"A'right, so there was this truck"

"A'right, so there was this truck"

"A Truck?"

"Yeah, in the desert, someone in it with a bag o'er their head, couple of other guys in there. Not me this time."

"WHICH desert."

"It might not've been a desert, there were mountains and grass not long after."

"What?"

"Look, they bring him out of the truck over to the plane, and there's this fella standing there right, like he's not got a belt on...but he has got a belt on."

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN!!!"

"Just listen! ‘E says, ‘e says ‘I’m CIA’."

"You mean he was with the CIA."

"No, no, he just says CIA."

"He’s the entire CIA?"

"No he…, look they say…uhh…look, we were to give you this doctor…"

"‘What Doctor?"

"HE was the main one they were bringing, but they brought the ones with bags as extra."

"Extra Doctors? And there’s two with bags now?"

"No! One ‘ems easy to forget. Look, CIA…"

"His given name."

"Yeah, CIA says…look, don’t know what you’re playin’ at here…can’t be bringing mates. But they say they work for this kind of gangster guy, called Blaine. And CIA says…right, we’ll take ‘im."

"Ok, I’ll stop you there. If they lift up the hoods, and it’s a monkey, or any kind of primate, we are NEVER doing this feature again."

Other urls found in this thread:

youtube.com/watch?v=H4GbGd5KqSE
twitter.com/NSFWRedditGif

“No, no listen. They get in the air, and CIA’s like, carrying on trying to get them to talk about the gangster.”

“While on the plane?”

“He says…where they’re going…they’re expecting one less than there is.”

“What do you MEAN Karl?”

“Like, what he’s saying is he’ll throw one out.”

“Of the plane?”

“Yeah, and like, he opens the door, and he pulls one over and like, shoots out the window next to his head.”

“‘Shoots him you mean.”

“No. He only pretends. And pretends to throw ‘im out. And CIA says… oh, he didn’t fly so good.”

“No, he didn’t.”

“Yes, he did.”

“No he didn’t. that’s not grammatically correct, you messed it up in your weird little Manc head.”

“Listen. And the other one, with the bag on their head, ‘e says…he says, well you wouldn’t shoot someone, would ya? if you were just going to chuck ‘em away anyway. And CIA walks over, takes off his mask, and its Blaine, and he’s got this like, metal spider thing, covering his mouth.”

“Oh CMON!”

“No, he does. It sort of looks like…did you ever open up a washing machine, and its all small pipes all close together. It was all that…but in face form.”

“Jesus Christ.”

“And CIA says…he says…if I take that off, would you be alright, or is it like a medicine thing. Would you die, basically, is what he was asking.”

*Sigh* All right, and what did he say.”

“He said it would hurt a lot and that.”

“Right.”

“For you.”

“What.”

“It would hurt a lot…for you.”

“WHAT DO YOU MEAN!”

“Nevermind. See its just ‘cause it’s me sayin’ it. If you saw that in a film, like, a film from that one who made Inception or what have ya, you’d think it was brilliant.”

“He wouldn’t PUT THAT in his films! He’s not that stupid!”

This is legit hilarious

10/10 if oc

...

>stealing pasta for (You)s

You speak with Karl's voice OP

you may, in fact, be karl

>“No, he didn’t.”
>“Yes, he did.”
howling

Ricky Gervais is hilarious and i don't care what you faggots have to say about him

>UUUU
>"What".

>stealing pasta
>stealing
>on anonymous message board

it's fresh pasta made in a bane thread yesterday or the day before I'm pretty sure

Bretty gud

I require more parodies of the scene. MORE

so this is the power of autism

Starring Clive Warren

...

It's been posted at least twice before, it's been aorund for three days.

>no one remembers or has the Tim Burton version of this scene from ~3 yeas ago

fucking hilarious OP

>youtube.com/watch?v=H4GbGd5KqSE starts playing
>shot of 30's open-top car, driven by a man in a tail-coat and fingerless gloves. His face is very pale.
>crazy professor in a blood-stained lab coat, with a pale face, messy hair and black circles around his eyes is sitting on a front seat
>few guys, handcuffed in medieval chains, wearing brown dirty sacks on their heads are sitting on a back seat
>car stops, they're on a dark and gloomy dock, where the evil-looking ship is waiting for them.
>It's nighttime, but the guy waiting for them in front of the ship is wearing sunglasses. He's dressed in victorian style, has a top hat and a cane. His face is also extremely pale.
>"Ahh, doktor Pavel! You are a welcome guest on our ship! But your friends, i'm afraid, will have to stay!"
>Dr, Pavel starts laughing manically
>Driver interrupts "They know the mystery of Bane! The masked man that's gone insane! No one knows why he wears a mask, and no one dares to even ask!"
>"Let them in"
>Scene on a ship. Lit candles, old furniture, piles of books, skulls, jars with fetuses and strange looking pale people fill the room.
>Tell us where the Bane is! Tell us who he is! Tell us where he is! I want to meet him in person!
>one of the handcuffed guys says in deep mysterious voice "Be careful with your wishes, my friend! In the nights like this they may come true..."
>CIA removes sack from the guy's head
>It's Johnny Depp, but his face is very pale.
>He proceeds to laugh uncontrollably, camera goes full dutch angle, helloween music intensifies, he breaks his chains and starts wrecking shit. Dr. Pavel doesn't wreck shit but also laughs. Johnny Depp uncuffs one of his companions who turns out to be Helena Boner Carted dressed as a medieval slut. Her face is also unhealthy pale.
>All three go on the upper deck and laugh and dance while the ship underneath them slowly submerges
>Christopher Walken on a small rowboat with a lantern picks them up right before the ship sinks

>jeep interior, a hooded person sits between two 10 year old girls on the backseat
>"this guy's pretty muscular" one of them says
>"hey tom, this is hat you'd look like if you went to the gym" the other laughs
>camera turns to show drake bell playing tom, the musket man
>"hey, i've got a six pack too. it's lemony and bubbly and i call it soda"
>girls smirk
>everyone gets out of jeep. everyone is barefoot
>camera turns to show only cia's feet
>cia is ariana grande
>she pouts
>"i don't know if my plane is large enough. there's not enough room" she complains while bouncing
>"it would be rude to turn away your guests" dr pavel, played by dan "slip inside her" schneider says
>"yeah, if they're too much trouble i can take of them" drake says. the two girls are randomly stretching in the background
>"i guess it's okay" ariana says while biting her lip

on the plane
>"okay my parents are expecting me, dr pavel, tom but only one of you. whoever goes longest without laughing gets to come to my party"
>grabs feather and begins tickling everyone's feet
>everyone laughs except bane
>"at least you can hold a straight face"
>she pulls off the hood. it's keenan
>"no one cared who i was without kel"
>"if i keep tickling you, will you ever laugh?"
>"it would be extremely annoying"
>"you're a big guy" she says while stroking his face
>"for you" he says with a wink
>she bites her lip again
>in the background, the shadow of dan can be seen furiously masturbating

GOd ISNT REAl MoRTY

OP is my hero

Nice
Very nice
Might I say
Very, very nice?

We need more Karlposting.

Lemme tell you about my mother

>you messed it up in your weird little Manc head

Top kek

...

The Christian god , and the gods of any other religion, are all false through simple logic. The only way you can actually believe in a god while not being retarded is deism, and even that is stretching it.

Thanks for sharing this m8
Also nice dubs

>“Nevermind. See its just ‘cause it’s me sayin’ it. If you saw that in a film, like, a film from that one who made Inception or what have ya, you’d think it was brilliant.”
>“He wouldn’t PUT THAT in his films! He’s not that stupid!

I am dying.

I would have used
>from that bloke who made Inception
but otherwise this is perfect, 10/10

Bump for fellow Anons that would like to read this and haven't yet.

wew

10/10 but missing a few LET HIM FINISH in there

if only all baneposting was this funny

Absolute rubbish. Play a record!

Fuck this movie.

>are all false through simple logic
>simple logic

You lack the understanding to speak on this subject. I don't doubt that your entire relationship with religion is about arguing whether or not a large man can live on a cloud.

I'm sorry it's far too late, I've already ran circles around you logically. good luck seeking refuge in the arms of your magical sky wizard

I wish I could think up something silly to say here

Pretty good OP

Thanks.