U.S.Avengers #2 Storytime

Haha time for BEST AVENGERS.

USA
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claiming the toni everyone will love before everyone else

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CAROL WAS FUCKING RIGHT.
If Tony Stark had had his way, THIS is what would have happened. Rhodey would have died anyway, and so would have everyone else. Fuck you Tony you self-righteous prick.

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Screw you! I wanted her!
I just hope some fanartist makes a hoodie/pajama outfit for her that is her Iron Patriot suit pattern.

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God damn! Toni is like a merger of Tracer and D.Va with Aikku her Mercy

>Faiza and Dane back together
>Faiza and Guillotine
I know it was just for one panel, but thank you Based Ewing.

It's amazing how much of a comic book-y way of clearing things up was.
>"But what if we hadn't used it? Would Rhodey still be--"
>"HI I'M CAPTAIN AMERICA FROM THE FUTURE AND FYI HE WOULD'VE DIED AND EVERYONE ELSE TOO!"

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>toni and aikku not next to each other
not very progressive marvel

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>>Overwatch

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even Marvel publishes Batman and Superman comics now

Especially since there was no reason not to go. If Thanos doesn't show up, you lose nothing, if he does show up, you get to try and stop him. If you don't prepare and he does show up, this shit happens.
Tony was only right about not using Ulysses for Minority Report pre-justice, but Thanos is already a wanted criminal and an active threat.

Can you do Venom next OP?

I'm a maschocist

>Bryce Wyne
Bravo Ewing.

>Son of the Green Skull
kek

>Nephew of the Plunderer
So Ka-Zar's son?

DO FUCKING GAMORA NEXT!

>Kang's firewall in time
Wait what? When did that happen?

>Tony was only right about not using Ulysses for Minority Report pre-justice
Which wasn't his argument until after Carol started doing it.

She's from the future, user. It hasn't yet.

>SHIELD Helicarrier Douglass
What's this one named after?

It's a plotpoint in Waid's All-new All-different Avengers and Adjectiveless Avengers.

You never see a girl in tuxedo with the tail.

Nah, it has. It's been brought up in Waid's Avengers.

Is Thanos considered a Mary Sue? His powers are so vaguely defined and depending on who's writing him he tends to always the most powerful and smartest being in the room.

>Faiza, Dane, Teddy and Guillotine
This is the team I never knew I wanted.

>Buy Roxxon
Last I heard, Roxxon was in trouble because their floating island base was crashed and their CEO was arrested for attempted mass murder and for being a Minotaur monster, right?
It does seem like a good window to buy into the company and gain control of it for when it inevitably recovers.

Goddamn, Toni is hot.
Also, Doreen is cute.

Only when it's Starlin and if Adam Warlock isn't around.

>Cosmic Cube 'Iso-Gauntlets'
Snazzy.

Thanos only managed to pull this off by using Cosmic Cube powered gauntlets.

if you look off to the right and in the bleachers, you'll see his nemesis is still standing.

as long as Deadpool is around, there is still time for him to trip on his own face.

Revolutionary War?
Is that like an elseworld?
I mean obviously the Revolutionary War was the founding of America, but I don't recall Steve Rogers being there? Did he travel back in time again but not pretend to be a Native American this time?

He's got the usual strength, durability, and energy projection package (at levels that put him above the Silver Surfer), and is also a supergenius scientist. Ewing brought up he was a telepath, but that's an ability he's probably used all of three times in 50 years. He can usually be beaten in a physical fight if you get multiple of Earth's heaviest hitters.

Steve's ancestor, man.

I'm really loving the multi colored AIM goons

How big of a boner did Bendis get from this page?

>implying Bendis reads comics

Wasn't this out like just last week?

Oh. Joy.

At the end of the Infinity, none of the heroes were able to touch him when he was just regular Thanos and another of Hickman's OCs was needed to save the day by putting him in amber.

>Deadpool is still alive

Bendis is aware of Captain Ameica Dani Cage actually, she showed up in Jessica Jones.

S.W.O.R.D.-vengers, man. Make it happen.

>An "Agents of S.W.O.R.D." book where everyone actually has a sword
FUND IT

>FOUR magic uberpowerful swords stabbing him at the same time
Why is this so awesome?

Squirrel Girl looks really cute.

So long American Dream.

This feels more on-the-nose than the outright Trump parodies.

Toni is like 10 years older than Aikku, she's literally a superintelligent adult Asian nerd who's abusing a young Nordic teen for her sick robotic fetishes.

She said that all Danielle Cages become Captain America, she said nothing of based American Dream (who also has a different codename). Our blonde patriot with blue eyes is still a thing.

This issue felt REALLY slow considering the first one and the previous New Avengers series. It wasn't bad, but eh.

Tony was wrong.
Carol was right (at first).

But... Steve's from a family of immigrants.

Yeah, he's never THAT strong normally.

2 weeks. It double-shipped.

This shit again? Also, how long before Ewing becomes a hated writer? Or did it already happen?

Set up if nothing else.

I will say, this book really is the oddest cast for a team book because none of the characters are huge draws.

This shit sucks, son. Not even a Ewing faggot fanboy, but his New Avengers was heaps better by issue 2. Granted; I'm sure it has more to do with editorial not letting anyone write good comics at Marvlel anymore what with all the goddamn relaunches and event tie-ins.

>I am the Shield

Can hear Steve, Bucky, and Sam getting jellus from here.

I think one of the factors is that you knew the characters from New Avengers.

Yep. It's a weird one.

Unf on Doreen for sure.

If you think EVERY greedy villain is a Trump parody, that may be a personal issue.

>Bryce Wyne jokes instead of taking the opportunity to have the hosting billionaire be 616's Nighthawk
Booooo

First time I've ever read anything with Squirrel Girl in it where she feels like a part of the 616. Waid's done the impossible - he's made a one-joke character look like it belongs.

All hail Waid!

>somebody is actually using Guillotine
Fuck yeah!

Not really, after the inevitable reset, they'll still be bumping around as Captain America, Falcon, Winter Soldier etc.

>Expertise has value--here, it loses out to ideology
subtle

MacArthur?

the bait or not the bait? that is the question

The rhetoric in this issue is pretty clearly aimed at Trump. I'm not sure why it's not triggering the same reaction among his supporters as the parodies usually do, but maybe they just think too highly of him to see it.

Frederick?

New Avengers made Roberto into a draw for me. And the first issue here made the new Red Hulk into one as well. I really like Ewing's books generally but this one left me a bit The first issue did a half-dozen issues and it didn't feel badly paced at all. This feels slow and spare, which is like the complete opposite of the previous series and this one's issue 1.

Other than a small handful of shitposters, no, The Turn has yet to happen for Based Ewing. Once The Turn has finished running its course on Tom King, the eyes of the contrarians will probably be placed firmly on Ewing though.

Can't wait for this to happen. It was long overdue

Yeah, the pacing on this is pretty weak. Usually Ewing is a lot better about that.

I'm pretty sure it's supposed to be obvious that he's a pirate. Just look at how he and his goons dress.

It's definitely a bit more subtle than other parodies, Spencer most obviously

>women in suits
THANK YOU BASED EWING

Also it's an unusually low pitch from Ewing, anyone else feel that? In the first place we don't see Skull's world too much and we don't see the time travel. What we do is the massacred hero scene we've seen 100 times before. And then Golden Skull's scheme it's... pretty boring for a Ewing book honestly? It's some robot duplicates and even the pirates are pretty low key. The whole things feels not very energetic from the guy who did fucking Zombo.

Just gonna chalk it up to 'your guy can always miss'. And we might start getting crazy with traveling to GS's world and seeing more of it, then back and back again and vice versa. So maybe it is set-up.

>Waid
This is written by Ewing. Not Waid.

So we know what happened in their world and how well it worked out. Dodged a bullet on that one.

Well, considering it's Ewing that shouldn't be surprising. He did create her afterall.