/ausnz/

Too big! edition

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NO SEX TALK EDITION

I just stubbed my toe and feel awful.

I hate myself desu.

...

Not sure if to continue to do stuff or go to bed

go to bread

*does stuff to you*
try sleep now!

if you're tired go to bed, if you're not go to bed

Agreed, this general is now a no-lewd zone.
Ow

man I sure do love me some of that sex!

how about you fellow gentlesirs and ma'ams? do you love the sexings?

yes, we talk about funny looking politicans now

I WANT A REVOLUTIONARY GF NOW!
Feels bad desu.
Alpha.

i love the rock and roll
youtube.com/watch?v=lknLxGcIeKg

No virgins here haha
I've personally had lots of sexes

yeah man!
sex!
High five!
I sure am particle to regular sex activity.

I can't understand but it looks funny desu :3
>no virgins here

Y-yeah h-heh heh

>I WANT A REVOLUTIONARY GF NOW!
Go back in time to France, 1789. I'm sure there are plenty of them there

y-yeah... I've done the sex, many times in fact

*partial
spelled the wrong word because I was thinking of sex

Bonjour mamosuelle. Su tu plait laisse moi te câliner :3

y..yea m..me too

why did you lie to me then?

I thought you had Karen, you womanizer

W-we are all s-s-so experienced h-heh heh. Only d-dummies haven't d-done it r-right?
Karen speaks French desu. She's a smart girl :3

What if I don't want bread?
Nice stuff I hope, like getting me a cup of hot chocolate?
I'll get ready for it now

i-i wasn't lying then... but I might be bluffing now
>What if I don't want bread?
the bread is not optional

>I'll get ready for it now
Have a nice sleep my friend. I'd kill to go back to sleep now
>Karen speaks French desu. She's a smart girl :3
Does she drink wine too?

Wow I can't hotlink tonight

N-no. She's too pure for alcohol desu.

y..yes haha

and to think you could be telling the truth right now
what a shame

I-I-I bet you've done the lewd with many pretty girls r-right desu?

y-yeah... but being a virgin isn't that bad

How many people here are actually virgins?

a..at least 20 hahaa aahahahaha aofsijdsfnhdsgwhu

I held hands one time, that's basically sex right?

you know what's alot better?
Not being one, but I guess you wouldn't know about that.

I could really use a hot chocolate now

Ouch

Also goodmorning guys

I'm not desu :3

me, but only ironically
wtf, that's so much lewder than sex
s-shup up

>Female co-worker asks if the flowers I bought are for my girlfriend

S-sure they are Marissa h-ha ha.
None of us are desu. :3
Dude I've done so many that I am a mega alpha man now hehahah.
Good morning desu!

me because i wast my time on the internet with making stuff
morning

good morning mate, sleep well?

They are surely joking, I can't believe there are really that much people still virgins at the age of 20+
Oi

It is
Good morning
>>Female co-worker asks if the flowers I bought are for my girlfriend
Why did you buy flowers then?
>None of us are desu. :3
I know I am>me because i wast my time on the internet with making stuff
Story of my life

i-i am. ;_;

I'm in bed now and it's super cozy

Yeah, slept like a children
How was you day?

I'm also in bed and it is very cozy, I don't know why I would ever leave this bed

I could really only do that for you if you were good, you have to earn that much first
The leash comes after

Not meant to be just not in the place for this now
I can see we would get along great normally but this just has to do for tonight

N-no desu you probably have had many 10/10 gfs desu :3
I wanted to put the flowers in a vase cause they were pretty desu.

THIS CONVERSATION GOT PERSONAL AAAAAH
Wish I could join you desu.
Work was difficult and now I'm sitting here super tired at home desu.

didnt go to work today because im sick
hope you get a step closer to true comfyness
yea you have to talk to us

Have a few beers & you might pass out.

me in the pic sucking yoru finger

Lucky bastards
I have an important appointment in a couple of hours and I want to sleep
you're not alone my friend

morning singa, sleep well?

you don't belong here desu

I'd rather be conscious desu.
Lewd desu!

only in certain ways, not the traditional one.

hmmm well there's always tomorrow!!

At least it's the weekend now

>10 beers deep
>somehow find myself at a tinder match's house at 2am
>never done anything like this, usually an awkward guy and the only reason I'm in this situation is alcohol
>girl is an objectively an easy 8 or 9
>get in bed, lights off and things get saucy
>can't get hard, a mix of whisky dick and nerves seeing as still a virgin and have only had dick touched literally once years ago
>she sucks but still at like quarter mast
>give up and I start eating her out, all is going well but still not getting hard
>after awhile ask her to succ again but still no luck
>she gets up to go get water
>decide while she's gone to whip out my phone and see if I can't get my dick to work the ol fashioned way
>first sight of a naked girl on my phone and reality sort of hits me all at once
>a girl 10x hotter than that has literally been sucking my dick for the past 20 mins
>right then with no way of stopping it, limp as fuck (quarter mast) I literally bust
>about 3 seconds later she walks in the door
>panic
>ask if I can have a shower and she says "are you serious? but yeah?"
>hope that maybe she didn't notice
>come back and she says something like "you know you could've done that in the shower"
>get defensive and act like I don't know what she's talking about and leave
>as I walk at like 3am on empty streets I sit down to gather my thoughts
>feel ashamed, humiliated and helpless; don't know what the fuck to do
>message her with some sort of legible explanation, say something like; I'm really sorry, I'm a virgin with some serious trust issue who's drunk as fuck and has never really been in a situation even close to that
>to my surprise she seemed pretty cool with it all, and didn't make a big deal out of it whatsoever

To date the furthest I've ever been with a girl but yah know also the most humiliating thing to have happened. This will be the last time I venture out of my shell, completely fucked

>spray your semen all over my glasses
w-wew

but you're not a virgin either, haha baka non-virgin

I slept until 3 desu but I'm only posting now
Indeed

Seems a good day :D
Get well desu

Got tired deleting bank account? ;)

Aww :3 goodmorning

Take a nap don't go to appointment sleepy

What a smug Sakurako

shut up
nobody knows about that
I might have to have sex with you so that if you expose me I can take you down with me.

wow, feels bad
what have you been doing with your day then?

What's the appointment about desu?
Yeah. Should be relaxing desu.
Damn user. I'm sorry it didn't go well desu.
How was your day desu?
Y-yes desu. I'm very sleepy.

been learning the standard London accent, my main problem that makes me sound very foreign is tenuis consonants desu.

Sakurako can be very smug at times
>nobody knows about that
we do, you've mentioned your highschool gf in the past, haha what a loser, you had sex with a girl
>I might have to have sex with you so that if you expose me I can take you down with me.
pls no

I've had noticeably hot birds show interest in me multiple times and literally never had or done anything non platonic with a chick am I austistic

>only in certain ways, not the traditional one.
I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
>Take a nap don't go to appointment sleepy
If I go to bed now, I think I won't wake up. Tired as I am I might sleep through all of my alarms
>What's the appointment about desu?
I'm not sure how to explain desu

No girl would ever find me attractive enough to let me fug her. Anyone else in this situation?

>yes to get laid in Italy or France is easy they are the countries of love afterall

That's it
I'll be knocking your door in a week, we'll see how much miss being a virgin.

Post a pic
we'll judge if you are lovable

:3

haha yeah
I'll be back in a bit, I'm gonna off myself real quick

dunno, maybe
but you're a normie, surely you could get some
whatever, I wouldn't let a non-virgin loser rape me

>THOT's in my general rejecting my lewd advances
JUST

Here's me as a baby.

So sorry for you...

why would you bother making lewd advances in the first place?

NO THOT

because I'm lonely?
why else?

Jealous of that girl desu

Noice desu
It's a queen size so more people could squish in

saKUrako

It was pretty fucked, this is only the second time really telling the story. Told it once to one of my closest buddies because it was just eating my up inside not talking to anyone about it. He's a pretty cool dude and (hopefully) understood not to mention it to anyone; but pretty much laughed it off and said shit happens.

I've pretty much accepted at this point that the only way I'm ever going to lose my virginity is if I get in a relationship where I actually trust the fuck out of the other person.

I guess the whole situation was sort of an important stepping stone to realising that the casual sex thing is close to impossible for me and not a good avenue to explore. Problem is I have some pretty bad trust issues which make it damn near impossible to even think about starting a relationship that will evolve into that.

Trying to focus on getting my own shit sorted at the moment (finish degree, move out, find good full-time work) before I even think about bringing other people in to my life. It just sucks seeing friends with girl friends they trust and just other people together in general - don't realise how hard it is for other people((((

Ahah yes I'm successful with people and no awkard whatsoever
D-date me...ahah

*joins you in bed*

must you hit on everything in this general with a heartbeat?

Same the soon I move out the soon I hope to sort myself
As for now I'm enjoying the comfy that I know I will lost someday...

of course
if somebody doesn't love me I have failed
it's all I have left

Don't die french bro
Althought I tought that you wouldn't had problem with girls...
I mean you even get into Ireland for a year
Maybe you will find love in Japan though :3

we all love you desu
and you love us back
r..right?

Have you looked into therapy for trust issues?
Good on you for trying to get all your ducks in a line!

Don't you parents or siblings l-love you?

Yes I do

well yea, but that's different
that's familial unconditional love