Worst Dialogue Ever

Post the most unnatural sounding dialogue you've ever read ITT

>Marvel actually published this
KAMALA ISN'T EVEN OLD ENOUGH TO VOTE. HOW THE FUCK DOES SHE KNOW ALL THIS?

By using the Internet.

Mike made her watch all of West Wing.

Is this a Bendis thread in disguise?

A Bendis thread?

This is no different than Hostess ads where Spider-Man would save the day with snack foods.

Why does she have stretchy powers?
It seems like they're going for a theme with this character...then they give her incongruent powers

But why does she assault some average working joe's while waving a flag?

>Thank you, Ms. Marvel! When do the polls open?
>Yesterday!
>Wait, what?

That doesn't sound unnatural. That's how you deliver that kind of information.

...

>Don't forget to vote for hillary goyi... I mean, guys

One of her powers is to turn into a living commercial

>Trump won because Kamala was too lazy to deliver this bullshit sooner
Hope you love the middle east, girlfriend.

TAKE THAT BACK

Those only lasted a single page. In the vein of Super-man giving Doomsday a snickers in the middle of an issue where he's actually fighting him

This goes on for half the book. I worry Waid's soap-boxing traits he writes for Kamala are rubbing off on her in the actual book

>tfw the only one of those people who got off their ass to vote was the construction worker, and he voted trump

Never build a political party around slacktivists.

Why do americans get upset at kamala giving clear instructions on how to vote in an in character way but don't get upset about 1940's propaganda depicting superman killing japanese soldiers?

Oh, I'm sure 1940s Americans got so angry by then.

It's always bothered me that so many people who don't perform the simple task of voting have the gall to complain about how the system doesn't work.
OF COURSE IT DOESN'T WORK, YOU'RE NOT DOING ANYTHING TO *MAKE* IT WORK

Because breaking the 4th wall this hard in a comic that isn't about breaking the 4th wall is shit?

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Shouldn't this have come out BEFORE the election? It's basically a PSA about voting.

>Shouldn't this have come out BEFORE the election?
Yes. But this is NuMarlel we're talking about here.

The Decepticon one gets posted all the time.

Here's the Autobot version.

...

It looks more like fashion parade commentary.

So this is like one of the best examples of why "show, don't tell" should be taken into account most times, right?

A Bendis thread.

>make comics like movies, not like comics
Shut up, Quesada.

I don't even care about American politics; Kamala has never before looked as beautiful as she did in her latest issue.

People like this are why shit like Ms.Marvel is still selling.

Is anyone else fucking sick of Kamala turning into a mouth piece? First issues of her run were basically just girl Spide-Man, she was just a teenage superhero but then CW2 and Champions happen and now she's some expert on social issues and justice and whatever the hell the writer is feeling like talking about today.

A thread about Brian Michael Bendis?

>below 30k
>selling

I actually like when comics dumb it down with the intention of teaching instead of mocking, and this comic is for teens and this is something they should learn.

but you're just trolling so fuck you

>30,000 sales means it isn't selling anything

selling =/= successful

A bit that's meant to be educational has unnatural dialogue?

You don't say?

Do you complain about after school specials too?

fuck you pizza guy get your hands out of your damned pockets

The dialogue is stiff
The election was 23 days ago
I just wanted Marvel to give Kamala her own stories instead of political bullshit and crossover bullshit.

Any incognotimous drawing

She's a muslim and according to Marvel there is nothing more American than that.

The writer?

Yeah, the comic book writer.

That's decent for a comic book nowadays

Eh. It's just a ham-fisted "go vote" comic. Nothing to see here.

I hope to god she gets deported in the comic. Right before it gets cancelled.

Huh.

Why would an American citizen get deported?

Because Trump, duh.

...

Trump will find a way

There's painfully little Trump/Kamala art, the true OTP

Here, have this

You are shooting yourself in the foot by calling every opinion you dislike to be "Sup Forums thus evil".
That how you lost the election, and how you will lose pretty much everything, because nobody likes manchildren yelling names at their problem. You boss, the bank, your familly. you will lose everything with that meme farting attitude.

Because those back-stabbing Nips deserved every bullet.

Wow.
Sup Forumsfags really are just alt-right tumblrites

I blame our primary system.

I didn't bother getting out and voting for Bernie here in CA, because by the point that our state was allowed to vote in the primaries it was clear that all the momentum (and super-delegates) favored Clinton. So the largest, most liberal state essentially got a candidate the other states had already chosen for us. (at least, that's the way I see it). Of course people stayed on their asses - they felt like they had no voice either way.

I like the electoral college, but so long as this stupid fucking Primary marathon exists one of them has got to change.

This fucker's gonna drop his pizza on the ground like a dumb asshole because he can't be fucked to use a single hand to hold it up.

Why do you think "show, don't tell" is a movie-specific idea?

"Show" doesn't even have to mean visually.

mate no just because I wanna jerk it to kamala doesn't mean I'm going to buy her comic or read the drivel covering up the pretty pictures

>two hougs lateg
Slowpoke.

Superman broke into people's houses, caused property damage and blamed the guards for stopping him in the first place, he didn't give a shit. Or that time he threw a bunch of corrupt businessmen in a mine and got them out only after they choked on gas.

Kamala is supposed to be taken seriously, doubly so because she's brown AND muslim. And even then the dialogue isn't even natural and you realize it's just the writer speaking through the character.

I should have taken a day off to vote for Bernie in the primaries.

You get it.

Wouldn't have mattered since the DNC was going to nominate Clinton no matter what.

It's complicated.

The system honestly doesn't work

You either live in a swing state or your vote doesn't matter

>next page
>"btw Vote Hillary! She's the right choice!"

That's construction worker totally voted for Trump.

"writing" is a bit of an exaggeration to what he does these days...

Why didn't you protest at the death camps for Japanese Americans, Supes?

Literally would not have made any difference.

Helped her parents study for their citizenship test? Paid attention in Social studies? Asked Steve about it?

why didn't superman just stop the nazis?

So he writes comics books?

...

I agree. It's really hard on women when their husbands and sons are slaughtered by the enemy

She paid more attention to this shit than half the US population?

Because Hitler had the Spear of Destiny.

>Death Camp
>implying

>turning dubs into a house of lies

Can't tell if you're being sarcastic. But I think it's true.

An exaggeration?

Yeah, Brian Michael Bendis writes comic books. He's a comic book writer, Brian Michael Bendis is.

Are you implying Imperial Japan didn't deserve it?

The primary differences are
A. Whose were funny
B. Hostess Snack Cakes are good for any occasion, Voting comes once a year and this came out after it happened

>Hey, I want you to go to this website. Go to vote.usa.gov and check it out. Just check it out. vote.usa.gov.

They were Internment Camps user. They were terrible places and it was a terrible thing to do to American citizens, but they weren't being put in gas showers.

Because they weren't death camps. Dead workers are unproductive dumbass

kek.

Imagine if fucking Bendis wrote this. It would have ran two issues.

Yeah, right.

And it's canon in every DCU.

You could literally post almost everything Hopeless has ever written.

They literally had no choice. The amount of characters simply didn't allow them to do that, specially when the whole cast could be shelved in 5 issues in favor of new members.

The problem is that this shouldn't be in a normal issue. Take the parts of the book dealing with voting, rewrite it and release it for free online a week or two BEFORE (not almost a month after) the election and call it the Ms. Marvel Go Out and Vote Special or something.

DINDU

>backstabbing
That'd be that faggot Wilson. Japs wanted a Racial Equality Clause at Versailles after World War I because, as an emerging world power who'd fought in World War I and trounced the Russians a decade earlier, they felt they deserved to be on equal footing as the Eternal Anglo, Eternal Frank and Eternal Burger.

Now by "racial equality clause" the Japanese were referring exclusively to themselves and no other non-whites or even other Asians and orientals. The Aussies (who had a whites only policy at the time) took offense forcing the British to vote against it. Wilson needed congressional approval for American entry into his proposed League of Nations and knew something with that name would scare the southern Democrats so he rejected it too. It still passed but then Wilson went and said "doesn't count, did I not tell you it needs to be unanimous :^)" and rejected it outright. This failed to win congressional support for American entry into the LoN which played a big part in making it an ineffective joke. This also had the effect of royally pissing off the Japanese who would then go on to develop a grudge against the United States that likely played a part in their decision to attack the US during World War II.

It's selling less than Gwenpool m8

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Any issue of Jem and the Holograms.

I wanted to like that comic so badly, but I just can't get past the dialogue.

That's what happens when you hire a literal amateur blogger with no writing experience.