MAKE THE BEST DEAL IN THE WORLD OR I'LL EAT YOUR SOUL

MAKE THE BEST DEAL IN THE WORLD OR I'LL EAT YOUR SOUL

I'll give you Mason

BURGER KINGS CHICKEN NUGGETS ARE 10 FOR A DOLLAR.

FOR 20 BUCKS, YOU GET 200 CHICKEN NUGGETS

I`ll kill the Russian ambassador for you, my lord.

I'll bring you the head of Silas Crumblegeist.

TIME TO EAT SOME SOULS

This guy might be alright-
>BK not McDs
NOPE

Two Whoppers© with small fries for $10 is clearly the better deal!

...

Here's the deal.
You keep the lantern lit and your family's souls will live on inside it.

I'll only kill you slowly if you don't eat my soul.

Absolute Control over 99 cubic meters of spacetime
In exchange for 99 billion souls.

>not lighting your own lantern
PLEB
NO ONE WINS
WHAT WOULD ANYONE DO WITH 99 BILLION SOULS?

Avoid crippling lonliness.

>>BK not McDs
Wow, I thought an all-knowing inter-dimensional alien wouldn't have taste that's COMPLETELY SHIT
THE DEAL IS TO ENJOY THINGS THAT AREN'T OBJECTIVELY AWFUL

Eat.

>YOU CAN'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO ANY MORE DAD, I'M A CAPSLOCK DEMON THAT EATS SOULS
Bravo Alex!

>No homework, no police, and no petty rules linking heat and light.
Literally just make it an escalation rather than a child.

I can hand you over millions of neets and neckbeards with a phrase that will get them to worship and obey you. You just need to give me immunity but also time powers like the big baby.

I'll take that infinite power and my own galaxy you offered stan in exchange I'll sacrifice a certain young boy for you to possess. I'll also have my galaxy worship you as their god, and make human sacrifices for your enjoyment.

that requires writing skill though

I'll give ya five bucks for the top hat.

Wow these memes are coming out fast arent they?

You can have all the planet, or what's in the mystery box.

The Dread Dormammu offers you his entire Dark Dimension if you tell me why children love the taste of cinnamon toast crunch. Should you fail you shall become subservient to the Dread Lord's mighty will, and I, the Dread Dormammu, shall show you how one conquers a dimension.

>Neets and neck beards
HOW ABOUT NO
BUT I ALREADY OFFERED STAN
LEE
HOW ABOUT A SMALL LOAN IF A MILLION DOLLARS?
I'VE COME TO BARGAIN
ALSO BECAUSE KIDS ARE PATHETIC LOSERS

How about I give you tree fiddy

ROCK

So you cannot answer me sprite!? By the rules of our bargain you must now bow TO THE DREAD LORD DORMAMMU!

Give me your power or I'll shoot your uncle

>OR I'LL EAT YOUR SOUL
>Soul

Yeah... We're gonna have a problem here.