Spider-Man #8 Storytime

Bendis being bendis

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>Badassiest
Legit chuckled.

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HALF THE FUCKING ISSUE WAS THIS CONVERSATION!!!!!

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Yeah I hated that shit and I usually like this book

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Why is Crystal wearing white?

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Miles' Grandma is basically his arch-nemesis now.

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Nova's already tangled with the Hulk and came back for seconds. He shouldn't be acting like a terrified little boy.

Bendis is writing Sam like he's never had a fight above street level thugs before.

Die Bendis

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> (So awkward)

Is Nova referring to Bendis' attempt at writing dialogue here?

Fin

The Bendis what?

I hate that Jessica now suddenly looks like le Netflix Jessica. I hate it.

Taylor?

Did we really need the reminder that Miles is a minority?

Yeah, and Kluh give him Brain Damage
That why he now a retard and a sad puppy dog

Bendis
The guy who waste 1 page just to deliver sex joke
That Bendix

Event tie-ins are actually the worst fucking thing

The 'You? Me? You?' dialogue doesn't really work when the panel is blocking the view of the people he's supposed to be to talking to.

OF COURSE! How else could Bendis pat himself on the back?

I can relate.

I really don't want to hav to read this just to be all caught up on Kamala.

> The three newer teen superheroes hang out and chat with each other about recent stuff.

There, you're caught up.

She goes by Crystal Meth now

i still kinda like Luke and Jessica together, Bendis can do it

hhaha, I only liked the first panel, couln'd care less about the rest.

JESUS AT LEAST SPOILER THIS SHIT

>Spider-Man is a kid of colour now.

Ignoring the fact that this shouldn't matter, he says it as if Miles is the only Spider-Man.

No, sometimes they can sometimes be better than the actual event itself. Not in this case, though, because this tie-in is written by Bendis.

>Confront kid about being careful with his identity and the people close to him
>wait, hol' up
>keep it cool mah nigga. peace out black spider-man

So you're telling me that Bruce Banner is a genius who made a big mistake and became the Hulk as a result of said mistake?

that's a lot of bendis speak

Yeah in like one title out of 20. In every other case interrupting the plot of the book to pay lip service to whatever bullshit event marvel's got going on is a terrible idea.

Thanks, OP.

I did all I could.

Gee, Carol, a volunteering mission? Against an incredibly powerful threat? When was the last time something like that went wrong and two underpowered volunteers got wrecked?

>Bruce Banner made one huge mistake in his life: He put his life at risk against the bomb to save the life of an innocent Rick Jones out of altruism, what a chuckfuck.
Tony Stark: Superhero Extraordinaire.

This is pure gold. Thanks, user.

>Caring about Kamala literally anywhere else other than her own book
Why do you do this to yourself?

>Using google sketchup for backgrounds
Really Marvel?

>Badassiest
Fucking Bendispeak for loser hipsters

Didn't Tony sabotage gamma bomb and screwed over Banner?

>Who's next?
>Zooms in in Miles' face.
""""""Subtle""""""

Because there isn't enough Kamala.

The David Cage of comic books.

You guys think Bendis writes his stories in half?
Like, one half the issue is one scene, the next is another?

Because these past few issues have been divided that way.

So I have a question.

What makes Ulysses' power any different from what Jessica does? Being a detective, I mean.

He's really good at finding clues, he can be wrong about what kind of story they tell, and people can either choose to act upon his findings or not.

I mean, it's kind of like if Batman got a case wrong this one time, and everyone gets into a fight the next time he accused someone else of something because he might not actually be the world's greatest detective.

Why is Miles so cute in this issue?

Nah, that's what you get for only reading the first issue of that Original Sin miniseries

I think Bendis has trouble balancing plotlines in his books, and that that problem has just gotten worse over time.

>What makes Ulysses' power any different from what Jessica does
Can Jessica predict an alien invasion?

Welcome to black people

But his grandma is Hispanic

Pretty badass to think that everyone on this plane has so much history.

Guys, I don't think I'm well. I actually enjoyed this. In fact, I'm generally enjoying this event. Send help.

If she was investigating a supposedly empty warehouse, and found the clues to suggest one would happen, yes.

Ulysses is technically a better detective because he can find the evidence without having to be where the clues are. The only differences are experience, and the ability to look into a specific crime before it happens.

He still has the same ability for error and bias and any normal person, so it is up to the people acting on his vision to be responsible.

How much prep time does she have?

Honest to God, if I was Miles I would've told Luke to fuck off after saying that.

So is it finally time to throw "badass" away in the same trashcan we threw "epic" in?

Please?

There really, really is.

Badass and epic are fine.
Badassiest is something you'd see on a tumblr blog.

>Crystal Lee. 16/f/saiposexual. The most badassiest feminist, I can't even. My pronouns are Blip/Bloop/Blorp.

Miles sure as fuck isnt going to be next. Bendis tried to have Peter killed in CWII so Miles could take his place.

This issue was so Bendis it hurts. People actually pay real money for this shit?

Have you not noticed that all of Ulysses's predictions become covers for Civil War II? Have you not seen the covers where Venom and Bucky are attacking him.

Of course he's not going to die. He's just going to become the next " din do nuffin'".

the spider on Miles' costume disappears for a few panels. just saying someone should have caught that before release.

What do you expect? The two images of Jessica's face close up on are the exact same image.

So his father STILL hates superheroes despite not living in Ultimate? What an asshole.

What was Jessica's biological mom like? I forget

Please, Spiderman have one exclusive Multiverse only for him, fuck the colors!

Why was this scene pretty much half the fucking issue?

>WORDS WORDS WORDS WORDS WORDS WORDS WORDS WORDS WORDS WORDS WORDS WORDS WORDS

>Bla Bla Bla Bla ect

Stupid Bendis

Fuck you Tony, the Avengers there are part from system, not the solution

It has Luke Cage, Jessica Jones and Miles in it and it's written by Bendis. It's self indulgence in it's purest form.

Why is Captain Marvel introducing herself? Everyone in the room knows who she is.

The heroes not perfect Kamala, that's reality

Fucking hell the first panel is the best of this issue

Is Tony Stark really saying that Banner heroically risking his own life to save Rick Jones was a mistake?
Fuck you Tony.

Because fucking Bendis needed to pad out the issue so he didn't have to spend too much time recounting the events of something that happened months ago in real-time AND comic time (Banner's death).

And also because Bendis is a fucking hack.

>and I usually like this book
You got mental problems, my dude.

Now that I think about it, wasn't Miles annoyed that there were people making a big deal out of the fact that he was black, as if that was what defined him?

What's with Old Man Logan's reaction? Isn't "confronting the Hulk" his entire shtick?

Wait, in the Civil War II comic, CAROL was the one yelling about accountability, not Tony. What the hell?

>Two black superheroes not already knowing each other
Check your white privilege, Bendis

I still maintain that blaming Carol for this makes little sense. Everyone agreed to do this a certain way, and then Clint on his own volition did something stupid.
Tony going all 9/11 truther on Carol is just plain pathetic.