ITT: predict how you would perform in a war against your neighbors

ITT: predict how you would perform in a war against your neighbors.

Russia: not much to do, I think we could conquer St. Petersburg temporarily for a few months without help.

Norway: pretty hard to invade since their soil is rough but we would win in six months or so.

Sweden: they have good navy and air force, but Finland would win in few months by attacking from north with a great reserve. They have no enough manpower to even think about invading us.

Estonia: war would be over in a week or so when Tallin is occupied, their defense is a joke.

Other urls found in this thread:

youtube.com/watch?v=Zqb58cSE7Z0&t
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Russian_naval_facility_in_Tartus
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Russian_military_bases_abroad#Current_bases
twitter.com/SFWRedditImages

>I think we could conquer St. Petersburg temporarily for a few months without help.
You can't be serious

>Brazil couldn't singlehandedly-destroy Argentina in a week
TOP KEK ARGENIGGER PIG SHIT!!! Oh believe you me, us Brazilians are ITCHING for a war with Argentina. We will fucking ANNIHILATE your dirty country. There wouldn't be a square meter of Argie soil that has running water, electricity, or petrol that isn't on fire, once our airforce and navy is done bombarding your defenseless country. Then, our army boys (we'd send the niggers and other mongrel races first) would swoop in, raping your women, and killing EVERY Argentine pig shit they see. When Brazil's done with you, we will have committed acts of genocide. Of course no one is gonna do shit about it

Afaik Russia has something like 2 million professional soldiers at the ready at any given time in addition to their reserve of tens of millions. We would be made to surrender withing days.

Their arsenal and tactics are India-tier, they just have population.

Canada is nothing. Mexico can probably put up a decent fight, but not much.
Russia is a even fight. The last time our military even fought a war on such a cold front like Alaska or Eastern Russia, was in Korea, over 60 years ago.

>2 million professional soldiers

Wrong, it's 10 times less.
Our groud forces are very small, we have only 220.000 of active personell.

Any western nation (or batics): 60% of our troops run away and beg that country for asylum, the remaining troops are being used as cannon fodder (as usual) until the enemy runs out of ammo, then the US troops and their military tech arrives and we got btfo anyway.
Ex soviet -stan countries, ukraine and belarus: russua wins in a matter of days unless America decides to help ukraine.
Japan: we got btfo by America.
China: considering russia has barely any troops staitioned in the east and our population is just too low compared to the enemy we got btfo.
North Korea: russia would win in less than a week.

Of course it's what would happen if russia's not is not using nukes. But the moment russia launches a single nuke we got destroyed from all sides since America has missile containing bases literally everywhere.
Honestly, russia's only strenght is the fact that it posseses such a huge nuclear arsenal but it serves only to make sure that attacking russia just is not worth it, they won't ever be used in an actual fight. Realistically russia us quite weak. Even fighting a few amateurs in Syria is too costly for russia, not to mention that all that campaign just proves how weak russian military actually is and that no one is really afraid of starting a war with russia.

>2 million professional soldiers
those are not professionals though, not even close to that. they are just conscripts (majority of them) and also those who are currently studying to become officers are also included in that number for some reason

>russua wins in a matter of days

You pathetic faggots can't even defeat Ukraine fighting it for 4 years, I bet even Moldova could single-handedly kick your ass.

in summary: Finland has the best army in the world

TOP KEK RUSSIAN PIG SHIT!!! Oh believe you me, us Kazakhs are ITCHING for a war with Russia. We will fucking ANNIHILATE your dirty country. There wouldn't be a square meter of ruskii soil that has running water, electricity, or petrol that isn't on fire, once our airforce and navy is done bombarding your defenseless country. Then, our army boys (we'd send the uzbeks and other mongrel races first) would swoop in, raping your women, and killing EVERY russki pig shit they see. When Kazakhstan's done with you, we will have committed acts of genocide. Of course no one is gonna do shit about it

Russia is not in a war with ukraine. Yes russia does support separatists in easteen ukraine but it is not the same as waging a direct war.

>ireland
pfft
>wales
pffffft
>scotland
>pffffffft

>france
actually a pretty even match
i dunno

2bh i just forgot about kazakhstan lel.

Keep sucking that russian cock even harder putin drone.

We could destroy anyone in a week, except for argenigga, which would take a little longer and France, which would destroy us

Actually, during the right time of year (fully manned mechanized brigade) we could certainly take St. Petersburg in a few days. Russia has fuck-all troops in the Karelian Isthmus.
Later we'd get fucked up as they mobilize an armored division from Moscow and retake it, but taking St. Petersburg is certainly possible. Just no point in it when we'd lose the war afterwards.
Sweden would fold quickly, Estonia would be impossible though. We don't have the sealift capacity to bring any number of troops over.

We wreck everyone but the UK tbqh

the mighty simo sniper spirit! you could maybe not surrender for a week or two but that’d be it

ahahaha
the joke about taking St petersburg, ahahahahaha? Right

even India would fuck you guys over like forever

in. any scenario
burgers win against russia every time mate

hahahahahaha, wins the thread

France: not much to do, I think we could conquer Paris temporarily for a few months without help.

>All of our neighbors
We'd fucken destroy them.

History has shown that we can invade every neighbor in weeks, the only country which can be taken seriously is France.

one single simo häyhä could pretty much take over the world so do the math

Uruguai - > We would destroy them as if they were nothing. To be honest, Cisplatina already belong to us, so whatever.

Paraguay - > Paraguay is a meme. We would fuck them twice if needed.

Bolivia - > Although I don't understimate Bolivia, they couldn't beat us, since we have a LOT more combat vehicles, manpower and training.

Peru - > They have some good tanks, but we do as well and in bigger number. We would beat them too.

Colombia - > An adversary to fear. Although they don't have our military power in number/technology, their infantary is formidable, since they're always in war against FARC and another militial groups. We would win because our huge numbers, but I don't know.

Venezuela - > A lot of good tanks, good infantary and patriotic people. They COULD beat us, but again, is uncertain because we still have the most powerful army of Latin America.

Guiana, Suriname and whatever - > Shit tier. We could beat them together in two weeks.

All Central American countries with exception of Mexico are shit tier too. But Mexico might be the only country that could beat us in an open war. They have a huge naval power. But it's considerable open to discussion, since tey don't have any relevant combat airship. I suppose we could lose to them in the right circunstamces.

Forgot Argentina. They would be a tough adversary and give us a fight, but couldn't beat us.

>tactics
>mattering in the modern era
it's all about numbers m8. The Russians absolutely wreck you.

And I'm confused. Since when have Russia or India been known to have bad tactics?

SWEDEN NEEDS TO BE ELIMINATED

>Turkey
Fug, we dead, pls be gentle komshi Xddd
>Gayreeks
They have a bigger army and are ready for war. They have better weapons and will win in all likelihood.
>Monkeydonia
Haha, free clay, Bulgaria is whole again.
>Serves
Tossup.
>ROMAnia
Maybe we can hold them at the river.

>Russia is not in a war with ukraine.

Otherwise Ukrainian troops would've been in Moscow in April 2014.

SWEDN WILL PAY

>I think we could conquer St. Petersburg temporarily for a few months without help
I honestly can't stop laughing. Finland makes the best threads.

All our neighbours are defeatable. We're the regional super power. The biggest challenge is Finland but they are a couple of decades behind us in technology. The danes are pretty good but simply have a smaller military than us. The rest of the nordics are non-countries.

am i a brainlet or what
i don't understand this picture

they all die

answer is 2

France: we would get fucked so fast
Portugal: easy win
Morocco: easy win

(All are with no allies and no nuclear option)

If invaded by:
>Russia
Hard to say, most likely a draw or limited surrender with any concessions favouring Russia
>France
Hard to say, most likely a draw or limited surrender with any concessions favouring France
>Denmark
We would win
>USA
We would probably win in the end but only after great loss and destruction

If invading:
>Russia
We lose
>France
We lose
>Denmark
Hard to say, Canada could probably take Greenland and hold it
>USA
We lose

>Russia: not much to do, I think we could conquer St. Petersburg temporarily for a few months without help.
Why st. Peterrsburg? There is nothing there.

Anyways.

Suomi: shit hole, we can nuke it in few hours.
Ukraine: shit hole, we can nuke it few hours.
China: veerry big shit hole, it will take days to nuke it.
Mongolia: it's pointles to nuke it as Mongolia is absolutely empty, no one lives there.

>Even fighting a few amateurs in Syria is too costly for russia, not to mention that all that campaign just proves how weak russian military actually is and that no one is really afraid of starting a war with russia.
Syria was a playground for testing new weapons. Both Russia and the US did that there.

>y. There wouldn't be a square meter of ruskii soil that has running water, electricity, or petrol that isn't on fire

Good luck setting running water on fire. BTW be careful, you can set ocean on fire the whole planet will burn to ashes.

>History has shown that we can invade every neighbor in weeks, the only country which can be taken seriously is France.
History shows that Germany lost all of the wars they started.

Sweden: we get steamrolled
Finland: we get steamrolled
Russia: we get steamrolled
Latvia: we get steamrolled until Tartu (but keep the north)

>India
We're fucked
>Burma
Retarded nationalists think we could beat them. Burma has far better equipment, though we have more manpower and Burma has so many insurgent groups to handle.

Russia: we'd get fugged breddy fast
Sweden: would become a stalemate
Finland: stalemate like sweden

>Hungary
Total air superiority, drop paratroopers on bridges on the Tisza river and occupy Budapest in 2 weeks maximum.
>Serbia
This is tough as Serbs are stubborn adversaries, maybe 1 month of guerilla warfare.
>Bulgaria
The same as Hungary, maybe harder on the Danube in first phase but not a problem.
>Ukraine
Hard mode. Maybe if they make a huge mistake...
>Moldova
24 hours

>I think we could conquer St. Petersburg temporarily

>be eBinland
>cross the border
>got nuked
>there's no Binland anymore

Singapore: heh...
Thailand: block their gulf and rush b towards Bangkok
Indonesia: oh boy...

>New Zealand
pssh... nothin personnel kid
>Papua New Guinea
Noice
>Indonesia
Can't we just talk about this for a moment?
>France
err

triggered much ivan?

He didn't say that we could beat the uk, usa or your mighty commieblock hole. relax

he got a point, you guys are eternal losers

They've beated French sometime. Not technically a victory, though, because, you know, it's French.

Take it easy, Hans, I just make fun of ze germans. BTW have you ever been told that your sense of humour is sub par?

but you're not funny

It's because you are French.

We've never lost a war against any of our neighbors, except Denmark, and we paid them back tenfold. I don't see why now should be any different.

>I think we could conquer St. Petersburg temporarily for a few months without help.
Kek sure you could

>belgium
piece of cake, would steamroll in a week
>germany
Would be hard, but ive seen how the bundeswehr trains vs how our military trains. and were way superior. we could capture rheinland and hold that until we get crushed by mobilized forces.
>UK
we would just get a naval blockade going, but they would win because trade wouldnt be possible anymore.

We would rekt everyone easily, except the United Kingdom (nuclear power) and Switzerland (mountains full of armed people).

Not sure what is the current state of the German army though.

France borders Brazil too

HAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA, last time it took us just 4 days to make you surrender.

>youtube.com/watch?v=Zqb58cSE7Z0&t

Lel no. Syria is literally the only russia's ally left in the middle east (iran can't decide if they are with russia or not). Also one of a few russia's military bases abroad is also in syria
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Russian_naval_facility_in_Tartus
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Russian_military_bases_abroad#Current_bases
If russia loses syria it will be literally kicked out of the middle east completely. And russia miserably fails to secure its position.
Syria may be a playground for America but for russia it's almost as important as crimea.

>occupy Budapest in 2 weeks maximum
Expect full scale partisan warfare in the mountainous ares neighbor. We will put bomb under every scrap metal by the street and every horse vagina.
You will not be safe.

...

>2018, year of the Frog-Huehue War

Sounds good desu

I don't think anyone would stand a chance except France, they would probably nuke us.

>we’ll take your land
>o-o-okay..

Lobster War 2.0

Canada would put up a decent fight against the US. Our military is small but all of our soldiers have special forces-tier training.

This is so true we won that war. Soviet Union Lost.

Also Poland. They would steal your tanks and shit and sell it to Ukraine

>Canada would put up a decent fight against the US

>Ex soviet -stan countries, ukraine and belarus: russua wins in a matter of days unless America decides to help ukraine.
Sure this is why russian army is in Kiev already...oh wait.

All of our land neighbors have no serious military.
The only interesting one is UK. Assuming we don't use nukes, we're pretty much equivalent so it's probably gonna end up in a stalemate with both sides waiting for each other at the channel tunnel.

My dad would beat your dad

US: not much to do, I think we could conquer Alaska temporarily for a few months without help.

ahem. sorry, neighbors. you are dust. and into dust you shall return.

That was barely enough to bury your dead

>tactics
>not mattering in the modern era

>it's all about numbers m8

You got no idea what you talking about

>m-muh K/D ratio..

you both have substantial muslim fifth column, would be interesting to test their loyalties.

>I think we could conquer St. Petersburg temporarily for a few months without help.

Keep dreaming, Jussi

It isn’t because we’re not in a war with kievstan. it’s Ukraine whose national identity revolves around russia, not the other way around

>It isn’t because we’re not in a war with kievstan.
Funny, no war but gruz 200 goes from Ukraine to Russia everyday.

You can take russia with bare hands. They talk tough but Russians are soft faggots. They bluff a lot just like in the cold war. But they are even weaker now than the Soviet Union. And you can't just gulag them to force them to fight to the last drop of blood like in WW2.

i haven’t seen any, have you?

I'd say that's something

Looking at yout death/gain ratio


But yes USSR won the war

It was embarrassing and was one of reasons Hitler decided to open second front and attack USSR before he dealth with UK.

>half of this thread

>not much to do, I think we could conquer St. Petersburg temporarily for a few months without help
Take your meds please.

desu

You talking with indian immigrant.

They won because Stalin kept sending more and more peasants to die until the enemy ran out of bullets.

>Germany
pretty sure they have secret off buttons for those Leos they gave us so a loss
>Czechia and Slovakia
we 'invade' and have a beer together to celebrate invasion
>Ukraine
we would btfo them
>Belarus
we would btfo them if russia doesn't get involved
>Lithuania
btfo
>Russia
they would btfo us
TOP KEK RUSSIAN PIG SHIT!!! Oh believe you me, us Poles are ITCHING for a war with Russia. We will fucking ANNIHILATE your dirty country. There wouldn't be a square meter of ruskii soil that has running water, electricity, or petrol that isn't on fire, once our airforce and navy is done bombarding your defenseless country. Then, our army boys (we'd send the gypsies and other mongrel races first) would swoop in, raping your women, and killing EVERY russki pig shit they see. When Poland's done with you, we will have committed acts of genocide. Of course no one is gonna do shit about it

Not indian. He is a shitskin from middle east

>more and more and more and more and more and more
the ussr lost merely 0.1% of its population and gained land that we still own to this day

Well look again there is whole google of proofs.

>Since when have Russia or India been known to have bad tactics?
The soviets had brilliant tacticians but then Stalin killed them in the great purge. Their military really suffered as a consequence of this.