Why are newspaper comics so consistently unfunny?

Why are newspaper comics so consistently unfunny?

When you're forced to make one once a week the quality dips big time

Compare them to Nedroid, which manages to stay 100% gold because Anthony only updates it whenever he feels like it

Counterpoint: The newspaper comics actually aren't unfunny, just bland and harmless. It's the people who keep having to draw attention to how unfunny newspaper comics are that ultimately overcompensate trying to be funny (usually by being edgy) yet eventually become less funny than a newspaper comic strip.

Aside from this, see also: David Willis, and a lot of other examples.

you mean seven times a week
same reason airline food is bad: 200 people, 2 bathrooms. if anything inflames a significant percentage of the sensitive stomachs, there will be a serious problem they can't afford to deal with.

i've had that park described to me extensively by friends and he's just plain lying. it's massive. stupidly huge for any kind of theme park. and it pisses me off because fuck harry butthole pussy potter

They used to be great. Don't know anyone who reads them anymore.

I still actively read Heathcliff and the Spider-man strips. Heathcliff in particular is better than any currently running webcomic and Spider-man has a nice nostalgic feel to it.

Heathcliff is in a league of his own, clearly.

Almost every other newspaper strip is hot garbage.

this gave me cancer

Heathcliff is the chemo

>just bland and harmless.
...and unfunny.

Reminder that big milf tits are the future of newsprint comics

Chillax dude, they're just wholesome little comics for old people to laugh at in the morning.

Fuck off
We don't talk about that

This can't be real.

Oh, you, my friend, have so very much to learn about Heathcliff.

It's him.

The comic speaks the truth

A big part of comics used to be about who could be the biggest asshole to the friends and/or family.

That went away after Winnie the Pooh though. Nobody could compete with that.

Don't you fucking shit talk about Ana, user

It got expanded but it used to be pretty small. And it is on the exact opposite end of the park from the entrance.

Cathy is the absolute worst.

Anybody who bitches about Family Circus or Marmaduke is a pansy.

People wrote in thank-you letters to my paper after Cathy ceased publication.

You're kidding, is Cathy THAT bad?

Bad Machinery