Untitled

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youtube.com/watch?v=tCp3eM01dWM
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I'm

I am

I am

Today's the day I will die peacefully in my sleep.

"I AM"

I am

SNEED

I AM
Thanks god

CIA

Did a nigger write this? Grammar is all fucked up

Maybe it was a Japanese Salaryman

God isn't real though. Idk why Sup Forums's become so fucking horrified by that lately.

I AM

Wouldn't Velma's god be the sun or some rock totem? She is a prehistoric cavewoman.

I am

Just as horrible

I am.

it's not funny when you have parents who reply to dumb shit like this all day on facebook

Because people have realized that the only thing Atheists have accomplished is destroy the institutions holding Socialism and Islam back from taking over.

I hear Reddit is a beautiful holiday destination for fedora wearers this time of year.

I am

>God isn't real though

>Velma

I am

"I AM"

she was better before.

Iams

>those shoes
dropped

Feels like I'm on Facebook

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God's not dead!

Kys

>slut sucks more cocks than all OPs combined for her entire life
>lol no I'm with Jeesus now

Kek, neopentecostals are such dumb cretins

>getting triggered by religion/lack thereof

Kindly fuck off back to _______.

>my belief in a magical wizard has been reduced to posting dog pictures on a Sri Lankan normie forum instead of actually adhering to this belief and doing something with my life

"I Am"

God IS real
His name is Sneed

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This is not Reddit, you don't need to type something in order to create a thread.

You complete me. Sneedposting isn't worth it without you.

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I amsteals my idea back the fuck off

Another high quality Sup Forums thread approved by the anti-Sup Forums liberals from Sup Forums and Sup Forums

I see the notion of forgiveness is alien to (You).

You know, dear boy, there was an old sinner in the eighteenth century who declared that, if there were no God, he would have to be invented. S'il n'existait pas Dieu, il faudrait l'inventer. And man has actually invented God. And what's strange, what would be marvelous, is not that God should really exist; the marvel is that such an idea, the idea of the necessity of God, could enter the head of such a savage, vicious beast as man. So holy it is, so touching, so wise and so great a credit it does to man. As for me, I've long resolved not to think whether man created God or God man. And I won't go through all the axioms laid down by Russian boys on that subject, all derived from European hypotheses; for what's a hypothesis there, is an axiom with the Russian boy, and not only with the boys but with their teachers too, for our Russian professors are often just the same boys themselves. And so I omit all the hypotheses. For what are we aiming at now? I am trying to explain as quickly as possible my essential nature, that is what manner of man I am, what I believe in, and for what I hope, that's it, isn't it? And therefore I tell you that I accept God simply. But you must note this: if God exists and if He really did create the world, then, as we all know, He created it according to the geometry of Euclid and the human mind with the conception of only three dimensions in space. Yet there have been and still are geometricians and philosophers, and even some of the most distinguished, who doubt whether the whole universe, or to speak more widely the whole of being, was only created in Euclid's geometry; they even dare to dream that two parallel lines, which according to Euclid can never meet on earth, may meet somewhere in infinity. I have come to the conclusion that, since I can't understand even that, I can't expect to understand about God.

Where can I find more of these? Like specifically where?

I acknowledge humbly that I have no faculty for settling such questions, I have a Euclidian earthly mind, and how could I solve problems that are not of this world? And I advise you never to think about it either, my dear Alyosha, especially about God, whether He exists or not. All such questions [pg 258] are utterly inappropriate for a mind created with an idea of only three dimensions. And so I accept God and am glad to, and what's more, I accept His wisdom, His purpose—which are utterly beyond our ken; I believe in the underlying order and the meaning of life; I believe in the eternal harmony in which they say we shall one day be blended. I believe in the Word to Which the universe is striving, and Which Itself was ‘with God,’ and Which Itself is God and so on, and so on, to infinity. There are all sorts of phrases for it. I seem to be on the right path, don't I?

You think Fred puts a living, talking snake over his flint hard dino when he mines Wilma's quarry? Like, it just has a resigned look on it's face as Fred thrusts it into his wife over and over. Like, his job is to just sit there while Fred yabba-dabba-doos with the force of 20 years of underpaid menial labor, turning it's insides into the Le Brea tar pits, and, as Fred peels it off and drops it on the ground like a piece of garbage it just looks at the camera and pitifully squeaks out past about a gallon of Pebble's siblings, "It's a living."

>mfw atheist cucks can never forgive people
why are atheists so evil

In this moment, I AM euphoric.

Yet would you believe it, in the final result I don't accept this world of God's, and, although I know it exists, I don't accept it at all. It's not that I don't accept God, you must understand, it's the world created by Him I don't and cannot accept. Let me make it plain. I believe like a child that suffering will be healed and made up for, that all the humiliating absurdity of human contradictions will vanish like a pitiful mirage, like the despicable fabrication of the impotent and infinitely small Euclidian mind of man, that in the world's finale, at the moment of eternal harmony, something so precious will come to pass that it will suffice for all hearts, for the comforting of all resentments, for the atonement of all the crimes of humanity, of all the blood they've shed; that it will make it not only possible to forgive but to justify all that has happened with men—but though all that may come to pass, I don't accept it. I won't accept it. Even if parallel lines do meet and I see it myself, I shall see it and say that they've met, but still I won't accept it. That's what's at the root of me, Alyosha; that's my creed. I am in earnest in what I say. I began our talk as stupidly as I could on purpose, but I've led up to my confession, for that's all you want. You didn't want to hear about God, but only to know what the brother you love lives by. And so I've told you.

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The best is when gay porn actors do that shit.

Just Google minion memes

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At least it's not Lovecraft posting. Speaking of which, that reminds me of a cartoon idea I have...

Hell awaits, heathen.

This thread is not funny at all.

It's not a matter of forgiveness. I never held it against her to begin with, so there's nothing to forgive. I just think it's silly to think a shift in belief absolves you of all the past shit you've done that you perceive as bad, that a promise and a prayer just washes it all away.

But of course, if you believe that and it helps you sleep at night, more power to you. Contrary to what you seem to think, I have absolutely nothing against people being religious and no desire to see religion dismantled. I just think it's silly.

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I'm Sneed
youtube.com/watch?v=tCp3eM01dWM

Norm, is that you?

I'm no atheist. But that version of (((christianity))) is favored by con artists, favela dwellers and convicts.

Janny deletes an actual Meta thread after 10 posts, but this is still up.

>Velma

Literally me

Is it just me, or do these creatures seemed to be modern conceptions of lovecraftian themes?

It's weird that people from Dubai don't like The Flintstones cartoon but the people of Abu Dhabi do.

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I'm am'st've

*slow claps

>not nine minions at the bottom
triggered

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godmanit this actually happened to me it sucks

kek

Didn't Sup Forums or some board go through a period of creating minion memes?

holy fuck

>newfag can't blankpost

I swear to god, this post is almost Loss somehow. I can feel it.

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story?

la banana Xdddd

banana

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that's terrifying

I am.
But seriously mods. Delet this.

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I don't know who this character is, but he looks like he's made of CHEESE

>Top
>40
>Funniest
>Minion
>Jokes
End this world

why are minions universally loved by aunts?

These are frickin epic, can I save them? Thanks

Same. It was an Ethiopian though, so I don't feel as bad.

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I AM

daily reminder that you are all saved by grace

thank you jesus

I am

I thank Allah for another day and pray that one day soon all the filthy infidels will be purged from this earth

God has given more days than I deserve and I keep fucking things up to catastrophic levels. I'm about to fuck them up even more because I think I know what I want but it involves committing to having my cake or eating it and I'll probably have second thoughts after it's too late to go back.

I highly doubt she cares about praise from the likes of you