Fish are dumb, dumb, dumb!

>Fish are dumb, dumb, dumb!

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What was his problem?

God I hated this fucking movie so much but this abortion of a musical number killed it for me it was like getting splinters shoved up under my fingernails for the 5 minutes or however long the scene was, the Elton John knockoff ass pederast crab god with his shitty lines and awful can you even call them slant rhymes, it was misery from start to finish and the first time I have genuinely regretted going to a Disney movie ever, this was bad Bad BAD

Cont.

I can just imagine the wide yellow toothed grin of the Disney executives that greenlit this disgusting dumpster fire movie and made sure to pencil in that the music had to be shit Shit SHIT! in the margins with their awful little rat hands and despicable perfumed oily voluptuous thighs straining against the fabric of their tailored Armani pinstriped suits, argh I hated this movie so much, it's made me transcend race, sex, space and time in my loathing and abhorrence of everything it possibly stands for and what it portends for the future of cinema and animated movies in particular
Someone fucking do me the mercy of shooting me if I go to another one of these or worse see a sequel in the making

they chase anything that glitters.. just like dumb humans

Thank you

i liked it

You're welcome!

I'M THE HIP HOP CRUSTACEAN MY RHYMES CAN FILL A NATION

What the actual fuck is wrong with you

Worst song, could barely even understand him.

Nice 33

Best Disney song in years.
Check my 5.

It had some really out of place lyrics. I've argued in the past that what makes a good disney song is its universality. A song you would want to listen to while in the car or with your family. This song shoehorns in plot points trying to explain the god guy's life and they just put in shitty lyrics that sound awful. The song itself is really unique compared to recent formulaic disney pop tier songs but yeah they fucked up

Probably because he only speaks reddit youtube.com/watch?v=WGOohBytKTU

>Could barely understand him
That's your cue to turn the volume up

I thought the visuals were great but that was a pretty weak song. Loved the movie though.

My last girlfriend wished she'd had a movie like this as a kid. Blonde princess movies don't make brown asian girls feel good.

Cause I'm shiny!

I really liked it. It's worth a rewatch for the visuals alone

You're a huge uninspired fucking faggot then you horrible memespewing garbage disposal of a person, I can't believe there are actually defenders of this monolithically banal pabulum ON THIS BOARD RIGHT NOW that can't understand what made this movie so utterly, terribly bad

Go away

Really satisfying
>muh stronk woman don't need no man
>gets thrown off the ship like a used up whore

Take your meds user, Jesus Christ

You don't need meds with Jesus
who's the dumdum now

...

>Blonde princess movies don't make brown asian girls feel good.

then why don't asians make something of their own? why does Disney have to do it?

Because Disney wanted to do it?

>every problem in the movie could have been solved if the water helped
>never helped, it only came in for comic relief or LITERAL deus ex machina to get the plot going in the right direction

This has to be the dumbest plot device I've seen in my life.

>What the actual fuck
don't say that

It's a cartoon

YOU HAVE A MENTAL DISORDER!!!

>It's a cartoon

So?
this isn't nitpicking, this is inconsistancy of a plot device that is just a tool for the writer to get something done but doesn't work when needed by the protagonist. It's crappy writing and especially bad when the protag them self says "why didn't you help".

REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Just a reminder that actual maori mythology is real fucked. That hook is his grandmothers jawbone, and he carries around a stachel full of this old ladies fingernails.

>He didn't understand the message of the movie

>then why don't asians make something of their own?

Something tells me the number of inspirational Filipino princess movies available in the US in the 1980s was pretty low.

>Tfw I read Maui died by getting cut in half my Te Fiti's Obsidian Vagina teeth

what was it?

>In a rare version, a goddess named Rohe is Māui's wife. He mistreats her in a cruel and unusual way. He wishes her to exchange faces with him because she is beautiful and he is ugly. When she objects he gets his way by reciting an incantation over her as she is sleeping. When she awakes and realises what has happened she leaves this world and goes down into the underworld where she becomes a goddess of death.
Gotta love those bloody natives

theres something I love about how dickish gods are in all the mythologies.

like people just get completely fucked over for no reason.

What could possibly bother you about an intentionally stilted but catchy song. You really aren't lucid.

Can you explain why you didn't like it or would you rather exercise a pseudointellectual vocabulary on the deflective point that the creators are well paid?

The song stands on it's own as a piece about a monster learning to love his own vanity. It's a fun invitation to stop hating yourself.

People can make a difference. Nature is limited and needs people's help. It's a movie about taking personal action to help the world and the people in it. Blaming the ocean isn't helpful, because its the ocean that needs your help. Comprende?

just in case anyone needed reminding

youtube.com/watch?v=93lrosBEW-Q

Well, in short the message of the movie is about finding out who you really are, and staying true to that.
>Maui is hiding his guilt and love for humans behind a selfish exterior due to him royally fucking up by stealing the heart.
>Moana just goes along with being the new chief despite not actually wanting to. In "How Far I'll Go", she ventures out for her own reasons and not to actually return the Heart like her Grandma wished. What happens? The Ocean almost kills her and her pig. Later on she would've gotten herself and Maui killed by Te Ka if not for him blocking it. She's selfish and arrogant.
>Moana's people hide on their Island and as a result forget their traditions (Who they really are), which is being voyagers, travelling to other islands. They also lack the humanity that Moana had, which is why the Ocean chose her, and it's also the reason Te Ka let her return the heart in the end.

The Ocean couldn't just take her there. Her people would still be fucked, Moana would still be arrogant, selfish, unwilling to actually be a leader, and Maui would still be on his Island withering away in his own guilt.

This movie actually has a nice meaning to it but many people just call The Ocean not just returning the heart itself a plot hole, which it isn't.

No chance of that buster

That face after he says "seafood" makes it all worth the terrible lyrics and everything else about this mess

This scene is legitimate kino and brings this movie a step above the other modern Disney musicals
youtube.com/watch?v=HEiSF8HpyDg

>Moana's dad and friend thirst for seaborne adventures
>Ocean fucking murders the friend and terrorizes Moana's dad, permanently scaring him into a landlocked existence in which he tries to hold his daughter
Yep just be yourself. Unless you aren't the chosen one, then fuck you. Die horribly or get out of the way.

The Ocean is pretty neutral throughout the movie, it's never really shown to be 'good'

CONSIDER THE COCONUT