Finally take the red pill and decide to go to church

>finally take the red pill and decide to go to church
>attend run of the mill modern protestant church
>meet a group of guys
>"What do you do, user?"
>construction worker
>they laugh "You're one of those guys who tear up the street to justify your expenditures, aren't you?"
>laugh to be friendly
>It pays the bills. What do you do?
>"I'm an investment portfolio manager."
>360 moonwalk the fuck out

Why are churches in America so shit today, Sup Forums?

>red pill
>church

Maybe you should get a better job.

I'm an atheist and this story is made up.

What part of the country??

>red pill
>church

>giving a shit what construction workers have to say
>ever

>posting off topic op's
>SAGED

>investment portfolio manager
that's a glorified sales/commissions guy

wait no, that is basically a sales guy

>church
If god claims he is everywhere at the same time, then i'm sure you can pray to him whenever you feel like it and wherever you want.

It's an honest job that pays decent compared to everything else available.

>tips

>protestant

>Protestants
HAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

Tip tip tip

*tips my fedora to my fellow enlighted brother*

>red pill
>protestant

Why did you go to church? Jesus didn't.

This.

As much I hated my old church at least they were honest to say "We can worship anywhere, but we worship here so we can meet here to find others like us"

I hated that shit as a kid but now that I am an adult it is a bit more enticing.

there's other churches. can't really help people there for the social club aspect

Uugghhhaaaaaa I'm not enlightening myself SO hard thanks to you!

>successful people are shit

You should take a few more pills, buddy.

THIS. we dont need churches

>protestant
Found your problem. Protestants are heretics.

Jesus went to the temple and loved being there. But thanks for playing.

...

>red pill
>protestant

lolno

Become Eastern Orthodox.

>investment portfolio manager
>not in a synagogue

believe it or not, being a greedy bastard who lives off of the work of others or manipulates numbers is not exclusive to jews. there aren't enough jews in the world for that.

>red pill
>church
>things that never happened

Where the fuck do you faggots live where you consistently meet smug people all the time? Like I see these green text stories about sjws and smug assholes all the time and they just seem ridiculous. Ive never met anyone like I see mentioned in your typical Sup Forums greentext.

>"I'm an investment portfolio manager."
>360 moonwalk the fuck out
>Hating the rich simply because of their wealth
>Knuckling under to their greed
>going to a Protestant church

Probably some shit like "non denominational" Christian which just preaches the cancer that is prosperity Gospel.

>why are churches so shit today?

You've been reading The Screwtape Letters again, haven't you? Corresp. between a junior devil and his uncle Satan -- how to create division inside Christianity and drive ppl OUT OF CHURCHES.

>"I'm an investment portfolio manager."
>360 moonwalk the fuck out
I don't get it. Why did you do that?

Generally people that make large differences in money can't be friends.

>Protestant (((Chruch)))

Kikes.

>not going to church means you are an atheist

>Being an atheist means your gay

>you're one of those guys who needs other peoples wealth, to make returns on other people's companies to justify your commissions aren't you

it was a test.

you were supposed to say it's closer to a carpenter and then call him a kike. all of the people listening would have laughed and made fun of his giant herb nose and kikesh ways.

the guy would laugh too, rub his hands and get a good chuckle out of everyone.

it was a test to see if you were a faggot

>trusting American churches
>expecting anything but manipulative junk, begging for money and cultish people

Just stop until you find people you like that recommend you to join them to a church. Pray on your own or w/e

>American Protestant church

Found the problem. They're essentially community centers at this point. A lot of them also give loads of money to our greatest ally, refugee groups, and other "really makes you think" causes. Hell, the one near my old university flew a big rainbow flag out front. If you're interested in Christianity, I can only recommend certain Catholic and Orthodox churches (Sedevacantist, pre-Vatican II, that kind of thing).

As an aside, Christ would've scourged an "investment portfolio manager" with a whip.

>it's kinda close to what jesus did and i like it
>shouldn't you go to the synagogue of satan then?
I like those response

lol that was me a few years ago when I decided to attend a church while living in northern Virginia. I was a security guard, literally every other man there was a post-college professional or in a management position.

I certainly didn't begrudge them but I was out of there. I can spend Sunday working out and playing vidya

>protestant
>redpill

Fool. You want Catholicism.

>red pill
>church

holy shit lmfao

What assholes. Typical wasp behaviour. Those weren't Christians

Last I checked the Pope was a spic

Go read the Catechism, it's free on the vatican website. The actual church doctrine is sensible as fuck don't believe what the media tells you.

>redpill
>church

>this post
>reply with tips because you have nothing else to say

>"I know your works, that you are neither cold nor hot, I will vomit you out of my mouth. Because you say, I am rich, have become wealthy and have need of nothing; and do not know that you are wretched and miserable and poor and blind and naked"

Those type of "Christians" will be in for a rude awakening at Christ's judgement. Do not have fellowship with them.

christianity is blue pill as fuck unless you are gnostic

The attitude of most people in Northern Virginia is the clearest example of the cancer that kills traditional societal values. There's nothing wrong with success, but when success becomes your only defining trait, you begin to lose your humanity.

corruption

that was a shit church anyways if they are talking shit to you

>Protestant

That's where you fucked up

#NotAllChristards

Because you socialize with local Christian folks and become an active member of your community. Also pretty sure Yeshua said to go forth and spread the gospel. On a final note church is two or more people reflecting on the Bible, that's all.

At least, not anymore :^)

>Catholocism

I don't know how you guys live with it. Lol.

>papists
lmao
they did study of iq sorted by religion
Quakers: above Jews
>Episcopalians: above jews
>lutherans: on par with jews
>presbyterians: above the japanese
>papists: sub 100

>Not going to a small town church
>Not going to a Mexican church

It's GOAT

>take redpill
>immediately go to place where they shovel bluepills into your mouth

Smart move OP.

so you literally go to church to preach to the choir? how do you spread the message by going to church?

also, church music is gay as fuck. i don't mind bible study and whatever, but fuck church music

Not a fan of church. I grew up Baptist, went to church 2-3 times a week bored af.

Now I say that church is like Anal sex: If they force it on you as a kid you ain't gonna want it when you are an adult.

Went to big Baptist church in suburb. Big fucking place, like coffee bar, ATM for tithing, Valet, etc. Some jackass starts chatting me up b/c he knows who I came there with. He starts telling me about himself without me asking. Then asks me what I do. I tell him that I mind my own business. He takes it as I "own" my own business and asks what kind of business I own. I tell him it's one where people don't ask questions.

Haven't been back.

suburbs, man. just look for any community outside of a metropolitan area with lots of upscale shopping centers and golf courses. that's where the smug people congregate and live

You spread it through community events, helping better those in need. An example at my church is serving breakfast every Sunday. It's helping those in need that spreads the gospel user. When people see those doing good they will say "These are Christians".

Having fun worshiping your dead kike on a stick, you freaks?

Why go to a church when you literally have virtually every iota of Christian theology at your fucking fingertips?

Then stop going there. Just because someone is religious does not mean they are a good person. Find a different church with people you can relate to.

Is relating to other people important, Hose?

Nothing wrong with investing in the market.

Only stupid niggers dont exploit the greatest market on earth

>redpill
>protestant

If you really wanted the redpill, you should join the Amish

For the Sacraments you idiot.

>cucklics

Jesus walked on water and turned water into (non-alcoholic) wine.

@OP why would you do a 360? that just turns you back into the church!!

>moonwalk

*orthodox

>>attend run of the mill modern protestant church

You fucked up

>360 degree turn and walk through him to leave the church.

>Go to church with my authentic crusader armor
>Walk in the front door holding my Templar knight flag in one hand and sword drawn in the other
>"My Lord" I exclaim "I am here to defend this church from the Muslim invaders. As long as I am here you have my protection and my sword"
>The whole church gasps
>The priest says "Son we allow all in here for Jesus accepts all his sons"
>"Blasphemy" I shout "These people are not hear by the word of God but by the word of Satan!"
>He calls for people to remove me
>I cry "Your holiness you are making a mistake"
>The cops come busting through the doors and tackle me to the ground
>I try my best to explain to them of the Muslim invasion and how I must grant safe passage to all the followers of Jesus Christ
>They take me to jail and talk over my story
>They then transfer me to a mental institution saying I am crazy and have delusional beliefs
>Get released 3 days later as perfectly sane

And that was my trip to church. They dont even want my protection. I am still upset these people don't even see the truth.

You are a retard, how can you gleam IQ from multiple peoples across disparate geographic areas, then claim that as the average for a catholic?

>"Blasphemy" I shout "These people are not hear by the word of God but by the word of Satan!"
here

kek

>red pill
>protestant
Go find an Orthodox church. Learn how to actually worship God.

>worshipping the wafer jew

>Red-pill
(((Cuckstrianity))) is the ultimate blue-pill and jewish master plot

Really? You are a fucking piece of garbage kike. Christianity is Europe as Europe is Christian.

To hate Christianity is to hate Europe.

Your projection is obvious, you're a kike.

This

Of course. Why would you want to around people who you can't relate to or who belittle you?

I don't care whether anyone "relates" to me or not.
I likewise don't care if anyone belittles or dislikes me. I'd like to understand why you do Paco.

i like how your average Sup Forums manchild's knowledge of the roman empire always seems to end with the sacking of rome, conveniently ignoring the thousand years of christian byzantine history that followed.

byzantium waged a thousand year, apocalyptic struggle with persia and islam, and was anything but effete, weak or made "beta" by christianity.

>working for an investment firm
>calling yourself a christian
You sure you didn't walk into a synagogue?

Because Church is a community where people can get together and do good and praise God. Staying someplace where you are not wanted for no reason is unhealthy and completely defeats the purpose. Why would you stay?

Don't you have Star Wars sets to steal?

kek

heretic who thinks the poop speaks directly from god

and this current poop wants christians to intermarry with mudslimes, what an omega cuck faggot

I can do good and praise God without you or anyone else though.
Only thing I'm ever really interested in in a church is the sermons and Bible studies.

modern churches music a shit. wooo we're like a modern day oasis, but christian

ancient hymns and chants are pretty cool though

Timothy McVeigh was Roman Catholic. Maybe that would be more your speed, potato nigger.

>going to church for any reason other than meeting women

> why America so shit today, Sup Forums?

fixed that for you.

DID YOU FORGET WE'RE SUPPOSED TO BE MAKING SHIT GREAT AGAIN?

>Canadian makes fun of American for being irreligious
Is it not opposite day?