ITT: We post things that would have made Alien Covenant better

ITT: We post things that would have made Alien Covenant better.
1. Make Shaw's contribution to David's research greater. Perhaps manipulate the black goo so that when it enters her, she produces something capable of laying the first Xeno egg, which then becomes the first queen

get rid of the poofters and dyke

I thought she would become some kind of pseudo queen, still somewhat conscious.

Give Daniels an attractive haircut, and don't introduce the Xenomorph in the last 30 minutes.

2. Ridley Scott has no creative input

this, was expecting this and disappointed when we only got her corpse and drawings

hoping David doesn't fuck up with Daniels in the next one

Get rid of the twist ending because it is WAY too obvious. I expected it the whole time. Walter winning would have actually been a bigger twist because I expected that less. Also, Walter was a good character and I'm not sure why I'd want to see the next movie if he isn't going to be in it.

Oh god, I just imagine her kooch becoming some kind of ovipositor constantly laying eggs against her will.

/spoiler/ porn when? /spoiler/

>Movie begins with Shaw and David landing on engineer planet
>whereas the one in Prometheus was a military installation, this one was a science/religious outpost
>discover that engineers worshipped the xenos because they believed the xenos were destined to cleanse the universe of the engineer's other failed creations, but the engineers were killed by them eons ago when the xenos got loose on the planet and their transport ships
>David becomes obsessed with the xenos and tries to reverse-engineer them from info he finds in the engineer archives (resulting in the neomorphs)
>David learns that one of the engineer ships that had been overrun by xenos is still out in the galaxy, an ancient map indicating that it crash landed on LV-426
>unsatisfied with the neos, David somehow steals a ship to head to LV-426 to find the xeno's original form

Dyke dies

James Franco the lead

re-write the entire script into a good one

>people actually like this crap film

First off. I saw this at a special thursday showing, and I'm not lying, probably 50 or more percent of the people in the theatre were seniors. Me and my girlfriend are 22 and we had an old couple in front of us and on both sides of us, the entire theatre smelled like old people.

Second off, people were checking their phones 30 minutes in. It was distracting. The old man sitting beside me fell asleep and I knew when he fell asleep because his breathing changed from quiet to slow and heavy and the old lady in front kept turning around to see who was making so much noise.

Third off, when the movie ended, only 1 group of nerdy highschoolers awkwardly clapped. I felt so embarrassed for them, myself, and everyone around me. They started off clapping so confidently, like they thought they could get everyone else to clap too. Then the old lady on the other side of me was about to start clapping but when she saw no one else was joining along with them she changed her mind. Everyone left the theatre in dead silence.

directed by neil blomkamp

Do you pay more attention to the theater than to the movie?

If I started drinking at 7am could I get through all the alien movies? What order do I watch them in?

Have that chick act like David had her fooled at the end
Then have her kill him like she knew it was him all along

Would've been more surprising, given her a better arc overall (esp. Since David took Walter from her) and I really just want to see the look on that POS David's face as he knew he's been beaten by something so "inferior"

Also I feel like David only won so the hack could make an easy sequel that no one but him really wants

It would have been cool if they didn't retcon the tech levels from the first alien as well
Wasn't this before the first movie even took place?

Don't drink at all, watch 1 and 2 in the evening with the lights off. You will get nothing but boredom out of an alien marathon

I want to watch David experiment on the Covenant crew more than anything.

they didn't completely retcon the tech levels. Bear in mind that even in the first Alien the stasis chambers were much more advanced than the rest of the Nostromo .

No prometheus or covenant?

Watch Prom, then Cov, Aliens 1,2,3. Then play Aliens: Isolation

ignore Resurrection and the AvP films

I'm not sure this pasta will take off. It doesn't have the same initial draw like "Imagine being Arnold" or "You just KNOW".

Kill David. Fassbender is basically the franchise's Ripley at this point yet without any of the character arcs or tension of having a vulnerable killable hero.

The sociopathic Android is such a tired cliche now. What is even the appeal of spending so much screentime on a character that's immune to literally all if the hazards in the film?

have fassbender fuck the alien in the pusy !

Change everything that's not David or Walter.

Fine.
But it's no longer an alien movie
It's a movie about some dumb android, they've lost the plot

Ridley should've killed himself not Tony.

If the Engineer ship with Xeno eggs has already crash landed on LV-426, there's no narrative need for David to go there. In fact it's an unnessecary complication

just watched this tonight. every character in the film felt so one dimensional and cheap -- except for the captain's wife, her performance was easily the best. Next best performance was David & Walter. Still enjoyable overall, in comparison to more recent scifi thrillers this one takes the cake.

Why would David call it a "perfect organism"? It's a mindless predator not capable of establishing a civilization. Hardly something that can surpass humans which created the android.

The entire third act shouldn't have happened. It was basically the first film condensed into 10 minutes.

Instead the film should have ended on the beautiful scene of the chestburster coming out of Oram.

This would have provided the time to put more depth into the previous scenes and then the next film could have focused on the xenomorph.

...

Written by: Autism

This. I don't grok the characters in the lore who end up as alien fanboys. They can't even reproduce until someone stumbles upon them and does something stupid, like every movie.

>Why would David call it a "perfect organism"? It's a mindless predator not capable of establishing a civilization.

It's also worse at being a mindless predator than the airborne undetectable neomorph virus the goo created.

David is a retard apparently.

This is what happens when you hamstring yourself to continuity and try to retcon your own bullshit story. Ridley is the real retard. Why bother trying to make it all line up?

Then again that cunt was talking about bringing Ripley's mother into the story for the next one.

>Walter winning would have actually been a bigger twist because I expected that less. Also, Walter was a good character and I'm not sure why I'd want to see the next movie if he isn't going to be in it.

Yes to this but don't worry since you didn't see the death of Walter they can (and will) bring him back in some convoluted bullshit.

I think it's just David's autistic love for his creation. Just like every child is "perfect" in their mother's eyes.

The only interesting thing left in this franchise is the engineers and all we got was one 30 second scene of David exterminating them all while they looked confused

And how did Shaw rebuild David an entire cyborg body? WTF

>how did Shaw rebuild David an entire cyborg body? WTF

She didn't. She was dragging it along in the end of prometheus and a deleted scene from covenant has her putting him together.

He's trying to wipe out civilization. Not make a new one. Also a mindless predator isn't enough to wipe out civilization.

more sexy ayys like geiger would have wanted

>he smuggled two face huggers but not the all-powerful goo

the embryos were all he had left of Shaw. The goo he can remake if he wanted to.

What was that thing at the end of prometheus? That killed the engineer? I understand that the aliens change with the host, I just wish there weren't aliens native to each individual movie.

Or at least have some autistic companion app that lets me read about all this dumb bullshit

>he can remake
You're giving him too much credit. He is just a tinkerer, he has no idea how the goo really works or how to manufacture it. He's just playing with bricks engineers gave him.