Storytime of pain. All-new X-men 013

Gayschooling edition featuring snow princess

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When you thought this book couldn't get more hopeless

Tumblr is gonna love this

Reddit is gonna love this

NOOOOOOOO
WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS.

TEEN BOBBY HAS A PRECOZ EJACULATION

How can I lose that which I never had?

Sup Forumsmblr is gonna love this

Will x-men fans love this ?

Because I'm made of love, lo o o o ve

If they're the progressive fags I think they're then yeah

Fuck you i want to be back a 2010 where x-men teens were more prominent

>Poop tornado

Is Hopeless really this much of a tool? When someone makes a stupid retcon, and you know it's stupid, you don't have to play along with it, strictly speaking. You downplay it, avoid bringing it up, just let it exist in the background of your story. Writing gay Iceman stories isn't progressive and understanding, it's insulting.

I do it for the (you's)

...

>implying anyone read this shit

Hopeless is like Sup Forums, but marvel pays him 4 it

THE WINTER IS CUMMING

Sup Forums has a thick coating of irony in everything it does. Hopeless is much more genuine, but not in a good way. Writing (and botching) pregnant Jessica because his wife was pregnant is a perfect example.

More ppl than uncanny and all new inhumans

Idie sure changed a lot, since the time she chastised Kitty for being in a non-marital relationship with Colossus

wat

And this is the worst X book

...

Who the hell is Idie?

Black girl, she is one of Jason Aaron ocs.

...

Aaron wrote orcs? The girl is an orc?

He wrote one of the worst x-teen books

...

>I kissed a guy who didn't want to be kissed and then he punched me so I dropped out
>feel bad for me

Like, what? If this was a guy who kissed a girl, it would've been sexual assault! It's okay when it's gay?

Black? Her name sounds like she's some variety of Pacific Islander.

Or Middle Earther, I guess.

LITERALLY WHO?

Oh and let's not forget that being exposed to homosexuality magically turned him gay.

Remember when Evan was a wholesome, shy farmboy? I miss that

>LOOK IT'S THE INHUMANS PLEASE BUY THEIR BOOK(S)
Sup Forums was right

This is the MU were genocide is OK

FUCK YOU. I'm gay this shit is still obnoxious. Not even tumblr liked this shit.

>Remember when Evan was a wholesome, shy farmboy?
Hopeless doesn't

>I don't read comics
The storytimer we deserve.

Sup Forums isn't Sup Forums, but we were right on this one

>Inhumans don't like mutants
Since when?

>semi-autistic
>hetero
>like comics
>they don't show hetero flirting, so I can learn
>only homo

There is no Pepe for this feel.

>learning how to flirt from comics
You will die alone and unloved, regardless of gay pandering.

GAYYYYYYYYYYY

I read comics just not the shitty ones.

So Sup Forums what's worst, lobdell titans or hopeless ANXM

...Yeah, I can't keep reading this comic anymore. I was in it for Cyclopes, but it's not worth it for issues like this. I don't have a problem with gay people, but I can't relate or enjoy this at all. I don't want to read about an agenda ridden retcon of ice man sperging is ice cum all over the place because he's now a shy-homo-introvert. Just fuck this whole comic.

If you're trying to pick up life lessons from an Xmen book in ____AD, you have more problems than just autism.

"Emotional empath" is redundant. What you do is mind control.

Which actually makes this sort of interesting, because it's saying Bobby has some sort of complex where he's attracted to people who are just like the bitch that turned him gay, only male.

I'm not enjoying the book as it's boring and cliched. But complaining about X books pushing a progrssive agenda is flat out retarded. You have missed the entire point of the concept and should never read X books again.

What of I tell you that...
COMING NEXT ON ANXM
The Rear X-window featuring kid Hitler !
And after that... the Summersfucking goblin queen comes! And she'll teach Tyke the true meaning of COWGIRL

Screw you user, I want my Cyclops lead all new isolationist conservative white X men

Axel Alonso said that marvel has plans for both icemen.
Post your face when.
>Ice-man vol 2 starring teen iceman

>Romeo
>ROMEO
>FUCKING ROMEO

YOU CAN'T MAKE THIS SHIT UP FOLKS

And that's it for today
Now I might storytime teen titans for more focused pain

Lobdell

Not really, there is this guy called Empath, he was one of the original Emma Frost students from new mutants.

He has the same power, he can control emotions and by doing that he can make anyone do anything because they like him so much.

she's from Nigeria

I've read every single issue of Uncanny X-men from 1963-2008 and I have no fucking idea who Idie is.

>complaining about X books pushing a progrssive agenda
Pushing a "Progressive agenda" and outright retconing click bait aren't the same thing and this is clearly click bait horseshit. X-Men have always been about suffering as a minority class, but was written with more tact that this.
I wish I never read comics in my life.

Can you storytime Spider-man 2099 for a pain reliever?

You owe us for storytiming this garbage.

Even Austen issues? I feel bad for you

that is because she is from 2010.

>Next: More horror
Even the book itself acknowledges how bad it is.

>poop tornado
>icegasm
>Romeo
>inhumans/Crystal with dyke haircut

Dear God this is misery.

COMING ON ALL NEW X MEN 15
CAN CYCLOPS RESIST THE [SPOILER] WARM WET THICK [/SPOILER] CHARMS OF THE GOBLIN QUEEN, FOR MORE THAN 5 MINUTES?
Gimme an hour, I'm sure PAD will get this out of our systems

They were incredibly painful, yes. Although the Juggernaut/Squidboy story was moving. So silver lining.

Please do it, PAD just used the x-men from 2099 in the latest issue.

Forgot image, for the well being of Cyclops I really hope She doesn't have fangs down there

>dyke haircut
>pixie cut
>dyke
How underage of you.

That explains that.

Nope, wet

she used to be the new Wolfsbane (as in: self-hating religious girl)

Actually if anything that says they're probably just really old and live under a rock.

youtube.com/watch?v=7nhesX-8DXo

Honestly issues like this just have me roll my eyes simply because they only exist in order to perpetuate what was a terrible retcon and at the cost of the character's character. Who the Hell was this person in this issue that looked like Bobby and had his powers cuz that sure as Hell wasn't Bobby. Never in all of his years of publication has Bobby's personality been anything like this meek and shy person who can't even talk to people without screwing up every time. And then to throw in that bullshit of a line that he was never really good at flirting or talking to girls in High School when it's established in his history that he had a steady relationship before he came to the Xavier School and had an entire issue back in the previous All-New X-Men volume that was all about him and Scott flirting with random girls they met after sneaking out of the school for the day. Seriously fuck this retcon

Got it. Pure suffering. Most of it self induced.

T-thanks guys.

Oh God, that's worst than the Simpsons predicting donald trump presidency.

Also this is my first storytime, it's fun so I'll do it with 2099 in 20 mins, and then... TEEN TITANS as soon as the rips are up

That's all new shy gay teen Iceman...
He's a big guy

Honestly I think the 'Bobby is totally gay and not into girls at all' is because Bendis was pissed Bobby was dating his waifu.

>You're terrible at this
Fuck off. Mothboy attacked first and they were mostly defending themselves and civilians.

So I, the great OP, will guide you through these phase, well actually I'll redirect you to the right place

will tell you to kill yourself after voting for donald trump , if you're a tranny they'll tell you to share picks
apart from tell you to kill yourself will tell how to tie the most effective knot
might help you, so go there

Idie and Evan are experts on relationships? THE FUCK DID I JUST READ?

Some really gay comic, now pay up I didn't storytimed it 4 free

What's the point of creating a strongly religious character if they go full on fag hag at the first opportunity.

Honestly, I'd love to see a young mutant who is:
Sincere about being a modern Christian
Not a villain

This was one of the worst comics I had the displeasure of reading. Like fucking come on with this shit. I almost have to root for the Shithumans now to wipe off the muties on principle.

Romeo and Bobbyliet. Inhuman and Mutie love. So deep.

Because Hopeless is an Idiot. Especially stupid to have Crystal doing when she spent a ton of time around mutants when she married to quicksilver.

They both had relationships before.

Idie with Quentin Quire and Evan with some girl called Sprite.

See wolfsbane, but she is kinda of an extreme.

There is also Kurt who is more moderate but right now he is edgy.

But then Hopeless will write inhumans.Bobby will live because of the gay agenda.

Nightcrawler was a priest, the he fought a woman that wanted to be the pope

With Kurt, they eventually went a "Christianity is magic" route with demons and such.

Why did they think this would do any good things for his character? At least before he was fun and the guy that would either put a smile on his teammates faces or annoy them to no end. Now he feels like he got lost on his way to Degrassi and every time he gets a scene to himself it's always about reminding us that he's gay now.

Hopeless is at the bottom of the food chain in marvel, lower than the guy that's gonna write slapstick. This has been his truly highest selling book of all time and opportunity to prove that he could be a good writer considering his good work with inferno and X force... And he blew it.

I hope he rots in writer hell with pregnant spiderwoman and whoever is writing spider gwen

When there is such thing as demons, greek gods and others, christian magic isnt that of a stretch

You have to say "for you" when I say "big guy"

Oh, so that's who this bitch is! Hope she dies in that mist crap!

>Mothboy attacked first

PLEASE
Clearly you know nothing about dynamic entrances.

The first issue of Uncanny Inhumans had Triton about to attack Beast because he put up a protective time bubble around them to defend against Kang's alterations to the past.

There's a lot of mistrust and anger between Mutants and Inhumans after the M-Pox and whatever happened with Cyclops.

Storm and Medusa nearly fought in the X-Men tie in to Civil War
Dazzler and Medusa have been arguing in A-Force
Rogue and Cable have been openly hostile to Inhumans in Uncanny Avengers