them at all times?

Normal people vote democrat? LOL

>$35
wow cheap fuck

well majority voted hillary, so yes.

>48%
>majority

Considering how much he has, maybe, but still my biggest tip to date. It was $15 through the app and $20 cash, which I still have for some reason

If I were rich I'd make you take the first bite
To see if it wasn't poisoned

Always had an irrational hatred for him.

Keep crying cuck. Commiefornia should be nuked.
investors.com/politics/commentary/its-official-clintons-popular-vote-win-came-entirely-from-california/

kek someones triggered i see. facts hurt i guess

>gf of several years "not in love anymore"
>is moving away to be with another dude she met online(lel)
>huge fight, punched walls, broken shit, all around awful drama
>call a cab and send her away
>locked inside the house for a week after
>used sharktank to escape reality and ignore misery

I've associated this show with one of my darker times, I watched not just every episode but also all shark tank related videos on youtube and the other versions of this show, I only stopped watching whenever I would fall asleep exhausted.
A full week of 24/7 shark tank, weed, isolation and self loathing.

>stupid neo-lib doesn't know the difference between majority and plurality

>liberals in charge of knowing majority vs plurality

All US presidents have people who's job it is to do just that. Why wouldn't a billionaire?

That Texan Hawaiian is so based.

I didnt know who it was for until it got there. The name and phone number I got were just for Mark C

Bit of a waste of money. Not all poisons are fast-acting. Better to just force the delivery boy to wait there for the next week and have him killed if you feel ill after eating it.

I always feel like he overdresses to overcompensate for something. He wears things like collar bars and french cuffs while everyone else is like casual Friday in comparison, hell Cuban just shows up in a polo most of the time.

He's in the fashion industry, he doesn't want to look like a slob.

>to overcompensate for something

Yeah but lets be real, he came up with FUBU not some bespoke tailor brand or something.

Did you not notice you were driving up to a giant mansion that a billionaire lived in?

No he was too busy making up this story to notice

Actually, as I was driving, I noticed he lives in Preston Hollow, and then saw the name. The instruction said guard would let me in. Once I got to the mansion, the guard gave me some shit: "you say you have a delivery for 'Mark C??'". Once I was in, he has a stone at the door with the name Cuban and the Mavs logo etched in

That's cool if true. Why wouldn't he just send his guard out to go get some pizza?

I deliver with Favor, and I guess he wanted fried chicken. He ordered from a place 10 min from his house. It's weird because I saw a Dominos car leaving his mansion before I pulled up to the entrance gate

>accidentally reply with a Shark Tank meme to a girl at work
>this fucking qt tells me she loves Shark Tank and starts quoting Mr. Wonderful himself
>she's able to recite exact pitches and has seen every episode at least once
What's my next move bros?

kek

Wowee! A full week?? How'd you manage that?!

>I'm really only here for the publicity. For that reason, I am out.

Offer her a royalty deal

If it doesn't work at least you can use an elaborate "I'm out" line

you are the cuck for letting yourself be tricked into hating part of your own country

Well you have to fuck her after giving your best offer

>I'm in for 5 inches but that's literally the best I can do.

>I'll give you 50,000 sperm cells for 20% equity in your pussy

Shit... i would too if i was black and in his position

>I love you and I love your product but because I don't understand your business or your product or how to sell it outside of QVC I'm out
Lori.jpg

USA USA USA USA USA

>seriously

USA USA USA USA USA USA

>well majority voted hillary, so yes.
kek incoming triggered trumpanzees

Give her a 30 second shot clock.

>I appreciate your offer Cubes

STREAM FUCKING WHEN

Is it time for some O'Leary posting?!

BASED KEVIN
A
S
E
D

tfw its a 'rob gets cucked' episode

STREAM
T
R
E
A
M

Look. I'm not the most tech savoy person like Mark here, have the best manufacturing infrastructure like Daymon, or the selfishness of Kevin over there as he drinks pre World War 1 red wine but what I can do for you is that I will go Kite Surfing with you on weekends. We can bond and be best friends. I'm not investing in your product but for your friendship. I'm willing to offer you the same amount but for less of a share because I'm just desperate for a friend and you can't buy a friend out of Mark, Daymon, or Kevin for that price. As for Lori over there do you really want to be friends with her?

You've got a deal Lori!

A long time ago as a young man I was walking through Central Park by my lonesome. It was a beautiful night, light sounds of the city passing by, but otherwise quiet. As I strolled throughout the park toward my apartment I heard the muffled sounds of a woman screaming, and just a few yards away from me I came across a half nude woman with two men on top of her. We briefly made eye contact and I could see a look of complete desparation in her gaze, a call for help. I kept on walking. Her muffled screams got louder as she realized that there was no hero of this story, no one to save her from the arms of the men viciously having their way with her. She was a lost cause. I knew that even if I tried to help her there was nothing I could do to stop those men. Your strategy has yet to show ANY inkling of a profit, and frankly, your product has no market. You are that woman I couldn't help. And because of that, I'm out.

I don't actually have that much money and definitely cant invest in anything unless it's very cheap and for that reason im out

The last episode I saw of this show he jumped in a saved this giant meathead named "White Rhino" with a shitty cooler.
youtube.com/watch?v=GE__MkdgZHc

Have you ever drank a glass of black rhinoceros blood? Of course not, I was just being colloquial to start this story with an anecdote. The first time I had a glass I was in South Africa, taking a celebratory drink in Johannesburg after completing a successful hunt. You see, in South Africa they don't hunt lion, or elephant. We hunted a more dangerous game: the kaffir, or black man. I finally had a 7 year old boy cornered in an Oingo Bongo merchandise warehouse when the thoughts passed through my mind: Should I pull the trigger? Can I ever come back to who I was before this moment? I pulled the trigger, made my first 100 million dollars. Mr. Johnson, this is something you need to ask yourself: can I pull the trigger on this deal and make thr right choice? 10% funding for 85% ownership and prima nocte rights to your daughters.

DID I MENTION QVC!?

Nice blog, faggot.

I'm in and for that reason i'm out.

As a young child I saw my Mother relentlessly beaten by my Father. I can still recall hearing her muffled screams through the walls of my bedroom as I lay trying to fall asleep. Some nights were worse than others, but I remember the mornings my Grandmother would take me to school because my Mother couldn’t be seen in public. She would wear sunglasses and long sleeve shirts for weeks while the bruising and swelling slowly healed around her eyes and arms. I never understood how something as simple as an overcooked meal or spilt glass of wine in the living room could send my Father into these inexplicable fits of rage; not until this very moment. Not until I saw your presentation. You are the stain on my fathers Afghan rug and I see no club soda nor salt to scrub you away. For an investment of 250,000 dollars I will retain 92% of your company with a lifetime of royalties and if you even for one second glance in Lori’s direction, I will personally crucify each of your children.

That blonde girl almost creamed herself

Let me give you some advice. Do not go into retail. It is a savage place. Last year I invested in the toy business KinderKids. If my marketing specialists did their job you have never heard of them. You see I was competing for retail space with Mattel. To flush me out they replaced the plastic we used with lead. Over a thousand children died. Like I said, it is a savage place. Of course in response I used my influence with Mattel to have all children's products shipped with one adult Brazilian Wandering Spider. The casualties are are still climbing to this day. When I look at you I do not see someone capable of making these kinds of tough business decisions.
And for that reason, I'm out.

uber

>it's a Kevin and Mark gang up on Robert episode

Does anyone else want to cum in Lori?

Did they hire the same editor from kitchen nightmares? those fucking sound effects man

>but it's okay because the pitchers brought a dog

fuck this guy
bring back ashton kutcher!

G E T O U T

>only 50k for 33% of the business
is this guy fucking stupid?

remember your valuation Sup Forums!

if you are seeking $200,000 in exchange for 15%, what do you value your company at?

$300 according to lots of the people that go on

>meathead
Why do I have such a power over user? I singlehandedly made cringe posting popular as well as insufferable and meathead.

Just saying, I'm flattered to be desu.

1.35 mill

but mr. wonderful says a business is only worth 6x cash flow

Ugh, I just scan for rug, rape or oingo boingo and kinderkids and know to skip these posts.

Meathead is a term people use when speaking about large muscular mean. You didn't create it. I also don't really see posts on Sup Forums specifically memeing the term up. What the fuck are you on about?

That guy oozes pretentiousness.

LOL IM A MILLENNIAL TOO GUYZ

What's the best episode? Or at least your favorite? Bulletball doesn't count.

>letting yourself be tricked into hating part of your own country
tricked?

Don't get defensive, just use it. Have fun, you're welcome.

>girl

For what? What did you do? I'm sincerely asking?

Just enjoy. I know you are trying to help me get some well deserved recognition, but please, sir... Don't mention it.

WE WUZ FUBU N SHIET

>trannies, illegals, blacks, gays, democrats
>normal people

>That one time Ashton Kutcher was on the show
He was fine enough but it was kind of pointless desu, maybe if they had guest sharks often

checked and kekked

I know the guy who invented the pavlok. I guess he was on an episode of shark tank. Anybody here see it?

>Mfw the whole scrub daddy segment
>My fucking face during the whole ordeal
What in the fuck was all of that, it was ridiculously overpriced.

What the fuck are you on about? 35 dollars is a great tip for delivering a pizza.

Just because a guys is rich doesn't mean he owes the delivery guy part of his fortune.

Gave me a bit of a chuckle.

Which is all we can really ask for in this workaday world of ours.