You wake up as Hitler in early 1939

You wake up as Hitler in early 1939.

What do you do?

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kill myself

Take diversity sensitivity training

eva braun

Don't go for Stalingrad and focus on allying with the U.K.

invaed poland xDDDD

becomes allies with the United States

>all late nights playing Hearts of Iron will finally pay off.

Use my magic charisma powers to convince the allies to give me Danzig and the corridor in exchange for attacking Stalin and genociding the snowkikes

Actually gas the kikes this time. Gonna get blamed for it anyways.

find your grandparents to make sure you never get born.

Building a wall and make Poland pay for it.

Implement protectionism not expansionism forge alliances

The same thing, but dont help Italy on Africa or in Greece.

THIS, YOLO!!

>focus on allying with the U.K.
He tried many times

How would you do that??

>forge alliances
>implying hitler didn't try do that

he was cucked by britain, france, poland and even italy for a little bit until he went full REEE mode

Become homeless again because I can't speak german

Realistically? Rushing nukes/ICBMs would be a godsend.

Say to german americans create a nazi party in US and then make them vote in that party.

I doubt they would stood against their fatherland

I'd check out my "equipment"

These two

Also there isn't much I could do better other than not allying Italy and Japan, and it would have ended the same way regardless of what I'd do

Churchill and the US would have gotten their reason to attack sooner or later

this.

>begin developing nuclear bombs asap
>try to get US and UK against USSR

That'd be it, I think

tell myself not to invade Russia. Wait until the h-bomb is invented and raze the bastards then.

Bavaud 2.0

Making Switzerland great again

fr.wikipedia.org/wiki/Maurice_Bavaud

Scratching my Ball, like every morning.

Are you one of the Boys of Brazil?

(Real talk, that would have worked)

>You wake up as Hitler in early 1939.

>What do you do?

Brush teeth, get my best brown uniform, eat salad, shout from balcony.

Ditch the "aryan" stuff for "western civilization" so that I can breed nationalist movements in other countries like the United States and France and Britain and Russia in order to keep Europa United into the post-industrial space age of the 21st century, rather than starting a war and getting my country and Europe in general cucked and destroyed due to some misguided pursuit of "lebensraum" and Jews to kill for no reason.
Then I would fuck the shit out of Eva Braun

Final solutionize Sweden.

Get rid of Goering. He delayed the advent of jet technology.

Work on nukes with greater urgency.

He'd have to make it mutually beneficial for America as well.

If it were me, I'd tell them that after Europe was conquered, we'd start on Mexico, Cuba, etc.

I would also inform them about their Jewish problem (since most of them probably weren't aware of it at that point and were much less corrupt than people are today).

No idea what you're talking about m8
Google tells me it's a movie
What's to it?

>release all jews from concentration camps and give them cards claiming "I'm sorry!"
>legalize gay marriage because love is love
>cut down on our military spendings
>widen the criteria needed to be aryans to include people with brown hair, and caucasians of any color (poo in loos, pakis and arabs are now aryan)
>open borders to all aryans
>denounce italy and japan
>promote conservative, Islamic values
>get a gender reassignment surgery
>legalize drugs

so much this

Nazi scientists made genetic clones of Adolf Hitler and raised them in Brazil in an attempt to create a new Hitler to lead a new reich.

It's centered around a Nazi hunter who heard about a load of men getting murdered via a phone call. All the men are murdered at the same age as Hitler's father was.

epic upvote

holy fucking shit
does the ivory coast even have internet?

I'd do everything the same, except I'd catch the BEF at Dunkirk and execute a hundred of them on camera every hour until the British surrender.

>delay declaring war by 1 or 2 years and begin to make scientific breakthroughs into jets, rockets, nuclear weapons, synthetic petroleum, and armor.

>Build and stock air raid shelters for the entire german population.

>Build up the fighter-interceptor wing of the airforce such that any bombing raid would be complete suicide.

>Deploy radar sytems and heavy concentrations of Flak88 guns between population centers and enemy air bases.

Hitler's one mistake before the caucuses was underestimating the brutality of the jew, he thought this would be a civilized war and civilians could be left out of it.

>civilians could be left out of it.
tell that to the jewish citizens

If I were him, I'd immediately become allies with America.

I'd do this by making it as mutually beneficial for America as possible.

I'd tell them that after Europe was conquered/defended, we'd start on Mexico, Cuba, etc., then allot all the annexed landmass to America so they could expand their already industrious empire they were working on.

I would also inform them about their (((problem))) since most of the politicians back then weren't as corrupt as they are today.

Back then America did what was best for America, not its (((allies))). I think America would look at it almost as a business opportunity.

build nukes

Grow a second testicle. Then teabag eva

>Cry.
>/thread

build a time machine and kill Napoleon

>believing all sides didn't inter the potential enemy aliens
Canada and USA put the Japs in camps.
>believing the 6 gorillion jews meme
pic related, not to mention the fuel required to burn all of the jews to dispose of the evidence would've won Germany the war. (18million litres of oil, 192million m^3 of natural gass, or 600million kg of wood)

Build the biggest fucking wall the world has ever seen

fall back to sleep and hope I wake up as a billionaire in the current year.

Win.

wait for Russia to invade Poland first

Ally with poland and the rest of eastern Europe and invade Russia their army was total shit in 1939.

Ally with the Jews

I second this, extend the siegfried line around germany and add massive arounds of radar and AA cannons. Just make yourself a little Northkorea in the middle of Europe and let the jews destroy the rest of the world.

>Dies! Dies! Eine Million mal dieses!

Change my mind and start promoting diversity in the 3rd reich.

Tell both Italy and Japan to fuck off.

Bring back the Kaisers to increase baby birth

>Gas the Jews
>Nuke Future Israel

I don't betray Russia, focus on getting oil big time.
Don't fuck with Japan to avoid having war declared on me by the US, and keep the u-boats circling the UK. I would do my damnedest to stopt he UK form giving the US all those sweet sweet secrets.

Tried but GB jew leaders said no.

Sauce?

>Realistically? Rushing nukes/ICBMs would be a godsend.

Try rushing the Me-262 into production instead. Nukes won't do any good without an airforce to deliver them.

If Hitler made his conquest a business opportunity for America, I think we'd be living in glorious times.

Negotiate a peace treaty with Britain

If it was any earlier I'd focus on subversion rather than diplomacy like encouraging communists in US while further secretly fucking up balkans.

Sauce to what the Pic or the resource requirements?
The resource requirements are based on the 100 MJ energy requirement to remove all water and turn a body to ash. (just google energy required to cremate a human body) then multiply it by 6million.

The oven times are based on the number of jews claimed to be processed by Auschmeme's ovens and what modern crematories can do.

+1
Good one, but he didnt knew how fast they gonna be invented
Party time! Reeeee
Merkel fuck off!
Mein fuhrer 2.0

Use my last wish to turn everything back to normal

He tried. Many, many times.

Proactively bombing the shit out of them, Dresden style, would have been better in hindsight.

Holocaust and win the war.

Nice. Then Invade Poland to 'save them' while getting good boy points with the allies. Stalin mentions German-Soviet pact say it's all lies and slander. Dispose of Ribbentrop quickly and quietly.

Witty .. I keked..

Same thing I do every time I wake up. Masturbate.

There was a American branch m8. The German American Bund

I'm all but certain the reason hitler didn't execute the war-winning move at Dunkirque is because he sent terms to the Brits and was waiting for the answer, the brits knew the timeline wouldn't be enough to keep their equipment so they left their guns/armor and fled within the deadline. Churchill jewed Hitler's humane nature.
(captcha: select all of the Juice)

Eat dinner. Bout the time I wake up anyway. Then browse Sup Forums... oh God what a horrible/wonderful world 1939 was. Don't care for all the black and white though thank God colour was invented in the 60s.

Have all the conspirator generals shot and take over the military myself. Proceed to easily win war.

Be the bigger guy and only take Germanic clay. Keep up my alliances and save Europe without harming my European brethren.
Create a European Union, but do it right this time..

When the pact with the soviets kicks in, Let the soviets take poland without going in yourself.

Appeal to the western powers that germany just wants to liberate the poles from the ebils of communism.

Hopefully get britain and france on our side. push on moscow and take it early on.

don't start a war with england or france until Italy is ready. since taking full control of the Mediterranean is key.

Don't start a retarded war for no reason.

>Document heavily the humane treatment of all political prisoners/POWs

>Annex Israel and deport all Jews in Europe there after they have worked off / paids for the expense of doing so

>Use Gas warfare against the russians to force a stalemate so no German qt 12yo's get raped to death

Oh, and found Israel without harming a Jewish hair.
Thus making the Jews eternally in my favor, and no one can ever call me an Anti-Semite.

He didn't. The Brits wanted war. Read this book

Don't shoot Rommel and Guderian this time FFS, they only joined the coupe because Hitler was interfering in their victory plans.

After confiscating their labour / estates to pay for the development of this plan of course.

The German women used to say "better to have a Russian on your belly than to have an American above your head"

They said that before the Russians poured boiling water on their hands and peeled their skin alive, I think

Take the true redpilll and attack the real enemy: Germany.

>No WW2 means no holololocaust means Jews have no pity story to fall back on
>No Nazi means no buzzword to use againt rightwing ideology
>No WW2 means Chinks are replaced by superior Japs.
>No Germany means no EU means no shitty "migrant crisis".


And so on.

Where were you when you realised that Nazi Germany despite its good intentions is litteraly what has almost destroyed the white Christian western civilization.

Make sure Japan attacks USSR instead of China.

Not an arguement

Join the Wehrmacht.

Hitler tried multiple times to prevent WW2. If you're going with that line of reasoning you should be blaming Chamberlain and Churchill for refusing what even they admitted were generous peace offers, including before the war. They went to the trouble of making sure that some of Hitler's offers never became public in the U.K. out of fear that the people would find them too reasonable and thus not want to go to war.

> jews
> eternally in non-jew's favour
Pick 1

> help found Israel
> give them billions in aid per year
But what have you done for us today, goy? Nothing? Oi vey, it's like another shoah!

THIS.

Record the entire hybrid theory album by linkin park and make millions
Pretty much, just form linkin park before they could.

>Jews made UK hate Germany

A generation earlier Britain fought the bloodiest war in history against Germany, due to German aggression (whatever revisionist historians say). And yet still, in the 1930s britain was willing to extend the hand of friendship to Germany. We we willing to look the other way as Germany violated the treaty of Versailles.

But that wasn't enough for Germany.

Germany demanded that they be allowed to annex the ethnic Germans in the Sudentenland. So, in the interests of maintaining friendship and peace with Germany, our Prime Minister flew to Munich and basically agreed to all Hitler's demands, with only the stipulation that Germany wouldn't occupy the rest of Czechoslovakia.

And do you know what they did next? That right, they threw our generosity back in our faces and occupied Czechoslovakia anyway.

Fuck them. They showed the value of an alliance with Germany. They killed millions of us in WW1 and then they just expected us to bend over and take it when they started getting up to their same old tricks all over again.

The only regret isn't that we didn't ally with Hitler, it's that we didn't declare war in 1938 when we could still have salvaged a scrap of honour from the whole thing.

Oh, and fuck Sup Forums's love for that backstabbing little half-jew failed artist, whose stupid little half-thought-out schemes managed to break European power for ever.

Do some meth and jerk off while my niece pisses in my face, then call it a day.

>if you genocide your enemies they win
>if you war against your enemies they win
>if you annex your enemies they win