Things you won't hear Muslims say

Things you won't hear Muslims say

Anything rational.

pass the bacon

>I denounce jihad against America

We are here to take over and establish Sharia.

Oh wait, they do say that. Just not at first.

You are so beautiful madam, may I have your number??

Oh I don't know. Things like Talmudic passages on Christ until the same ones invented isis? Things like that? You cunt

apostacy is okay!

/

there is no penalty for apostacy

I agree, we can compromise on-

My wife doesn't have to wear the hijab if she doesn't want to

fpbp

>i like it when women are exposed to fallen angel lust

Hello Lev Tahor

>We apologize for our extremists

>Officer, my fellow muslim neightbor is planning an attack

>Thank you

>I don't follow the teachings of a pedophile

I'm truly sorry.

Instead of going to Europe, I think I will stay here in my home country and try to make it a better place.

>sorry about terrorism, it's a problem that festers in the fringes of our religion and we should hold those mosques that preach it as virtuous accountable.

I don't fuck livestock.

>Hello, DHS? There a radical Islamic terrorist taking refuge in my house and you need to come pick him up.

imagined colin saying this

You know, maybe fucking goats is against Allah's will

>Yes it's okay if you go to the party and do drugs then get fucked by chads Fatima, I'm a feminist and support all my daughters decisions.

DO you guys want me to do a Vocaroo to BTFO all of you ?