ITT we're gonna guess a quip some Avenger says before killing Thanos

ITT we're gonna guess a quip some Avenger says before killing Thanos

die you stupid nigger

You're a big guy

>First scene with Thanos and Avengers
>Thanos steps forward, towering over them
>Scene is genuinely tense and foreboding
>Iron Man: "Well... he looks bad"
>Audience: *bursts out into laughter*
>Black Widow: "Seriously???"
>Audience: *Screaming and crying with laughter*
>Thanos: *falls over and farts*
>Audience: *Rolling around on cinema floor laughing, several people passed out*

90% on Rotten Tomatoes

black lives *does a flip* matter

>The hammer is my penis

You can't kill me! I'm a god!

Gods aren't real.

>"Find another planet, you big grapefruit, earth is OURS!"

>Steppenwolf? Like the band?

Oh wait, that's Justice League

>Star Lord "Hey this is not about Earth only!"

>War Machine
The fucking nigger lost his spine and legs
>Dr. Strange lost his arms tho
So is Strange going to Affirmative Action him back up? No fucking stakes in comic book films, "Hurr durr we magic'd him back to life lol"

can someone explain RT??? 20 years ago not a single Marvel movie would have gotten a passing grade.
Most of them are "fine" (besides Civil War which was just inept from start to finish in terms of film making) but how would a professional critic give something like Thor a passing grade?

>nebula steals the gauntlet
Here, let me give you a hand.

Yes, I wonder who's behind it

>Steppenwolf, I adore Herman Hesse
Pretty patrician if you ask me.

for (you)

>take that, drumpf

I LIKE TO DREAM
YES YES

>you're not MY god

>Thanos getting beat down by each one of the Avengers after someone was able to get his gauntlet off
>Iron Man pushes him back with his pulse wave
>Hulk backhands him down to his knees
>Thor strikes him with a bolt of lightning
>Black Panther slashes his face
>Thanos tries to raise his fist to retaliate
>Hawkeye shoots an arrow that shocks his hand
>Captain America walks up to him without his shield
>"Back in Brooklyn, if there was one thing we learned, it was how to take one on the chin."
>Cap fires a strong right hook across Thanos' chin, knocking him out cold
>"With a chin like that, I thought he'd be tougher."

>Drax laughs "HAHAHAHA YOU HUMANS ARE SO FUNNY!"
>80s song starts to play
>Let's go home

I can unironically see this happening

You forgot
>Iron man shouts "ondaroos" and Spider-man snatches the fallen gauntlet

>20 years ago
You mean 1997?

YOU WERE TOO TRICKY FOR YOUR OWN GOOD THANOS

How does anyone to lose to anything with that gauntlet? It makes you stronger than a God.

He gets depressed and gives up

no gf

pretty much. check out some films from 1997 on rotten tomatoes (like mainstream block buster type films) and click on "top critics"which just means regular critics from back then

MiB got good reviews but has general rating of 7/10 ? if MiB is a 7/10 whats Civil War? a 4/10?
critics were alot harsher on "fun" movies.

not that fifth element is an amazing piece of film making but its better than any superhero movie in recent years

>I have to hand it to you
>give this guy a hand
>the glove didn't fit, you must acquit

>not "Talk to the hand, bitch"
Fucking hack

And here's me thinking Fifth Element was an artsy boring Oscar bait film when I watched it

>Iron Man references the OJ Simpson trial

Not exactly source material but pretty good

>cap - we're heros
>thanos - whats a hero to a god?
>Cap -whats a got to a non-believer?

i stole this

There's also the fact that movie critics were actual critics back then. Now you have 70% of them being bloggers and nerd culture shills, even in the top critics

don't get why you see it as oscar-bait material tbf

Well I thought it was artsy and boring

I was probably 10 or 11

im fucking dying

wtf is on da roos?

I like how they make great compliments and a sudden quick critic that justify the low grade

"Vertigo justifies the title of bes film ever with good pace and a mystery that captures the audience attention, topped with great acting by the lead actors, but I really didn't like the animated sequence" 20% score

Tony Stark: can someone get me some vodka, because this grapefruit's looking pretty salty, dog

Iron Man: "Alright... all bug-themed heroes, please stay out of this, you're not going to be of any help to us."
Spider-Man: "Umm, actually, Mr. Stark, spiders are arachnids, so me and Widow can stay."
Black Widow: "The kids right you know..."
Iron Man: "Uh... is there anything going on between you two I should know about, because-"
Ant Man: "Hey, so if those guys get to stay in and fight, then I should be able to join in as well since-"
Iron Man: "No no no, none of you are fighting, so go on get out here, leave the battle to the big guys."
Hulk: *smashes*
Ant Man: "Oh man..."

2real2me

>"You have to learn Thanos, just because you believe yourself to be all powerful, doesn't mean we have to accept it. As individuals, we may seem small in stature, but together we can become more powerful than even you can imagine... and together,our voices will be heard! This planet wasn't built on war and destruction, it was built on equality and diversity and those two traits are exactly what we as a team embody, and as a team we are to tell you that, you are not our ruler!"

*bearded, balding nu males in the theatre stand up and applaud*

Won't happen because this is part 1
The kikes plan on bleeding out the fans for everything they got

>guardians of the galaxy is bigger than spider-man on the poster

It really is the worst timeline

imagine how kino this poster would be if it was painted like old posters and didn't have a cancerous color scheme

>guardians of the galaxy is bigger than spider-man on the poster
it's fucking fan-art, moron

Cap dies
screencap dis

...

It was a fun color scheme when it was just one movie. Now it's like every new marvel movie coming out is using it.

"No Glove..."
*rips the Infinity Gauntlet from Thanos's hand...*
"No love."
*puts on the Gauntlet and punches the shit out of Thanos.*

>Spider Man tries to web the gauntley off of thanks like in CW
>It's firmly secured on his arm, thanks grabs the web and Yanks it, sending Spider Man flying.
>Dazed and rubbing his head "Huh. I thought that would work a second time."

captain marvel will be the one to kill thanos

Fuck.
>Gauntlet
>Thanos

You might as well kill yourself now

Nice post from Reddit

The sad is, I could actually see that happening

this would, unironically, be kino

Holy shit my fucking eyes, that poster is a compositional nightmare

You guys should apply for a work there

>implying that it matters when someone dies on dc or marvel
Getting back Robin as redhood was for me the first nail in the coffin of the now well buried DC comics universe

i think this probably the answer . Their was a bit of snobbiness in older critics. Which is a good thing to be honest.
Now if something is """"fun""""" it gets a good review.

nice chink milkers
also everyone dies in Infinity War 1
Infinity War 2 is going to be a Stan Lee BioPic focusing on the early days of Marvel with kirby/ditko and the rest of the bullpen.
It ends with Stan Lee writing a way for the avengers to defeat Thanos

Kek I actually laughed at this one

Low test

after he becomes all-powerful death still doesn't love him so he gives up essentially and lets nebula steal the gauntlet

>DCShill is a shitskin
Lol

You mad white boi? Brown is the future :^)

>No shit Sherlock
>reaction shot from both benerburk and robert who are standing next to each other

Google translate left out a few words there, Pajeet

>tfw there will never be a movie starring the beyonder

Now I'M blue, da ba dee da ba DIE

JUST cheese my crackers up senpai

Isn't Black Ironman a paralytic now?

Comicfags will defend this

Idk what they'll say but I know what happens after the lengthy battle
>rey cuts off thangos head with lightsaber (guardians 3 will connect star wars to marvel universe)
>Tony stark reverse engineers lightsabers and sells them also builds two into his suit
>spider sense is revealed to actually be a force power
>peter starts new jedi order on earth
>avengers guardians and jedis all become known as "the force" because it's what binds us all together and only together can we prevail

unfunniest post itt

El oh el

...

...

PLEASE let this comic panel be the same as the movie, I will pay 100 bucks for that movie ticket

>hol up, so you sayin you some kind of Thanos?

>compositional nightmare

>Stan Lee writing a way for the avengers to defeat Thanos
>Stan Lee
OK, buddy. Reddit and their Stan Lee worship is thataway. I think they even have a Funko Pop(!) of him. Implying Kirby/Ditko weren't doing the heavy lifting for that chucklefuck.

Oops

Thanos is his own worst enemy. Literally the only way to beat him is to wait for him to fuck himself over.

>on da roos!

The fuck? Why is Marvel pandering to Australia now?