Things in everyday life and work that are usually handled very weirdly or poorly in film and TV

Things in everyday life and work that are usually handled very weirdly or poorly in film and TV.

Example:
>Food.

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youtu.be/86tGc09DhMY?t=239
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>people on television tell the waiter what they want instead of pointing to the menu
>conversing with each other when the waiter comes back with the food instead of becoming dead silent.
it's like the writer's have never been to a restaurant

>waiters in films never wait until you've just had a mouth full of chewy food before they ask how it is.

>*takes a single bite before leaving the restaurant

>"I'll have the steak"
>"sir, we offer 20 kinds of steak please be more specific..."

Just do your job! And bring me a beer with that

>GIVE ME A BEER
>What kind?
>BEER BEER

>normal person driving to a normal location with no time pressures.
>tyres screech as he turns to where he wants to go
>goes up the slight ramp to the car park so fast the suspension bottoms out and he probably scrapes the bottom of his car
>pulls into the parking space at 20mph and breaks hard

American driving is pretty shitty from when I've driven there but it's not THAT shitty.

phone calls: actor calls someone and immediately pretends to be talking to the person they called without even giving enough time for there to have been a single ring.

parking spots are always available right outside the front entrance

youtu.be/86tGc09DhMY?t=239

And almost no one says goodbye

>person rings a doorbell
>it is immediatly answered like if the person was just waiting behind the door

Also conversations are completely stilted so they can exposit what the other person is saying.

>Hello?
>What? When did he fall down the well Lassie?
>Alright
Hangs up

All this would be so easy if you just played the sound of the other person's voice as well.

>people on television tell the waiter what they want instead of pointing to the menu
Is this because americans cannot read?

>character orders a "coffee" or a "beer"

>character orders a "coffee"

What's wrong with this?

>what is passage of time sped up to move plot along
>wants awkward silences and standing there with nothing happening in show where costs million dollars per episode

Coffee is pretty normal. It's the beer that's retarded

You usually specify what kind of coffee. If you go into a Starbucks and ask for "a coffee please" you're going to look retarded.

In any place I can just order beer and they give me their standard beer, I do that all the time

We all understand why they do it you idiot. That's not what the thread is about.

I have never once seen someone in a Western pay for a drink

>If you go into a Starbucks and ask for "a coffee please" you're going to look retarded.

That's because nobody goes to Starbucks for their disgusting burnt coffee.

>they give me their standard beer

Must be a European thing. I've never seen an American bar with a "standard beer".

Beyond specifying milk/creamer/sugar preferences, I don't think I've ever been asked about a type of coffee. I'm not sure what that even means, unless it's just those things

>$300m dollar budget
>thousands of CGI people employed
>photo of character appears on desk in movie
>looks like babby's first shoop

some of my relatives act like this is normal and if i dont come to the door within 2 seconds they act like i'm just ignoring them and start freaking the fuck out screaming and pounding on the door and windows. i wish i could kill them

decent places will expect you to specify americano or espresso at the very least

Yeah I live in europe, most of them also have a banner somewhere showing what brand their standard beer is

i dont know if that guy is a troll or what but there's always one dude in every thread explaining common sense shit in the form of a jeopardy question like he's talking down to a toddler

Makes sense. Usually American bars will have a certain brand on special but you still have to specify.

that's because it's a different team responsible for that

It might just be that there isn't much of a coffee culture where I live. I know some Americans take it pretty seriously, I've seen people disgusted by the idea of drinking instant for example

Probably a niche one but garbled expressions and idioms are never depicted in film or tv. In any given day I will hear at least one person say something awkward like 'you need some pain to get gain' or 'looking up the wrong tree', but these are almost never used in visual media. Everyone is scripted to sound coherent all the time which breaks verisimilitude for me sometimes

Instant coffee really is gross though. My parents just drink drip coffee from an old mr coffee maker and they are disgusted by instant coffee

I've never heard of this. Even if they do have standards on tap, they will always say the brand it is

If you get used to proper ground coffee you can't go back. Nescafé et al is dogshit. People who drink that stuff usually put milk in their coffee which masks how horribly acidic it is.

I hate this shit, it's always some faces pasted onto old photos

...

They do that all the fucking time in comedy. They actually use it way too much. Is this bait?

No one ever stammers, everyone hears everything the other person has to say and no one else struggles to remember the name/word for something.

Don't forget that whoever is driving is constantly swerving the wheel left and right, when in reality you'd be keeping it mostly straight with minute adjustments, and when you're actually turning it would be one large, smooth motion.

Well dialogue in general is nothing like real people's speech. Real speech is nonstop pauses, "uhs", slang, uncertain sentences, etc.

But that's hard to write and isn't really great to listen to.

I was thinking more in a dramatic sense but yeah you're right, they do do that a lot in comedy. It's more the lack of it in serious ''''''realistic'''''' stuff that annoys me as it's something you encounter a lot in 'real' life yet never see in dramatic pieces that aim for realism

Beds and Bed sheets

>cockney rhyming slang is shown
>They always say the rhyming work

That's not how it works.

Or the opposite, where people step only five feet away to "talk privately" and the other person doesn't appear to hear anything they say.

When two characters are talking and then it cuts to them in the car or something hours later and the conversation never missed a beat.

youtube.com/watch?v=wuypE6ISPag

phone calls where you can't hear what the other person is saying.

I remember the cockney episode of QI. I could only understand about 25% of what they were talking about

Platinum answer. A need to go to toilet.

>character looks down at a phone whilst driving
100% chance of accident or near miss
>character is on the phone holding it against their side with their shoulder
1% chance of accident or near miss

I like to actually pay attention to what characters are physically doing in scenes, even the extras. So often you realize what they're doing makes no sense or they're actually doing nothing, because you're supposed to just pay attention to the dialogue.

The worst offender is science or engineer or mechanic type characters, who are working on something while talking. Almost all the time they are just fiddling with a prop while they speak but it's presented like they're working.

It's almost always a screwdriver, too, for some reason. I guess because it's an easy motion to make without thinking about it, and it's a small tool that won't get in the way of the shot, but watch for it in future.

Screwdrivers, once you start noticing them they'll be everywhere, especially in TV.

I always wonder what happened in the intervening time.

Most people in the UK don't know proper cockney rhyming but have unknowingly picked bits of it up.

Leads to an interesting situation where you have 'berk' which in general usage is a light hearted alternative to "idiot".

However it's actually derived from Berkshire Hunt = Cunt

>go into a Starbucks
I SHIGGY DIGGY
May as well start using Macintosh for everyday life.

Art is usually shit in movies, it's like they have no idea of what's going on out there it's either try hard photos, rip-off Pollock or emo portraits.

>any scene in a factory
>guy with an angle grinder is making sparks

Isn't Budweiser a standard American beer or am i too used to see it in movies? Always thought Bud is like Fosters in Australia.

Sometimes it's a screwdriver, sometimes it's a spanner. It's always useless work.

Another common one is using a solder and it creating a huge spark that causes the person to jump back. You'd never solder a live circuit or one where you haven't drained the capacitors if you're even slightly competent.

I can only guess that one has come from some writer seeing someone incompetent use probes to measure voltage and fucking up and no understanding what he was doing.

>Things in everyday life and work that are usually handled very weirdly or poorly in film and TV.
Intimate kissing scenes.
I can't stand that annoying wheezy slobbering, sucking noises sound.
It's like they shoved the mic under their chins.
It's just pure cringe worthy.

And welders, welding....something.

watch manchester by the sea user, you'll love it

The Flash on CW is the worst for this. Literally every scene with Cisco or Harrison or any other science character, they are always using a screwdriver on some device or weapon. Is the thing nothing but screws or something?

Most bars have all the typical domestic brands on tap which is Bud, Coors and Miller.

That's because you are used to the 'virgin kiss' and are intimidate by the chad make out

I swear if I was ever making a movie, even if so many would tell me it's pointless and no one will notice, I would make sure all the actors know what the fuck they're doing as far as their job in the film is. If they're a mechanic, someone is teaching them something to actually do with a car instead of just "spanner, grindgrind".

...

>Things in everyday life and work that are usually handled very weirdly or poorly in film and TV.
Sirens in the distance.
How many times in movies are the cops about to show up in force after the hero stops the bad guys.
(every lethal weapon movie)

Not at all.
It's over dramatic bullshit. No one kisses like that.
Except maybe you kissing your dog and known drug addicts.
Addicts slobber, drool and drink beverages as if they are dying of thirst.
kys

lol virgin

>No one kisses like that.
Some people like sloppy make out sessions. It's a thing. And if there's a normal and an intense way of doing things you can bet TV's gonna go for the intense way.

Do Americans really not order a beer?

Chad.
Virgin.
>Typical Sup Forums faggots.
>Look mommy! I'm special!
(Here is your participation trophy assholes)

>No one kisses like that.
How the fuck do you know that?

>character doesn't have to repeat his restaurant order three times because he can't stop fucking mumbling

>disgusting food
>slurp and splat noises constantly

>person is fat/hungry
>loses all table manners, shovels down food in a messy way, takes a massive gulp from drink before swalling his food, speaks with his mouth full etc.

Hungry people don't do that shit and I've never seen a fat person who wasn't incredibly self conscious eating.

Even shitty American dive bars generally have about six different beers on tap and more in bottles. Ordering “a beer” makes you sound like a retard.

Found the kissless virgin.
There is nothing "hot" about being slobbered on you idiot.

"A" beer?

You failed to actually answer my question.

I always thought it's some sort of a sponsorship deal between the brewery and the pub. Drinking holes here in Finland usually have some domestic beer advertised right on the facade and it's usually the cheapest beer they sell.

Pic related, two Olvi ads printed on the sign of a punk rock venue.

Yes.

Well obviously ordering a beer means you want the cheapest one on tap since you don't care about which one that is. Simple thing really, would think even Americans could comprehend a concept like that.

I have never seen any bar not say what beer you are getting. Even on tap (given they have several on tap), if you asked for cheap they'd say "____ ok?" or whatever.

This is because televisual media is intended to symbolically represent the events of life rather than be an actual facsimile of them.

>character in cab
>drivers asks for the money
>they instantly take the money from their pockets and gives it to them
This never happens.

Literally don't know what half the bars I visit are even serving since I always just order a beer and they all taste the same.

KEEP THE CHANGE

Who does this?
Gimme my fuckin change.

>Things in everyday life and work that are usually handled very weirdly or poorly in film and TV.
Fight scenes.
Guys getting punched out by one hit.
Guys dying instantly from knife stabbing.

>woman in labour
>dramatic race against time racing to the hospital
>everyone is running around panicking
>the husband has his fingers crushed
>utter chaos
>baby is out
>mother holds it straight away, it's dry and clean
>Afterbirths don't exist.

pleb

Also people being knocked out with zero ill effects.
Hit someone with a pipe or a bat or something, they're fine an hour later, just hold your head for a moment.

Also it's like a 4 month old baby.

>woman gives birth as some music is ending
It's like people don't know anything about labour

>they're fine an hour later, just hold your head for a moment.
And never missing any teeth, no swelling or black eyes.
>Yes hollywood we must be stupid.

Often the cheap domestics are equally priced though. It’s better to say you want what’s on special. Just a tip if you visit America.

Or you know, cracked skulls, concussions, brain damage, etc.

>out of the womb
>baby has a head full of hair and eyes open

Yeah, newborn babies are like bloodstained raisins, they are freaky looking. Guess they're not gonna go get a 3 day old baby for the shoot but still, at least don't have the baby clean like it's a diaper commercial.