This power doesn't make any sense

This power doesn't make any sense.

be prepared for the
>comics and cartoons
responses

What do you propose as an alternative?

>comics and cartoons

Alien phisiology, nigga, ain't gonna explain shit

Yes it does. Hes basically a solar panel. He takes in sunlight but he can release it as well.

which one

But flight does?

>comics are fun, shush

Which one? Emitting concentrated beams of thermal energy from his eyes, being able to fly without any means of propulsion, or that he can balance a large object weighing thousands of tons with his hands without punching through it like a needle through styrofoam?

He's got everything human but to a super degree. It makes sense.

so you can make stuff kinda warm by looking at it?

space ripper stingy eyes

>so you can make stuff kinda warm by looking at it?

Just your mom's pussy.

You know how cat-eyes reflect light to enhance night-vision?
Well Superman shoots lasers from his eyes. Fuck your cats

Point to user. And may I say, in all my years of adjudicating internet debates, rarely have I ever seen so fine a use of the Your Mom reversal.

>it's okay that he can fly with no means of propulsion
>it's okay that his body has physically impossibly high tensile strength given his mass
>it's okay that he can breath freezing vapor
>it's okay that he has a personal force field
>it's okay that he can output more energy than he absorbs even if he has perfect efficiency given his surface area and power source (solar radiation), effectively making him a perpetual motion machine
>it's okay that he can move faster than the speed of light


>but shooting lasers out of his eyes is too crazy

solar irradiance on earth is about 1.3kW/m^2, meaning he'd need an exposed surface area of 1000 square meters just to get a single burst of eye beams at the same power as the YAL-1's COIL system, or he'd need to store the energy over time (which would either make him heavy or hot, or both) through an unknown means

to get eye beams as powerful as Zod's in Man of Steel, he'd need to emit about 80MW (sufficient to instantaneously boil all the water in a human body, causing that explosive effect) which would require either a surface area of 80m^2 or storage of a far greater amount of energy in some other form

to fly, since he's what, 6'2" and stacked, he'd probably weigh about 130kg; that's going to require 1300 Joule to move him 1 meter; the actual method of propulsion is immaterial - this is the energy cost of moving that mass that far under textbook conditions

compare that to his eye beams; 1 watt of power is equivalent to 1 Joule of energy being transferred per second; at 80MW, he's effectively transferring 80,000,000 Joules in a single burst (possibly more if the bursts are shorter but still as effective)

absorbing that energy would take, under ideal conditions (ie in constant full sunlight, given an average surface area of 1.9m^2 and assuming his clothing does not block sunlight at all and thus all light wavelengths are capable of being absorbed by his body - because remember, he's absorbing it all, and we haven't even discussed wastage) about 9 hours and be emitted in a single burst of a second in length

flying 1 kilometer would expend about 1,300,000J, equivalent to about 1300kW or about 9 minutes in full sun; this takes no account of acceleration or deceleration costs, maneuvers, or anything else like carrying a passenger or another mass

sunlight does not sufficiently account for Superman's energy expenditures, nor does any human food he might eat

lol who pumps his car's tires?

>logic
>comics
pick one

Nice rebuttal.
But obviously he has some internal fusion capabilities or taps into some other universal force.

Obviously he doesn't expend chemical energy to fly either.
Somehow he warps gravity itself.

Better find a phd physicist to talk to about this shit.

The raw sunlight energy is metabolized by his ballsack through unique kryptonian enzymes within his hormones and semen. The hornier he gets the quicker, and stronger the energy produced is. This is why he is always shown as better than Supergirl. Her ovaries do are not as good of a catalyst for her powers, as Superman's testicles. Remember if Superman fucked a human woman, she would sie, so he suffers from severe blue balls, thus the title
>Big Blue Ball Sack
which was misheard as
>Big Blue Boyscout

I wonder what would happen if Lex just aimed for superman's balls with a red-sun coated kryptonite bullet that would be undetectable to even Superman himself, would the resulting blast kill everyone alive or what?

He is ejaculating the heat stored in his body out of his eyes.

...

>Complementing someone on a "Your mom" joke
What are you, fucking gay?

Superman would dodge the bullet, bust a nut, write a book, and have a conversation with Flash about how they should train Wonder Woman sometime when Invisible Man doesnt already have his dick her snatch, before the bullet ever left the chamber. However, you have to remember that the raw energy in his ball sack makes his ballsack the strongest part of his body, so even if it did hit him, it shouldnt penetrate.
Also
>Implying Supes doesnt already have a tweeked veraion of Metallo for ballbusting purposes
He would just nut Lex's eyebrows off.

"Adults struggle desperately with fiction, demanding constantly that it conform to the rules of everyday life. Adults foolishly demand to know how Superman can possibly fly, or how Batman can possibly run a multibillion-dollar business empire during the day and fight crime at night, when the answer is obvious even to the smallest child: because it's not real."
-Grant Morrison

this motherfucker can literally fly and you're mad he can discharge the metabolized solar energy in his cells as focused beams from his eyes?

All of Superman's powers are different expressions of the psychic field that is around every cell in his body.

He could will his snot to cure skin cancer if he wanted to.

That other user fucked up, Kryptonians don't just soak light, they're radiation absorbers. So all the junk the Sun is radiating is what you need to account for and it's why his powers work just fine even at night.

That makes sense. His balls are actually fusion generators, fusing sunlight particles (or sarticles) into laser particles (larticles), which are emitted as exhaust through his eyes. At lower frequencies, he can leverage the larticles for propulsion through the air by emitting them directly from his ballsack.

So every time Superman is flying, he's ejaculating lasers. Strange, but science.

No, I'm fucking your mom.

Absorbing and radiating energy is one thing, but I always liked to think his eyes were so super-strong that he could flex his irises in such a way that they reflect pinpoint laser beams of light.

I remember lurking comicvine forums to see how much of a bunch of fags they are and found this big thread with two self proclaimed space scientist title saying its actually possible for Superman to exist and not Goku.

>muh comics need more realism

Its a fucking comic, about people in spandex flying, fighting aliens, demons and shit

I can post a power that makes even less sense.

Harold

Originally, his heat vision was a byproduct of his X-Ray vision through focusing his perception. Which makes sense as X-Rays become lasers when focused and get hot as fuck.

The hottest X-Ray laser currently tested (the LCLS) has heated matter to 3.6 million degrees Fahrenheit (2 million degrees Celsius).

Your math is off. Nice try in trying to impress Mongolian basket weaving board.

Superman is a fictional character. Don't overthinking it.

I say that Most of his powers can be explained by tactical telekenisis force field

those being
>super strength
>super jump
>flight
>invulnerability
>heat vision (increasing particle movement till he makes the air red hot)

I don't understand freeze breath and x-ray vision.

You're forgetting to take into account the Quasi-dimensional sentient story-people that oversee the DC universe and tweak physics to make event in their universe more interesting.

It's Spider-Magic.

Lazy writing is not magic.

>freeze breath
If you super-pressurize air it gets incredibly cold, so he condenses the air within his lungs before breathing it out

>Remember if Superman fucked a human woman, she would sie,
That isn't actually canon, you know that right?

This guy got it. Heat vision is just Superman releasing his stored solar energy in a concentrated form. It's one of his most powerful moves, but it's also the most draining for Superman to use.

It's the reason why I thought the Super Flare was such a neat concept. The idea that Superman can expel all of the solar energy in his cells at one time in a single-use only desperation move that leaves him completely powerless for 24 hours.

Ah, Silver Age, It's a shame comic writers have become so lazy, Wolverine's admantium claws used to make more sense too before the boneclaw retardation.

Weapon X had it that his healing factor was constantly trying to heal (dissolve) the admantium on his bones and as a consequence the admantium was in a near liquid state while inside his anatomy. This meant that he could pop his claws regardless of his wrist position, and that the admantium nubs he used to have on the top of his hands were there as part of an internal cutting device, used to slice his skin and at the same time flatten the admantium into claw-like blades as the metal was ejected out and instantly cooled in the air. The spikes Logan has in all his classic art aren't more claws, they are bits of liquid admantium his healing factor is rejecting but cannot penetrate out of his consonantly healing skin because only the admantium wrist nubs can keep his skin cut long enough.

Now though, all that is forgotten for the sake of "fuck you comics", and you get retards constantly joking about how Logan's claws are too long for his wrists and that they would break his wrists if he pops claws while his wrists were bent.

Alas.

Though Batman really wouldn't have air in his tires anyway. If he really has all the money necessary to make custom planes and rocket cars than it would stand to reason he would have solid state F1 racing tires on his Batmobile which don't need air and cannot become flat.

>wrist claws
Completely retarded just make his fingers mutate into adamantium claws then turn back to normal when hes not fighting. Every other being that can generate claws mutates their fingers into dagger like claws.

Hello Tod, I remember Ripclaw too, WildKats sucked.

I'm posting it guys

point-counterpoint:

Fuck you.

He actually superheats the fluid in his eye and shoots it out of his retina. It's super painful but he heals.

He was born with a micro black hole in his abdomen.

Eyes are life a magnifying glass
since he absorbs solar energy put it together

so

Eye Volcanoes.

Oh yeah, smart guy? Then explain how the Batmobile broke a wheel, letting Joker get away?

This

I remember some "study" that showed flies will move to avoid danger even before that danger is apparent. I assume spiders have something similar.

did he actually say that? smartest thing I've seen attributed to him

the sun emits a specific wavelength that, when striking certain crystal structures in kryptonian skin, causes a resonance and local disruption in reality and allows superman to absorb energy directly from the warp

there you go

superman is an agent of chaos

The consequence of solid state racing tires is that they do "break". Run to their utmost they rip and disintegrate. So "breaking a wheel" is apt as a description.

But disintegrating over heated tires is better than suffering a flat in a race and rarely happens anyway due to regular pitch exchanges.

superman wasn't born with his powers, they took years to develop. Once he stored enough sunlight in his body to leave the atmosphere, he could have flown closer to the sun, magnifying the amount of solar energy he was exposed to by a million times. Boom, enough energy to fuel his powers for life.

None of his powers make any sense. I know that the "don't think too hard about it" response is lazy, but that's the only thing you can do with superhero comics or else you end up with a bunch of faggots dressed in grey armored jumpsuits making fun of colorful costumes or smug assholes mocking capes because "lol so inconvenient I'm so smart for noticing!". So please just don't think too hard about it.

>solar panel

No no no. Yellow sunlight merely *activates* his Kryptonian mental and physical abilities. This "solar panel/solar battery" stuff is 100% jive, yo.

How does he aim it if he can't see?

compressing gasses causes them to release heat.

expanding gasses absorb heat and make things cold.

Low-grade precognition.

Just like spiders.

Can't put as much force behind them that way.

>admantium was in a near liquid state while inside his anatomy

What?

Exactly what it sounds like, his healing factor was always fighting the admantium, making it liquid because it could not be destroyed or metabolized, the metal was always in a state were it was being broken down but his healing factor wasn't strong enough to totally do the job, because that shit is indestructible.

/thread

Already posted here: without the visual

If the adamantium was liquid inside his body, how could it possibly be solid enough to make his bones unbreakable?

If adamantium is liquid in his body how the fuck does he keep his body shape?

Near-liquid state, it's malleable, like a warm pleasing non-Newtonian fluid around his bones

Besides, humans are mostly water around our bones and our skin seems to do fine keeping us in-shape.

Where are you getting this?

His powers don't even make sense

If Superman has x-ray vision, do the people he x-rays get cancer?

>solid state F1 tires
Tires used in F1 still have air in them, and still blow out on occasion. Definitely not Batmobile-suitable.

Cartoon Physics.

Then why is Superman fleeing to the sun to be "recharged" after getting his ass kicked such a common occurrence in Superman stories?

How is he even able to do this?

There was an actual panel that explained it in one of the ancient X-books, I have it, somewhere.

Not like it matters though. He lost his admantium and got it back when he turned into a Horseman for Apocalypse for a bit. So those old rules are meaningless because his new admantium was given through Apoc's Celestial tech and didn't even work under those rules anyway as a retcon for explain away the issues with the old shit.

Some of them still have air, others don't.

Those tires definitely aren't used in F1, and definitely wouldn't be able to handle any kind of high lateral G's. Those tires would give you a Batmobile about as fast and agile as a construction tractor.

The dumbest part of Supes laser eyes is the fact he can manipulate it, he cant control EM radiation so how the fuck is he changing the direction or frequency of the IR rays emitted from his eyes? He shouldnt thats what because he cant control EM radiation meaning the IR rays should be stuck on the IR setting and only be able to move in straight lines, all Supes can do is increase the heat of the IR rays as reducing the heat while using it is impossible unless you can manipulate EM radiatioin so all he can do is heat up his beams or stop using them then fire them again if they are too hot. Also the beams are red because thats infrared rays hes shooting out at you MEANING INVISIBLE so the capeshit beings that react to lazers thats a load of shit and the writers forgetting his lasers are invisible.

Next dumb thing is Super Flare, he release hurr durr solar energy, ok but what the fuck is solar energy anyway? Star energy? Since when can this guy manipulate the energy of stars? Oh right never Solar Flare should just be Supes releasing an intense concentraton of IR rays in every direction and like the eye beams he cant control it once he releases it.

Last I heard Hancook is pushing them with different tweel setups.

I assume he is able to pressurize liquid in his eyeballs and then create small openings in his pupils, eventually creating two fluid jets strong enough to cut through steel.

>Krypton has atmosphere
>Superman can stay in space without suffocating. Everytime Supes opens his mouth in space he should die since pressure physics dictates that all of that air in your lungs is going to come out of you through the mouth in that moment leaving you deprived of air and on a one way ticket to brain death.

Pretty sure someone who can fly through a planet or sit inside the core of the sun has the durability not to have that happen.

Durability dont mean shit to biology user once his cells are deprived of oxygen hes fucking dead..

>Durability don't mean shit to biology

He's biologically durable enough to withstand the rigors of space, Superman is a waterbear, deal with it.

none of his powers make sense for a number of reasons but i can really understand why his laser and xray make no sense btw not OP

yeah that is true except when hes breaking the laws of physics

Its a basic insect instinct. It just leaves out the whole "having eyes that can see 180 degrees" part. Why do you think a fly moves before you even swing to kill it? That's essentially Spider-Sense.

it does make sense super hearing combined with the hair all over his body combined with the fact that he seems to pick up radio signals or some type of wavelength that cant be detected by normal humans and spidermagic and radioactive blood it kinda does but it would be constant

Why does Superman have so much muscle? wouldn't working out that much be pretty redundant for him? or is his bodybuilding body a superpower too

>This power doesn't make any sense.

It makes far more sense than his ability to fly but in saying that

>This cape superpower makes no sense

kys

>original incarnation is just a reflex about danger
>only helpful to let Spidey know there's something wrong but not enough to do much unless he already has an idea what's coming
>now it's low-tier precog that can be trained to basically know the future

Power creep is the worst