Its an americans think they know good food episode

>its an americans think they know good food episode

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youtube.com/watch?v=OQsJRlPiEVw
youtube.com/watch?v=3YARSNMNnP8
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>it's a frozen leftover episode

Throw. Out. Everything.

literally nothing wrong with that pizza. any food will look gross if you pull it apart with your hands and spill it off your plate

Gordon Ramsey doesn't know how to just enjoy food

Shut the fuck up.

Kys asap

>it's a the owners have inherited the place episode

The concept of American food is "make you feel full" it's all they know

>Gordon Ramsey doesn't know how to just enjoy food

This line here reminds me about some article written by a guy who moved to Chicago from San Fran for a year or two, and as he left he wrote this thing giving his "hot take" on Chicago as he was leaving and in it when he talked about Chicago people he told this funny little story about trying to get his flirt on at a Chicago bar early on.

>super awesome SF guy spots a table with 3-4 chicks and no dudes
>buys himself a beer and walks over to the table like HI I'M [NAME] AND I JUST MOVED HERE FROM SAN FRANCISCO AND BOY THESE WINTERS SURE SUCK DON'T THEY??
>"uh [name] sorry but we're not interested"
>*stands up and picks up his drink*
>"YEAH WELL JUST SO YOU KNOW I DIDN'T WANNA FUCK ANY OF YOU ANYWAYS!!!!"
>dude notes how saying thatade the chicks seem legit bothered after he got up and left, like they couldn't believe he actually didn't want them

And of course he blamed it on Chicago for having different customs for meeting chicks at bars and rah rah rah, but holy shit if I was those chicks I'd probably be cracking the fuck up like "holy shit how gay is this guy? He *IS* from San Francisco, you know..."

>haha this the small pizza
>haha it's 80 dollars
I would eat that piece of shit pizza because I'm a slob and not a chef but not at that price

>eating oil

if you don't like oil then don't eat pizza you humongous turd

I read his lines in a flamboyant voice.

I mean pretending to be gay when you get friendzoned is probably a pretty common tactic in san francisco

Damn that looks like a great 'go 'za

It's a heavily edited to make it look like Ramsey is some kind of wizard episode.

I bet he is the same kind of person who constantly talks about how much he likes going to "dives" and "hole in the wall places" while wearing a $500 cardigan

It's too greasy and the crust is too thick, if I remember correctly he actually ordered the thin crust here. Either way you're pretty much right though, it looks alright but you'll get a bunch of autists here that think because this chef is also a celebrity and overreacts they should also say the exact same things he did.

What the fuck was his problem? Pizza looked fine, looks like something I'd eat during one of my elevenses.

>tfw gordon actually likes the food once
youtube.com/watch?v=OQsJRlPiEVw

youtube.com/watch?v=3YARSNMNnP8

Jesus christ that was painful to watch, thanks user

Was Daniel the most JUST guy on Kitchen Nightmares?

i went to a conference in merka one time, i remember all the yanks going on about how good all the food was while i was thinking its the most bland shit i ever tasted.

the cheap chocolate bars and smoky texas bbq is pretty damn good though

I just came home from culinary school, this is physically cringing, how can people be so oblivious.

T H I C C

Nah mate that pizza is garbage. I've made better pizzas by following a recipe online and I'm shit at cooking.

>tfw he was cucked by his gf and his dad

feels bad man

>It's too greasy and the crust is too thick
these are not valid complaints for pizza

Seriously? I degrease all my pizza.

>amerifats are incapable of criticising food no matter how greasy, undercooked or disgustingly bad for you it might be
why am I not suprised.

if you're that autistic just make food at home.

This.

Have you eaten pizza that wasn't dipped twice in ranch swimming in grease?

>if you pull it apart with your hands
>implying pizza should be eaten with cutlery

Fuck off you’re making me hungry

Gosh what kind of monstrosity is that , Mamma Mia macaroni Dio porco

I use a fork and a knife on my pizza. I'm not a barbarian like some people.

...

Fold the pizza like everyone else you autist.

Is this the thread where we pretend the show isn't scripted?

...

If you need cutlery to eat pizza then the pizza you're eating is 100% sloppy undercooked garbage. But my guess is that you're american so you're used to eating out of a trough anyways

I've never seen an American use a knife and fork to eat pizza unless it was some Chicago monstrosity

why would i want to?

>100% sloppy undercooked garbage
Like the pizza in the OP? I agree, that is a shit pizza.

Seriously that pizza looks like utter garbage. I can tell from the picture that I would get sick from eating undercooked food if I ate that.

found one

I'VE NEVER SEEN A THIN PERSON DRINK DIET COKE

Because it tastes disgusting.
When I eat pizza I want to taste the pizza without it competing with mountains of grease and ranch.

Jesus Donald. You had one job.

thats not enough. silly europoors havent learned what decadence is

I'm American you dumb faggot.

RED
WINE
CHOCHOLATE
SAUCE
youtube.com/watch?v=ymkxaRpMd4s

>Americans don't know real pizza

There's literally nothing wrong with that za

is he at fucking famiglia?

Fuck I hate mushrooms.

Why the fuck does anyone like mushrooms? They're fucking disgusting.

>CROONCHA

>his gf

What? Damn, nigga just can't catch a break

Found the disgusting Amerifat.

This guy man. Every fucking time.

American Masterchef is some of the best unintentional comedy on TV. British and Australian MC is professional-tier amateurs creating dishes that wouldn't look out of place in a Michelin star restaurant. Burger MC is literal burger-tier dishes. They have Campbell's fucking soup in the basic ingredients larder.
There's a deep truth about Murica in here somewhere.

You know who fucking sucks? Bobby Flay.

this is pasta btw

Epic pasta

>can't shut up about food
Typical Amerifats.

>implying Trump is bound by the pizza etiquette of this mortal coil.

I don't eat pizza very often, but when I do I get triple cheese and light sauce. Becomes more cheesy bread with toppings than pizza. I love it though. Just have to pig out infrequently, otherwise you become fat and smelly

Put less garbage on it and eat more pizza. Fucking amateurs.

>he eats the crust first

that's it i'm a Hill-shill now

That was when stuff crust was first invented.

Haha yeah those americans dont know how to make a TRUE and HONEST italian pizza

I eat my pizza sideways, taking alternating bites of the main body and crust. This ensures that I am not left with just the crust at the end.

>plate arrives
Right, thank you darling
>starts prodding at food with knife and fork
Christ.
>messily cuts up meal
Look at that.
>waterphone screech, starts dissecting food like a science project
Dear oh dear.
>brings camera in for a close up
Unbelievable.
>squishes food into plate with the side of a fork
They've lost the plot.
>plants camera lens inside the meat
It looks like mother's bloody used tampon
>picks pieces off the food and starts flinging them haphazardly around the room
This is no way to run a business
>spills his drink on the plate
Awful soupy texture.
>presses food down with palm and smears it around
Bland, soupy, pretentious. I mean just look at THAT, it looks like it’s been fuckin’ stepped on!
>chucks plate into the bin
Right, what we need is to simplify the menu. Keep it rustic with fresh local ingredients.

>not eating a pizza with knife and fork
I agree with Trump here, eating with your hands is disgusting and savage. Only 3th world countries eat like that.

Why did they never mention that his grandfather, who he inherited his money from, was a organised crime kingpin?

In what world is this pizza alright. The crust is ridiculously thick and doughy looking, its greasier than a wop, and the overall color of it looks sick and undercooked. I honestly feel bad for anyone who wpuld even consoder eating this shit.

...

>its a gordon doesnt like good food episode
Fucking bongs pretending they know "le cultured food" FUCK OFF you pretentious cunts.
They just say meaningless phrases to pretend they know what their talking about
>"Oh this dish is the perfect blend of sweet and savory, the texture is nice and and looks good on the plate 10/10, but oh this pizza is a little too greasy for me ;-;"
None of that shit matters, all that matters when it comes to FUCKING FOOD is the taste you fucking angloniggers.

I dip the crunch in ranch at the end.

If I had some sort of sauce to dip it in I would certainly do it that way. My local 'za joints all charge extra for it though so fuck 'em.

This is 90% of food criticism.

>implying food in Bongistan isn’t all grey gruel and oatmeal

>just stuff it in your mouth and lube up your ass while you're at it
-Americans

yeah but thats why americans are so cool, they dont split hairs over the little details and just choose whatever thing with the most sugar and fat

>eating with your hands is "etiquette"
>eating with a knife and fork is bizarre and outlandish
Fucking Americunts.

criminally underrated post if I may say so lad

I suppose you use your fanciest non banned cutlery to eat kebabs or fish and chips?

What’s with all the insecure British white kids on here today? First that thread with Gosling and Ford and now this.

That we're happier on a whole and don't have to project our insecurities onto others? There is something to be said about America. For the longest time we didn't give a fuck and we were winning. Now all of a sudden we insinuate ourselves into everything, just like you, and we're falling apart. I for one still enjoy cassarole made the way my momma made it. Pyrex dish, bisquick, browned hamburger, cheese, and chopped onion. Cheeseburger cassarole, muthafucka! Smother that shit with ketchup, nigga!

bongs btfo

Costanza pls go.

Just realized I called the crust "the crunch." I am way more tired than I realized. Now I kind of want to start calling it that for real though.
>mfw Americans don't dip their crunch in ranch

I wasn't gonna correct you senpai I thought it was kinda cute

>Anthony Bourdain talks about how he loves this tiny hole in the wall bar
>in fucking golden gai
Golden Gai went from being exclusive to a tourist trap, that's about as much a hole in the wall as Jiro's sushi.

Not to culture signal, but I'm an American and I whole-heartedly disagree. Texture is just as important as taste. I don't want to eat baked beans, mashed potatoes, and plain hot dogs for dinner. That's fucking mush. Fucken gruel! Mashed potatoes, meatloaf with crispy edges, and peas, son! Do it right. Do it like the upper middle class. THE BEST CLASS, by the way. The worst thing to ever happen in this world was ready access to the internet for poor people. Now I have to hear your shit all day, when I used to read the books that the UPPER MIDDLE CLASS wrote. What did poor people ever write? Oh right... THE COMMUNIST MANIFESTO. Pantsless, cigar-smoking, couch-dwellers now. Fuck 'em. I hate Europe, but at least European poor people have culture. We let the poor people run shit here? Oh lawdy...
>I don't UNDERSTAND why you need onion AND celery with your mirepoix. You can make a perfectly good beef soup with a bouillon cube and a cheeseburger! Your ration request has been denied. NEXT!

>not using bleu cheese

Fucking awful pizza, too thick, doughy, I mean the dough is fucking raw, greasy, sloppy, disgusting, it looks like someone fucking blew their head off with a shotgun all over the pizza base. It's dog shit. It's fucking atrocious. Only a truly disgusting, insecure American would defend and willingly eat this trash.

I like my pizza like I like my women.
Thick and doughy.