Garrison Keillor Pens Open Letter To Trump, Calls Him And His Fans Losers

How will Sup Forums ever recover?

liberalamerica.org/2016/09/02/garrison-keillor-pens-open-letter-to-trump-calls-him-a-loser/

>“The cap does not look good on you. It’s a duffer’s cap, and when you come to the microphone, you look like the warm-up guy, the guy who announces the license number of the car left in the parking lot, doors locked, lights on, motor running. The brim shadows your face, which gives a sinister look, as if you’d come to town to announce the closing of the pulp factory. Your eyes look dead and your scowl does not suggest American greatness so much as American indigestion. Your hair is the wrong color: People don’t want a president to be that shade of blond. You know that now.”

>“Running for president is your last bid for the respect of Manhattan. If you were to win election, they couldn’t ridicule you anymore. They could be horrified, but there is nothing ridiculous about being Leader of the Free World.”

>“The teleprompter is not your friend,” he said to Trump. “You are in the old tradition of locker room ranting and big honkers in the steam room, sitting naked, talking man talk, griping about the goons and ginks and lousy workmanship and the uppity broads and the great lays and how you vanquished your enemies at the bank.”

>“You are losing. And so are they but they love you for it. Meanwhile, you keep plugging away. It’s the hardest work you’ve ever done. You walk out in the white cap and you rant for an hour about stuff that means nothing and the fans scream and wave their signs and you wish you could level with them for once and say one true thing: I love you to death and when this is over I will have nothing that I want.”

Other urls found in this thread:

youtu.be/tmkq7yylRkU
youtube.com/watch?v=XVCtkzIXYzQ
archive.is/MX5ru
unz.com/isteve/garrison-keillor-jews-run-manhattan/
twitter.com/AnonBabble

Who?
We don't have time for nobody's here.

Who?

>Your hair is the wrong color: People don’t want a president to be that shade of blond.

wtf I love racism now

Garrison is apparently unaware that the small-town Minnesotans that he exploited to write Lake Wobegone are all members of the Trump Train

Well there went my last reason to tune to NPR.

That settles it. I'm #ShillingForHill now

Still waiting for someone to tell me whom this cuck is.

>a fucking nobody
HOW WILL TRUMP EVER RECOVER?

literally who?

This.
Only people voting in MN for Hillary are all the Twin Cities cucks and all the fags living in uptown

>those hateable glasses and that smug face

why are liberals so intentionally ugly?

Rude.

>white man who runs a white show about stuff white people like in the whitest state on earth on the whitest radio station on earth and has never seen a Mexican in his life whining about Trump

wow, color me shocked.

I seriously thought he was dead.

why he's stopped hosting it

Retired host of one of the most boring shows on NPR: A Prairie Home Companion. Don't get me wrong, it can be a comfy show, but it can be insufferable in high doses

>resorting to shaming tactics
the left is truly out of arguments

So, how long before the curse sets in? He's pretty much at death's door anyway.

>Expecting anyone who knows who Gary is to be on Sup Forums

m8, even people 20 years older than me don't know who Gary is. Why even post this here?

For the uneducated: He's the now retired host of the longest running radio variety show on radio, a Prairy Home Companion. Just like NPR, it's gone down hill quickly in recent years with ultra liberal, lefty skits that try to pander to the young hip crowd

The man is 74. He's free to retire w/o an excuse at that point IMO

I like it the little house in the prairie .
I got you only a teaspoon full of sweet is more than enough.

He should stick to sucking off his fellow cowboy buddies on his show. Home on the prairie isn't even that great a lot of the times.

Damn was it comfy, I always liked the muscial guests.

>Garrison Keilor
Literally who? Not even memeing. He looks like Rainn Wilson as an older cuck.

>home on the prairie

fucking kek

>literally-who chump calls up to thundering avalanche "You're nothing! You're not going anywhere! You don't exist!", while busying himself setting up a little lemonade stand at the base of the mountain

Literally who?

Prairie Home Companion was never good

I remembered having to listen to it when my parents made us go on cross country road trips, made me want to blow my brains out

>www.liberalamerica.org

This is a whole new level of trash.

Who?

Wow. We are truly finished this time. I can't defend Drumpf anymore. I am now a #shillforhill

Simpsons fans recognize him.

youtu.be/tmkq7yylRkU [Open]

WTF??? After reading this now I hate Trump!

>it can be a comfy show, but it can be insufferable in high doses

The ideal dose of Prairie Home Companion is half of one show, including a Guy Noir bit and excluding the musical guests. Unfortunately, I always seem to be in the car for the entire thing, plus the repeat the next day.

u wot m8

say that to my fckin face ill deck ya

If you don't know who he is you shouldn't be voting for Trump.

I wish you guys would stop sharing his picture. It literally ruins 28 years of Prairie Home Companion that I listened to. I always imagined in my head that he looked something like Sam Elliot in a classy suit. But reality is cruel and he's just another cuck

Literally who?

>Leader of the Free World
Merkel is the leader of the free world.

I feel the same way. I just want to wipe my memory of what he really looks like.

youtube.com/watch?v=XVCtkzIXYzQ

who gives a fuck about this guy? besides, NPR only has one good thing going for it and that's Car Talk. everything else sucks dick

My God I thought I was the only person who listened to A Prairie Home Companion. Garrison's bits about the right went from tongue in cheek to full-blown CNN the closer we got to election year.

He's a fraud with no ground to stand on when it comes to talking politics.

>Your hair is the wrong color: People don’t want a president to be that shade of blond.
wat

Also this. He's so sheltered and it shows. That's what a career in radio will do to you.

Why the fuck is Minnesota such a cucc'd state then? And I'm a Californian.

>your hair is the wrong color

This has to be one of the most profoundly scary things they've spun out yet.

>you have blonde hair
>you nazi!
>(hillary's not a nazi though even though she has blonde hair)

They're soon going to slip into the gibbering madness as the daemon-sultan azathoth calls them to his throne

Holy shit, I almost forgot this nigger existed. Is he really going come out of retirement to cap off his career by trying to stump the God Emperor?

twin cities is 3/5 o our population

>i look like an obese zombie yet i want to shame Donald Trump
>No blonde presidents
>use a teleprompter like obama so you can have respect
>being a man and enjoying oneself is jockish and wrong


MY father listened to this man every night it was on the radio for the past 15 years.
I want the fat liberal piece of shit removed.
All the time he took dad away from the family.
All the liberal spin and showtune faggotry needs to burn.

>You are losing.
Why do liberals project so much? God I can't wait for the inevitable post-election suicides.

Like a lot of other "blue" states, most of the large metro areas are filled with blue hairs, nu-males, nigs, spics, muzzies, fags, trannies, etc. that hold a disproportionate amount of influence. Most of PA is a red state but Philadelphia (and Pittsburgh too I'd assume) is so filled with Dems that they're able to effectively swing the state for them.

Is this that Retired Gameshow Host from NPR? Wow.

wtf I hate trump now.

>Spends his career idealizing a town that his political ideology wants totally destroyed

I think GK is a little confused.

Northern European stock.

>who gives a fuck about this guy?
He's got a good voice, some of his monologues are touching... good musical guests. But yeah, this is sad, it's not even a proper takedown, just the ruminations of a thirsty old man trying to impress some liberal skank - which is not uncoincidentally the them of many of his sketches.

You know, when the election's over, we really need to make sure people like him, who are so completely wrong, know exactly where they stand. I don't want them to be able to sweep their stupidity under the rug and move on to making snarky comments about something else. When Trump wins the election, people like Garrison should never be able to live shit like this down. They really ought to just be bullied relentlessly, in a way similar to how they've belittled the intelligence of the white working class.

I can't believe an adult person wrote this.

His show really bums me out. He talk a lot about European traditions and cultures which is kinda rare for NPR, but it's presented in a very lame and boring way.

This

I enjoyed his show and the one with the people telling stories, yes The Moth.

Both comfy listening

Who?

This dweeb is senile.

He's a pretentious dweeb and a third rate literary mimic in the first place, but he's also losing it to alz or alcholic dementia.

I've been bullying him on Twitter. Maybe this is a personal response.

Truly a face made for radio

>Garrison Keillor
Who?

Literally who?
It would be terrible if this guy somehow ended up at that "people that tried to stump the Trump but ended up with bad consequences" list...

holy shit that was perfect... listening to that show is like torture, i always sat perplexed at how people could enjoy that patronizing faux-homely dogshit

muh powder milk biscuits

This guy looks as though he wears corduroy undies.

Ah yes, the good old tactic of insulting and calling people idiots. I'm sure many Trump voters will change their minds after this. Just like Sony sent their people on interviews to call their fans idiots so they'd watch their shitty Ghostbusters remake.

here's the whole "takedown" by this faggot... this is among the most pitiful cuckoldry i've ever read. i'm surprised it didn't devolve into a whole paragraph of him just writing DRUMPF! DRUMPF! DRUMPF!

archive.is/MX5ru

the amount of shitlib nervous breakdowns and suicides we see this november is going to be fucking legendary

Is anyone as sensitive as Trumpfags?

Maybe sensitive isn't the right word because they're not sensitive about other people's problems - emotional?

who?
and why should i care?

So its literally

>YOU'RE NOT OLD MONEY AND YOU NEVER WILL BE ELITE OR TRULY RICH!

Christ, the disconnect between these people and the working class is too real.

IIRC Maine is the whitest state in the country.

Minnesota got fucked by Hmong and Somalis that the Feds shipped there to brown them up.

The best response to this is from Steve Sailer. tldr Keillor is projecting his own small-town insecurities onto Trump, which does not work.
unz.com/isteve/garrison-keillor-jews-run-manhattan/

I'm sure people are sick of:
"An open letter to Donald Trump"
"Donald Trump Makes Me Scared"
"I Fear For My Family"

How many op-ed blogs do we fucking need?

Is that Dwight from the Office?

i especially love how there's been a new "This Is No Longer Funny" piece every two weeks

Wow. This is fucking brutal.

>King of Cucks
This faggot can drown himself in Lake Woebegon.