Syrian "Refugee" coming over to pick up couch

In 5 minutes a Syrian "Refugee" will come over to my flat to pick up an old couch. Should i be worried Sup Forums?

Periscope and make a happening

You think this is all game, don't you cuck?

This is your chance to get your very own basement slave. Play your cards right.

Leave the couch out the front with a note attached to it.

Stay in the house and what ever you do, do not let them inside.

eww, you actually interact with them?

Probably this would be the best option

How fast can you move a couch out of an flat?

I dont want to pay money to a trashcompany just to throw away an old couch.

IT'S BEEN ALMOST 10 MINUTES NOW, WHERE IS user

I'm here. He hasnt called yet

Found him

It's almost like you want to get robbed.

Any last self defense tipps.

Sorry i dont have a gun.

THEY DON'T "CALL" THEY JUST TURN UP, RAPE AND STEAL

He's kind of a big fella. Dont know if i could overpower him.

Sew up your arse fella, he might suffer from a sexual emergency while in your flat.

I'll pray for you through my religion, that is RIGHT

Fuck now i'm actually scared

Just put your couch out in front of the door like the Aussie said.
Or invite him and spike his drink.

Postmark his ass and send him back where he came from. Last time i checked Syrians belong to Syria

Dude i live in the center of town. I cant just put a couch on the street.

oi, dont post my lord and saviour sturgeon here.

I'll pray for you user so that you and your arse can be spared cultural enrichment.
On a serious note, go have a word with your neighbour and ask them to listen out for anything that may sound like your being raped.

>set up periscope in your room
>slighty open your door
>lie down seductively on your couch, naked
>???
>profit

Dis gon b gud

Dont bully plz. I'm in love with er.

Are you still alive Hans?

You shouldn't make fun of the refugee, he's just probably mentally challenged and that's all, nothing bad

Does anyone have that screencap of someone saying they'd like to stick their dick up her arse and give last night's haggis a stir, and someone replied saying it was the most disgusting thing he'd read?

Yea some guy just called. He's sending a friend to get it. Oh shit what have i put myself into.

Chloroform, my dude.

Offer him a coffee and talk a bit.
Score cultural victory.
Persuade him to leave country.

> Lives in austria
> Mountains everywhere

Why don't you have an SUV with a trailer so you can go dump your couch yourself?

You still have time to make a before and after pic of your anus, quick!

...

Make a selfie with him post it here if you are still alive.

Put smallpox in the cushions

Dude periscope it. post link

I'll try to snap a pic of him. Cant promise though

I'm sure the user will be mentally challanged too after the refugee beats him unconscious and rapes him.

>Persuade him to leave country.

Take a big greasy shit under one of the cushions.
"Here ya go matey".

Have your God Bless Assad posters ready.

someone screnncap this in very likely case op gets robbed, raped or allahu ackbared

The refugee wouldn't touch OP's ass, pigmeat is haram

livestream

rape him.
tit for tat.

This.

I have offered my no more needed furniture to poor with transportation.
One fine woman with 4 children offered back box of candy. One guy just gave me 2 cucumbers from his tiny garden.

If the guy getting couch offers you something back you are dealing with decent person.

Pay him in euro cents

Don't NOT sew your anus up. Start doing stretch exercises with your anus now. Pretend like your dropping a huge turd. Go fully dilated and relax. Then back to full gape and relax. Do this about 20 times. Then practice deep throating something- a cucumber or banana works.
Hope you make your new bull happy OP

...

Ok i'm gonna go for a smoke and wait for him. Be right back for report.

>wanting to watch an Austrian sell his couch with a 91.5% chance of rape and robbery
what the fuck is wrong with you

TRUTH NEEDS TO BE SEEN.

Hide some bacon under the cushions

no happenings lately, I'm little bored

Put bacon or bacon fat in the cushions or down the back of it somewhere

Keep a weapon on hand and make sure he sees that you have it ready if need be. Don't place it in your surrounded area, keep it tucked into your pants and clearly visible.

Beat him to near death if need be. Don't let him near your children.

Unpaid sex worker here, trust me OP if he overpowers you just go limp and present yourself to him. Make him feel happy and welcome. If he forces himself into your there's no reason you can't both enjoy it.

Hive mind.

...

>be syrian rapefugee
>get free couch
>and free boibussy

He called me 15 minutes ago to ask me for a parking spot.

He'll be here any minute. I have a knife if push comes to shove.

Wait how do you know his size? This seems fake, unless you met him on Grindr?

why does he need a parking spot for this carbomb?

save a life, bin that knife

I would burn the couch first. You are a complete retard. Please leave your diseases in the couch.

Saw his whats app profile pic.

>Superior American investigative mind

Call police, accuse him of stealing.

Austria, no! You must let yourself be culturally enriched. What are you, a racist or something?!

Are you zlovenian by any chance ?

You mean Slovakian? Never heard of a country called zlovenia.

Bye user, even though our time together was short , I will miss you.

Slovenia =Zlovenia

Slovaks are nice

...

555-come on now sir the refugee already has a obamaphone and a Merkelwagon? And now an Austrians couch and possibly virginity apparently

Did OP dieded?

I wouldnt worry.

I think you're forgetting you're nothing but subhuman ape inbreds

I witness you

yeah their ability to absolutely fuck up an entire staircase by carrying furniture through it is astounding. second to none in this world. i'm theorizing it's actually the reason why their country looks like this

godspeed OP

He said hed be here in a minute its been 30 minutes. Somethings fishy here.

...

.t Upper Carniola

kek

OP, nicht deutschsprachige ,südliche zeitangaben sind mehr so pimaldaumen orientierungshilfen.

For you, maybe.

Good knowing you user

Yea but he doesnt answer his phone now. Fuckin shitskins i swear i hate them.

REEEEEEEEEE

Arabs are never on time

why you sold your couch to him anyways?
gift your couch, feel the ouch

...

lol a refugee has a car but i cant afford one. nice

Might be ee just dicks with you. Send him message and go reward yourself with beer if delay is 1 hour.

You tried.

His friend has.

Are you a woman? If so, you should

OP you are getting played with by an alpha male. its up to you to be the alpha and tell him to fuck off because someone else came on time to pick it up

put pork heads around your door

the refugee who lives in my building also had his own ensemble of helpers. none of them knew a word of german and the guy they got furniture from actually drove them around.
i have to admit they seemed alright except for the part where they fucked up the staircase

user is dead