Let me see. Red hair... vacant expressions... tatty second hand book... you must be the Weasleys

>Let me see. Red hair... vacant expressions... tatty second hand book... you must be the Weasleys.

woah this guy was kindof an asshole

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More like BASED Aryan wizard.

>Loses slave because of a sock
>Tries to kill child

>TIME TO FUCKING MURDER THIS LITTLE BOY RIGHT OUTSIDE OF DUMBLEDORE'S OFFICE JUST BECAUSE I LOST MY FUCK-UP SERVANT

jesus christ rowling

Lucius is fucking BASED as fuck.
Expert duelist and Voldie's second hand during the first war. He was also a fucking nerd at school and kicks asses with dark magic, much like Snape does too.

>jesus christ rowling

That didn't happen in the books. IDK why they did that in the movie, it was fucking retarded. Not that I am defending Rowling, she is a hack

That guy was a real jerk

>Red hair... vacant expressions... tatty second hand books...

But the Weasleys are like that.

desu the thing i hate most about the movies is that i now don't remember how i visualized the characters while reading the book.

That wasn't his only motivation.. Harry Potter shit on Slytherin constantly.. If you were raised into an occult order where you were indoctrinated into a cult and given reality altering powers it's pretty justified to kill in it's name.

The Malfoy family took great pride in their being Slytherin. Harry Potter was cucking their family name pretty consistently and making his son look like a pathetic little twat.

I am sure in many ways Harry Potter reminded him of his father and Harry's dad probably did the same thing to him. He's finally getting payback on Chad's son

Where is that copypasta, it should have been appeared by now

Isn't he like around the same age as Ron's parents? Shouldn't he already know them? The fact that he already knows the name 'Weasley' suggests he does. It's not like they're famous or something.

Also Harry's sock ruse to free Dobby made no sense. Why are there even slaves if the rules are so slack?

Why didn't the Weasleys just buy one new book and then replicate it multiple times using magic?

Why are there so many stupid threads on Sup Forums right now?

because early morning Sup Forums is a poor man's Sup Forums

>should have been appeared
Go back to school you dumb Twitter brit.

>Narcissa described in the books as a real beauty
>Movies make her look like a hag who forgot to take care of her roots

What did Warner Brothers mean by this?

published books are copy written with "muh magical spells"

also its illegal in wizard law

inb4 leg stretching

Who cleans the Malfoys' clothes?

>not wanting the notations and highlights of your ancestors to help you in your wizardry

>ginger
You must be from the only ginger family in all of Hogwarts

Did you really expect a character that wasn't a pathetically two-dimensional generic villain in one of the dullest franchises in the history of movie franchises? Each episode following the boy wizard and his pals from Hogwarts Academy as they fight assorted villains has been indistinguishable from the others. Aside from the gloomy imagery, the series’ only consistency has been its lack of excitement and ineffective use of special effects, all to make magic unmagical, to make action seem inert.

Perhaps the die was cast when Rowling vetoed the idea of Spielberg directing the series; she made sure the series would never be mistaken for a work of art that meant anything to anybody?just ridiculously profitable cross-promotion for her books. The Harry Potter series might be anti-Christian (or not), but it’s certainly the anti-James Bond series in its refusal of wonder, beauty and excitement. No one wants to face that fact. Now, thankfully, they no longer have to.

>a-at least the books were good though

"No!"
The writing is dreadful; the book was terrible. As I read, I noticed that every time a character went for a walk, the author wrote instead that the character "stretched his legs."

I began marking on the back of an envelope every time that phrase was repeated. I stopped only after I had marked the envelope several dozen times. I was incredulous. Rowling's mind is so governed by cliches and dead metaphors that she has no other style of writing. Later I read a lavish, loving review of Harry Potter by the same Stephen King. He wrote something to the effect of, "If these kids are reading Harry Potter at 11 or 12, then when they get older they will go on to read Stephen King." And he was quite right. He was not being ironic. When you read "Harry Potter" you are, in fact, trained to read Stephen King.

Didn't happen in the books. Avada Kedavra wasn't invented until book 4.

>tatty clothes when you can do magic

There it is

and why wasnt there more teens doing futa spells?

>Let me see... indistinguishable villains... gloomy imagery... stretched his legs... this must be the dullest franchise.

...

...

There's only like a few hundred wizard families, and the Weasley were famous as one of like two dozen pure blood lines. Plus the Malfoys have known the Weasleys since like forever and had grown up around eachother for generations.

If pure blood lines are so rare, why did Hermione take offense at being called mudblood? It's like going to africa and calling people niggers.

>Dumbledore was planning to have Harry killed the entire time
lel

Why are all the death eaters white?

>implying there wasn't
those girls dorms must be pretty crazy at night

Thanks for spoiling it for me asshole

She was pure human. Most people have one wizard parent or like an aunt or something. She was pleb until one day she wasn't

They aren't.

Man, all these years later and Harry Potter is still giving me good fetish material. It's the gift that keeps on giving.

>I would like to take me to Hogsmeade back room, call your friends Crab and Goyle and then leave

Poor Draco

did they?

Blame western society and corporate culture

If it was a healthy culture we'd have dozens of movies exploring Harry Potter universe from different angles, you'd have Playboy series present: Hermione goes to college etc

Funny thing is they are not making billions of dollars by doing this, then again millenials are neutered so there would be a boycott anyway

he's a real life anime character

i mean with things like magic why are people poor or ugly? can't you just do a permanent charm or enchantment and give your wife massive magic titties? imagine christina hendricks as mrs weasley
i wonder if there's a magical world version of playboy? do their girls dress up as bunnies? it would be fun seeing hermione in one but i'm pretty sure watson would have a fit and refuse to shoot the scenes

There's nothing that would imply Harry's dad and Malfoy were in the same grade or even knew each other otherwise.

Also, his son was a pathetic little twat. The books acknowledged that. Malfoy is basically a rich, slightly smarter version of Dudley.

>le nazi wizard allegory

>Voldemort literally cannot kill you Harry cos of Lily's love
>oh that protection is broken? Now he literally can't kill you cos your wand are brothers
>oh you lost that wand? Good thing he literally can't kill you cos of the rules of the elder wand, good thing it's a sentient object that can bend the rules as he likes

Rowling writitn

What did Chris Columbus mean by this?

Like baneposting, this meme will never get old.

She wrote a book about a boy who goes to a magical school to practice wizardry and battle a cardboard villain and then realized how stupidly profitable that formula was and wrote 6 more books. The first book is very tight plot-wise; the others are a complete fucking mess. I've read the entire series twice, and if I remember correctly the retarded "lily's love" plot armor was introduced in the fourth book when rowling finally ran out of excuses as to why snakeman didn't just off harry by sending him a letter full of anthrax or whatever stupidly poisonous magical substance happened to be lying around. Fucking christ I hate talking about this shitty franchise I"m going to go stretch my legs.

>There's nothing that would imply Harry's dad and Malfoy were in the same grade or even knew each other otherwise.

Watch the scene before you criticize it?

youtube.com/watch?v=oZjk_gtkbd0

...

...

They are children's books that the hack Rowling turned into dark young adult/all ages books without the writing or underlying ideas evolving. Example:

Love was the most powerful magic. The most insulting thing about love being a defensive tool is that literally no one would be able to harm or kill another person in the Harry Potter universe if love was as powerful of a magic as it was between Harry and his mother.

If Dumbledore knew that Harry's mother's love for him protected him, why wasn't this being taught to all of the students in Hogwarts defense against the dark arts classes? It seems to be the most effective defense against any sort of harmful spell at all. Love wasn't just a major theme that underscored the actions of the characters, like a well-written series would shwo, it was the most powerful force in the plot itself.

>tfw ginger

wish i looked pure ivy league like lucius.

kek

The whole house system is retarded.
>hmm... This child shows great potential for evil
>put him in the evil house
JUST FUCKING ARREST THEM IF YOU HAVE THE MAGIC MINORITY REPORT HAT

The houses aren't inherently good or evil. They are sorted into these houses by what seems to be personality type.

Snape was in Slytherin and he was a hero. He did however share the personality traits of other Slytherin villains such as pompousness and introversion. These traits may increase the likelihood of being evil but don't guarantee it.

This is probably done for student cohesion. If you have peers that you can relate to and befriend, you will get a lot more out of the program. Therefore, houses.

iirc Isaacs ad-libbed the "avada" because the script just said it was a curse without giving him a specific line

but Snape tho

>when one Slytherin ends up not being a piece of shit Dumbledore's interpretation is that he was "sorted too soon"

>shit on Slytherin constantly

No, everything you said applies to Snape, doesn't apply to Lucius's limited exposure. And I'm sure Draco would've spun his anecdotes in a way that would flaunt his own success over Harry's so all Lucius would really see is Harry being subjugated. Riddle's diary being destroyed is the only real motivation he has and at the time he still didn't know how much he fucked up his own shit by passing it along.

He was a delight in his open menace. The actor was perfect.
>Your parents were meddlesome fools too
>What use is there being a disgrace to the name of wizards, if they don't even pay you well for it?

A shame they never kept the Mr Weasley/Lucius brawl from the books

why are the weasley's considered blood traitors? i never understood that. at first thought i figured it was just their annoyance at arthur's muggle obsession but that's not it

I saw Umbridge as Pepe without even knowing about him yet

Woah JK Rowling looks like THAT?

Thank you for your service

a new twist. I like it.

>why are the weasley's considered blood traitors?

They mingle and sympathize with muggles.

CRABBED

A friend of mine swire Skeeter wuz black

She was pretty milfy desu

He does know Arthur in the scene, not his kids

Credit to board

she definitely self-inserted as Ginny, no doubts there

A daring synthesis

I do agree that the mystic bullshit is kind of iffy, but I always thought that the underlying part of that protection was sacrifice in the name of love. Surely, Voldermot would've had a same level of protection if he had let Bellatrix sacrifice herself for him, but he was too proud for that.

>tfw you'd probably be put into Slytherin
>tfw a house full of autistic pompous faggots would never be a unified house

I thought the actress they had for Professor Sprout was more accurate for Umbridge.

In the books, during Harry's trip on Snape's memories, it is said that when Snape, Lily and James were sorted and Snape landed in Slytherin, Malfoy was the one to welcome him. So Lucius is a couple of years older, just like Mr. Weasley.

>tfw you realize how charged with politics the books were
>rowling has now become a malfoy without realizing it

Shit, I did too, I always imagined her a smug green toad.

>his family name is literally "Evil Faith" in french
Wow... Who could have thought...

>vol de mort
>flight of death
bravo rowling

What would happen if I used a polyjuice potion to transmog into a woman and then got pregnant?

you would be pregnant

as long as you kept drinking it for the next 9 months, several times a day, then you'd give birth to a healthy baby. I guess it won't be yours tho, not biologically.

But then I'd change back into a man.

That's Goyle though retard.

When will tumblr fuck off back to Sup Forums?
Hannibal ended years ago

Both extremely subtle compared to professor Wolf Wolf who turned out to be a werewolf.

>The books acknowledged that. Malfoy is basically a rich, slightly smarter version of Dudley.

The fuck are you talking about? Malfoy was among top students just slightly behind Hermione the whole fucking saga, you lying piece of shit.

If drink polyjuice potion, transform into a small 6yo boy, chop my own hand off, what would happen to me when I transform back?

As if they're any different.

das gud pasta mang

>Let me see. Emotionless eyes, oversized nose, burnt smell... you must be a Goldstein.

Why specifically a small 6yo boy to mutilate yourself? And your hand would still be gone I suppose.

it's still your hand, it just looks different
but it can be fixed unless it was cut off with dark magic

I just did some research on this, apparently Rowling never even used the phrase "Stretch their legs" or variations of.

That's what makes the pasta good
She's still incredibly formulaic, though.

It's been out for so long that Hermione is black now. I hate Rowling.

Is this bait? That's how Voldy killed Harry's parents and tried to kill him.

Didn't they take all the Slytherin kids and lock them in the dungeon during the 7th book? Felt like Rowling was saying stuff like internment camps were a good idea.