Hello everyone. I'm american and this is my experience with sharting. It firsted started when I was five...

Hello everyone. I'm american and this is my experience with sharting. It firsted started when I was five, I went to the local Walmart with my mother, whom is a raging alcoholic. We were browsing the alcohol section while I noticed something. Brown stains at the back of her pants. It was as if someone stabbed her but instead of blood it was poop. It trickled down her flabby legs and onto the dirty white floor. The smell was horrid.


I was shocked at first but momma quickly explained to me that there is nothing wrong with to and that the owners of Walmart even encourage it. You see, a long time ago when we were fighting the British our brave soldiers would shart to confuse them. While the British were wondering what the hell was happening our brave men would come out from behind the foliage, with the freshly made shart leaking out of their assholes and dripping down their flabby legs and they'd ambush them. The British never even stood a chance.

Sharting can never be forgotten, it is the thing which this proud nation is built upon. It is an American Tradition. One which we promised our forefathers we'd carry on. Now please excuse me, I have to take a trip to Walmart to honor my brave ancestors who fought off british tyranny.

Sage and reported

...

Go fuck a teakettle you bitchass calling cookies biscuit ass fucking muslim ass bitch.

How about you lose an entire seafaring empire again, faggot? Your grandmother needed so many dicks your country took over the world to get her enough. Go fuck some black pudding while thinking of the queen, faggot. Your food is so shit Africa chased you out so they could go back to eating dirt. Don’t you have a muslim bull to prep or is it time to put fucking beans on fucking toast & pretend you don’t want to kill yourself. Are you gonna pray to allah when you’re done here or jack it with your Big Ben dildo?

I’d tell you to slit your wrists but you don’t have ANY FUCKING KNIVES DO YA???

I tried searching “best blowjob ever” on pornhub but all I could find was your COUNTRY FUCKING SUCKING BITCH

LEAK IN THE BOUTIQUE

You enjoying that statist cock up your ass, Pajeet?

...

Ewww wtf americans are gross

I have been drinking heavily, but even I know this is silly.
Brits GIT OUT.
Sup Forums IS OURS
NO MATTER HOW MUCH THE ROOM SPINS

Poo on aisle 2

I would never make the "poo" in the aisle two.
I am a good American.
God bless Britain, God bless the United states.
Shh.
It;'s good now.
B ugtogrpoasfc

careful, we'll give you the india treatment & make a permanent meme about YOUR COUNTRY
theres more of us than you, so you're fucked if we decide to do that

>Hello everyone. I'm american and this is my experience with sharting.

Are you mentally ill?

This is awesome.

>Work at Walmart
>Maintenance guy is some muslim who tries telling me what to do
>I spill something and I call him over to clean it up
>He says its not my responsibility to clean up after you
>I say yes it is its your job to clean stuff now clean the floor
>Hes pissed and calls my manager
>She says well its not his job to clean the floor its your so do it
>Hes cussing at me under his breath while he cleans it
>I run to the restroom
>Shit on the floor
>Get on the pager and page him to the bathroom
>Hey I need you to clean this shit off the floor
>He is fucking fuming
>Gets back on the walmart phone and calls my manager and says he is trying to make me clean shit
>She asks to speak with me because she is confused
>Tell her while using the restroom I noticed some shit on the floor
>She say oh put him back on the phone
>She tells him to clean the shit off the floor
>He does it and I watch laughing
>He doesnt use a glove and gets some on his hand

and that was the day I shit on your people Britain.

Lol. I cant believe this "shart in mart" shit caught on. Funny as bro. Anyway, take it easy mates.

Bahahaha "your people". Cause theyre all muzzies. Britain btfo. Fuckin classic

...

wait....
ameribro not poo in loo...

Did I unknowingly move to India

>not using the designated shitting aisles.

american diet........

fuck you niggers

must've been nice to have alcohol in your walmart.
my state doesnt even allow gas stations to sell beer.

t. sharters