>movie trailer
>WHAT IF CTHULU WASN'T JUST A STORY
>ear shattering fart noise
>full frontal shot of Cthulu rising from the sea with water streaming off of its body
>black screen
>coming 2018
>movie
>opening shot is Cthulu rising out of the water
>movie is 2 hours and 45 minutes of Cthulu destroying a city
>ending is Cthulu standing over the leveled city roaring at the sky
>"What if everything you ever believed is a lie?"
>distant sound of woman screaming in hysterical agony
>mixed with drumbeat
>fad in on faraway bonfire burns at edge of jungle at night
>close just enough to make out silhouetted figures dancing around flames
>firelight catches vaguest outline of some kind of idol
>"What if science, mathematics, reason couldn't help you?"
>mental patient in straight jacket huddles in the corner of a padded cell
>reverse shot of the patient's face in absolute terror
>"What if nothing could help you?"
>seacaptain at helm stares in awe
>drops his hand from wheel
>shuffles out of pilot house
>crew standing on deck staring at something
>"What if nothing was going to be OK?"
>underwater, a giant three-lobed burning eye suddenly snaps open, catching man in deepsea diving suit in silhouette
>"Not for anyone."
>rapidfire montages of hideous statue dripping blood, Arab man floating midair in crowded Arabian market, passing man on street grinning with eel-like teeth, man running in terror through darkened underground corridoor
>"Ever again."
>amid ruins of bizarre architecture jutting from dark ocean enormous monster rises from the waves as ship rolls back on swell
>cut to black
>deafeningly loud, disturbing alien cry
>"The Call of Cthulhu"
>fade in on man on bus stop bench daytime, hand shaking, taking pack of lozenges from coat pocket
>almost panicking puts one in mouth
>his eyes dart to side
>oddly cute little girl in rain hat standing with obese mother beside bench
>smiles at man
>he gives her a lozenge
>she smiles wider and blinks her nictating membranes
>"Summer 2018"
I'm hyped already
very lovecraftian
seriously, this is good user.
As far as greentext trailers go, this is Columbus Day tier
Not really
>jungle
The cult was in a swamp, not a jungle.
KINO!!!
the joke
>you
kafkaesque?
>cthulu
>not really
It's obviously loosely based on a number of stories.
>What if a child dreamed more than you could imagine
>what if i told you
>it can be whatever it wanted
>one day they will join you in the sun
>>ear shattering fart noise
you totally botched that man of steel dialogue holt shit kill yourself faget
9/10 would watch.
>movie trailer
>WHAT IF RICK WASN'T JUST A STORY
>ear shattering burp noise
>full frontal shot of Rick rising from the sea with szechuan sauce streaming off of his body
>black screen
>coming 2018
>movie
>opening shot is Rick rising out of the sauce
>movie is 2 hours and 45 minutes of Rick destroying a church
>ending is Rick standing over the leveled church yelling 'Piiickle Riiick' at the sky
haha XD
This is surely the first time i've ever read this post! It was soooo funny... haha!!
>Fade in to stately office. A man stands at a rainblasted window. Voiceover.
>"It is a mistake to allow Jews to mingle with Aryans as social equals. At high school I drew the colour line at Jews as well as negroes."
>It's HP Lovecraft, smoking. Outside a nigger is being lynched from a lamppost. A smile cracks his lips.
>Based on the true story
>Lovecraft waiting for a hot dog from a nigger at a hot dog stand, Lovecraft eyes him intently, glances down quickly when eyes meet. VO continues.
>"The whole U.S. negro question is very simple. Certainly the negro is vastly the biological inferior of the Caucasian."
>Lovecraft writing at his desk, The Call of Cthulu. His eyes drift up thoughtfully. VO:
>"Therefore the much-abused “colour line” is a self-protective measure of the white American people to keep the blood of their descendants pure, and the institutions and greatness of their country unimpaired."
>Back at hot dog stand. Piano begins to play tellingly as Lovecraft glances more and more intensely at the nigger making his hot dog, the same from before. This time he does not look down as their eyes meet. The nigger drops the hotdog, suddenly recalls himself, apologizing.
> The love behind the hatred
>Lovecraft barks furiously at the nigger, HOW DARE YOU DISRESPECT THE CRAFT OF HOTDOG MAKING? DO YOU KNOW WHAT I WOULD GIVE TO BE WHERE YOU ARE! TYPICAL MINDLESS NEGRO!
>The love behind the craft
>Lovecraft. Summer 2018.
Kek. Is this pasta?
No just did it.
>Cosmos shattering fart noise.
i can just imagine the type of people that create these posts
>lean and skinny
>lives in mid-west USA
>5'11"
>has trendy/fashionable haircut (sides shaved, top combed to the side)
>wears glasses
>wears a jacket needlessly
>wears skinny jeans
>wears a pair of vans
>posts ironic/nihilistic memes on facebook
>has a group of friends who think their edgy behaviour is really groundbreaking and devastating
>thinks their drug use (marijuana) is justifiable
>has a sense their existence is one of solipsistic presence yet their acknowledgement never goes further than a mere thought
>browses robbit and watches countless reviews on youtube (will regurgitate these opinions as their own)
and this is why you can't into nuance, you are the very product that society demands. you are the very essence of supply and demand of humans in a civilisation.
how could you not pick up on his joke?
>underwater, a giant three-lobed burning eye suddenly snaps open, catching man in deepsea diving suit in silhouette
Oh shit