CLEAN

CLEAN
L
E
A
N

IT
T

UP
P

WAGEKEK
A
G
E
K
E
K

You know you've reached a new low when you work in a kino, and I've worked at a McDonald's

>tfw sitting in the back row alone, need to poop but don't want to miss any of the movie do you drop a fat ogre shit into one of the cup holders

not very nice to be desu

>creating jobs
>not nice

I bet you hate Trump too

Are you mentally ill or something?

Damn. this thread is a let down I hope nobody here leaves an establishment like that

fucking idiots

I didn't pay $20 to not shit in a cup holder.

>fat ogre shit
Lol throwback!

>shit in a cup holder.


People like you make me sick and I hope nobody actually does something like that

If you go to a screening where kids are allowed in you are watching a kids movie, why are you watching a kids movie?

>and I hope nobody actually does something like that
haha I actually shat into a cinema before.

had really badly to shit and squeezed it out during a "loud" segment of the movie, I mean the place was kinda empty only with a few people in front of me a few rows down but I still got that adrenaline rush from shitting in public.

like I shat on the ground and then put a empty popcorn bucket over it and moved low key to another row and then complained about the smell while going out.

>2017
>going to cinema

...

>popcorn box is for 2011 film Alvin and the Chipmunks 3: Chipwrecked
>2011 film

>Poltergeist
>Kids movie

>not paying $30 for a ticket, 20 for a small popcorn and drink + tip to sit in an uncomfortable seat, barely being able to watch the movie over the five cellphones open in your peripheral vision and the two kids constantly crying

>Being a cuck and have the entire movie spoiled before you watch it

the worst was I had to take off my pants completely because I was so scared getting shit on my pants.
so I was squatting there squeezing out a quiet turd onto the floor in almost complete darkness.
scary as fuck man
you don't want to have shit on your pants

also was paranoid for a few weeks going into the cinema because I thought they would have known it was me

>Not going to a niche theater

How the fuck did you wipe your ass then?

Was Martin Tino? (TV Kino for those not in the industry)

napkins I had left over from mcdonalds

>Keynesian economics

With your hand like any other first world country

...

What prevented you from just putting your phone on the seat and record the movie while you're taking a shit, and watch it after you leave the theater?

>it only smellz

Why do europeans masterbate in movie theaters

Nigger.

I'm 6'2 and squatting down I could still look over the seat and see what was happening.

it was actually that star wars movie that came last year, the one with han solo and that annoying woman.

it was a huge turd and thank god not a watery shit.

I'm actually a white man
like what should I have done?
poop my pants?
leave the theater and shit in the stall and miss half the movie?
nah man I just dump it and change seat.
best and easiest solution, some poor faggot can clean it up.

Refugees are afraid of the cinema so the native European women have to take temporary enrichment tools with them.

So I can ruin my experience by watching a random part of the movie after seeing the rest of it, while also committing a federal crime?

>People masturbate to porn
What else is new?

>while also committing a federal crime?
So taking a shit in a fucking theater is okay to you, but recoring a movie is a crime?

Yes. It is a federal crime to record a movie in a theatre, but shitting in one is not.

If you have an issue with that, I advise you write a letter to your local representative.

Why is there trays in the theater?? Are peopl really so fat?

Should be the other way around desu.

>shitting in one is not.
Maybe not, but do you realize that shit in public spaces basically has to be treated like a biohazard? It's not just a matter of scraping it into a trash can. Some employee has to get gloved up and completely sanitize the area, which fucks things up for everyone involved.

In public? I know euros are savages but this is just plain degeneracy

You're absolutely right, but I don't make the laws, just abide by them.

Why do you hate the idea of jobs being created do much?

You can't really judge europe by a single moment, where the fuck did it happen anyway?

>Some employee has to get gloved up and completely sanitize the area
good, its their job to clean up after viewers left the cinema.

It's fake you nimrods

> (You)
>You can't really judge europe by a single moment.
>judges americans on a single moment all the time


Lol europoors in full defence mode.

>In public?
of course

why wouldn't you?

>nimrods

Sit on it you nerd.

Are we in a high school in the 1950's?

Again...euros are all savages.

its just masturbation man
just get the dick out and rub one out, helps relaxing

>Europe
>Poor
Americans have to microwave water because they can't afford kettles, America is literally nothing more than a slightly better developed 3rd-world country.

Your commitment to this made my day. Thanks senpai

>euros need a stove to get hot water

I'll stick to just turning the knob, thanks

we actually use pic related for that.

>euros have no running water and must carry large coffee containers everywhere

Europe is a strange and backwards place

>and must carry large coffee containers everywhere
what? thats not how it works your retarded burger.

Why didn't you do it into the popcorn container if you had one on hand?

You said you don't turn knobs for water. Ergo you have no running water.

Explains the stench last time I was in London and Paris

Why would you shit on your popcorn?

...

He clearly stated that kettles are used to heat our water. And you turn the tap for water, not fucking knobs.

What a retarded country

But you covered the shit with the popcorn box, so you'd have wasted the popcorn either way

Fuck off back to India.

>doesn't have running water
>has to have a BBC kettle licence to heat water
>other countries are retarded

>Doesn't have the voltage to run a kettle
>Has to pay for third-world country tier-electricity
>Allowed to see graphic gore but naughty words and boobies are too much for the sensitive Amerilard

>literally can't handle the bantz

oh dear

>always make sure to empty my xxl drink on the seats after im done

>always put chocolate between the seats so they melt and stick to everything

>always empty my popcorn bucket around me "Oops, my fingers slipped, silly me ;^)"

>always shove my finger down my throat and projectile vomit over several rows in front of me (oh im feeling sooo sick today XD)

>always give a cheeky smile to the workers as I leave the cinema

Pick it up wagecuck

>responding to bantz with literally can't handle the bantz
>not seeing the irony in this
>remember Americans are retarded and don't understand subtlty or irony

>implying I'm even in the Western Hemisphere

Oh dear

When I'm done with watching my kino and I didnt manage to eat all my popcorn and drink my coke I'll mix them together and throw the bucket through the cinema. Also I always carry a couple of sticks of butter to hide in the seats, when they don't find them and it starts to smell really badly it is already to late :^)

>tfw have to chuckle when I smell the rancid butter

((("""american"""))) """(((people)))"""

haha that's one angry doggie

>when you smear doodoo over yourself and the wagecucks have to clean you

I think the smell of your own feces might ruin the immersion a little. Therefore, cupshitting in a movie theater is NOT kino.

That's why you move seats after you're finished, turbonerd.

Moving seats also ruins the immersion. Now I remember that im in a movie theater. PLus, it doesnt matter where you move, the whole theater will smell like shit.

M-MAYUGE...

>he doesn't sniff his own farts and feels comfortable while doing so
>he doesnt inspect and smell his own shit after pressing out a big snake

How backwards and gay are you?

>Living in an irrelevant county