I just had the lamest birthday ever in my 25 years

I just had the lamest birthday ever in my 25 years.
What are some movies about a virgin loser and suicide?

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Suicide squad

Bladerunner 2049

>What are some movies about a virgin loser and suicide?
Your life biopic it would seem

>dude my birthday was lame now I'm going to kill myself

why are you such a faggot?

i literally forgot it was my birthday on my 26th, i only knew it was my birthday eventually because i got emails from forums

>caring about your birthday after 12 years old

I wish I have the budget.
Y-you too.

same but without the forums

Once I realized I was a loser in my early 20s I totally gave up on birthdays. No longer even recognize that day.

dude shut the fuck up. I got jumped by a bunch of spics on my 24th birthday, almost died. Please tell me your story so I can laugh.

About a month after my birthdays I finally stop fretting over being older and gain some relief knowing my birthday isn't coming up soon for a long while.

nah, he gets laid by a prostitute, he aint a virgin

...

>caring about having a "lame" birthday
>having a birthday at all
Nigger the last 5 years my birthday was an ordinary work day except I treated myself to topshelf booze when I went home. Fuck you.

why did spics jump you and why didnt you shoot them?

castaway on the moon will change your life.

Tell me your story first

>mom buys me a cake for birthday
>all it does is piss off my dad who then yells at her for half an hour while giving me the disappointment look
i just wanted to watch anime goddamn

The GOAT:
youtube.com/watch?v=CYSOjuGdmvI

>still celebrating his birthday in any fashion

must be nice

I was at a large river, drunk, hanging out with a few of my friends in California. There was a group of gangbangers off down the way and a few women of their group scattered closer to us. Apparently they thought I took a pass at one of their obese sisters (this I found out later as they were attacking me). I swam off to grab my drink and take a piss and they cornered me, my back to the river. Probably 6 of these degenerates all with giant chest tattoos of their area code. They were saying shit like "you think you can touch my sister homes?" One them swung at me and I had no idea what was going on. other ones started kicking me and trying to hold me down. Pushed me into the water. I thought they were going to fucking drown me but I scrambled and ran like a bitch. I found my friends and found the park rangers but by then they took off in their low riders. I had some cuts and bruises, didn't get too hurt just the implication of being drowned by a pack of dumb animals scared me.

sounds like mexico is sending their best

hopefully trump got them deported since then and they were killed by cartel.

>21st is coming up
>Thinking about spending the birthday money from my mother on an escort (gfe)
>Just so I can feel loved for an hour.

You think you can post in my thread homes?

Just go rape some slut user

get a sex change and fuck all the men you want

>caring about your birthday above the age of 21

jesus your pathetic

I just want to hold someone, m8.

Holding a dead body doesn't do it for you?

>waaaah waaah I'm a virgin i never stuck my peepee In pretty lady
Good, that means that you won't go to hell for having premarital sex

harsh post alas true post truly dark times upon us

They're often cold.

That's exactly what OP could do. He could probably get an escort to give him the Girlfriend experience.

Watch some Wes Anderson. I think 25 was my lamest too. It's because you are growing up. Don't worry that you are a man child and should have been grown up already. I will be 35 in December but just started growing up around 28 or 29. The wild is changing, user.

On second thought, watch LOTR extended version or even better yet read the books, find out why you were put on Earth, and fulfill your God given destiny.

tell me your fucking story now fag

fuck man that sucks. How fit are you? Hate to say it, bit maybe you need to gain some muscle and some confidence. A good smaller gym and personal trainer is worth every penny. But you gotta show up. Commit, and be a better you.

This experience with. The vatos and cholos is a good on. Fuck em man. Get em next time. Better yet, fuck his sister

>tfw two gfs right now

Fuck off /reddit9k/, you're fucking pathetic. Normalfag feels are way stronger than your shit tier abnormie feels too. You can't miss something you never had you mentally ill losers.

Working out and getting in shape is always good but that doesn't translate into fighting skills all of a sudden. If anything, it gives you a false sense of confidence.

Literally The Virgin Suicides

The only pathetic one here is you.

Sex does not equal love user. You won't find happiness in a random fuck

Your going to die one day normalshit, seriously reflect on this. Everything have ever done will be lost. All the slaying you've done wont matter. Nothingness awaits you. laughing at you right now.

Watch The last temptation of Christ and then go join a church change your life and get a new perspective of life Jesus died a virgin all this hedonistic modern way of living is probably fucking with your brain it's time to return to the old way

>Friend whining about how sad he is after breaking up with his girlfriend
>He's had a half dozen serious girlfriends over the years
>Everyone's giving him sympathy because break ups are so hard
>Tell them at least they've fucking known love so stop crying about it
>They all tell me that I just can't understand how hard it is
And that's when I stopped hanging out with them. Fucking normies.

>implying jesus didn't give all the whores he hung around with a good seeing to

So are you. Nice zero point non-argument and missing a bunch of words in your anger while supposedly laughing at me you fucking faggot.

Nah faggot. I just think it's hilarious how you whiny babies think your lives are oh so bad just because you don't get any pussy. Get fucking real.

>It reposted it

Top fucking lel.

This thread is now about food, you don't get to have a thread on my board anymore.

Kill your father. Marry your mother. Fulfill the prophecy.

Millennials born in the first world cannot be Christians. The internet killed religion, anyone 25 an under claiming to be a Christian is LARPing.

>has absolute shit taste in food as well

They were right and they're probably glad you're not around anymore to bring them down.

I've seen young cocky gymrat looking Chads get their shit rocked on multiple occasions because they were sorely mistaken about lifting somehow granting them the ability to fight.

>Seething

So what are you bros eating tonight? Me? I'm gonna have pussy.

I'm not larping I think you're view of Christianity has been infected by the baby boomers

My death will be a great release for me, the best thing to ever happen to me. You will be crying on your deathbed wishing it wasn't over yet.

Posting on Sup Forums should be a huge no for you then. Surely there are any number of Christian oriented message boards that you could be using instead.

now imagine how it would have gone down if you had been armed with a gun

Deus vult Brother xD

>I'm going to be miserable until I die and you won't so HA!

Wow, you really showed me. Fucking moron. Just kill yourself if life is that bad you absolute coward.

>browsing a worksafe tv and movie discussion board is haram
Are you a Muslim
I don't get that reference

Do the world a favor and release yourself tonight in the bathtub.

This board has porn posted on it multiple times every day.

>birthday
>over 25
AHAHAHAHAH fucking manchild

What kind of turbofaggot actually believes shit like this makes him better than anyone and posts it on Sup Forums thinking anyone gives a shit?

Even disregarding all the porn and black dicks that get posted here, the general discussion here is sinful as fuck. Again, wouldn't your time be better spent on Christian message boards?

Your going to die user. What does it actually mean to be dead? You will think about this before bed. There's no rick and morty or GOTs, just the void.

This. I haven't celebrated my bday in over a decade. There's just no logical reason to care.

Forget it, user. It's /reddit9k/.

Prostitute's aren't fun. They don't even try and pretend they enjoy it and when it's over you are the one who feels used

This
You're 25. What did you want, a bouncy castle?

What the fuck do you care anyway? Birthdays are shit. Congratulations, you survived another year and took another step towards you inevitable death. I fucking hate birthdays. They're just a fucking countdown for your mortality.

I know I'm going to die. Everyone dies. This doesn't make me miserable at all. Be honest with me, are you actually older than thirteen? If you are it is motherfucking embarrassing dude.

I feel things you normies wouldn't believe

this fuckin t b h

that's what you get for living in California.

Are you such a disappointment that you dont deserve cake?

Let's say you had friends and they all threw a part for you, that'd probably be a logical reason to care right?

NoCal resident here. Don't lump all of us in with Angelinos. It's beautiful up here.

Jesus is baneposting and sneed posting with the rest of us he loves when we laugh he laughs when we laugh
It's not blessed be the meak it's blessed be the NEET
watch Cool Hand Luke then maybe you'll understand how Christianity has been manipulated since it's inception
It isn't about arbitrary rules set in stone it's about the power of the spirit as a whole and the wholesomeness of a mans heart a man can be wholesome without being solemn

Who the fuck has a birthday party with anyone other than their friends getting drunk or something over the age of sixteen? What goddamn country are you losers from? Just call your bros and go to a bar and fuck some slut holy shit it's not hard.

I'd love a bouncy castle desu

You sound like the underage one here desu

>I don't care about dying maaaan
>everyone dies maaaaan
>you don't know my life maaaan

Fuck off already

Like being a virgin past the age of 18? You're right, I do find that hard to believe.

Your the one coming off as underage user. With your reddit tier taste.
>Sopranos
>Jack Nicholson
Did your dad pick out your taste for you? How many AC/DC T-shirts do you own?

Oh, yeah. I guess, I'd have some booze and try to enjoy myself.

I used to be more emotional in my late teens, but once you're over 25 you stop giving a shit as much.

Wow, way to completely put what that loser (It was probably you and you're samefagging like a retarded Jew because you know you got rekt) was saying on me. Get the fuck out and go back to your containment board you sub 80 IQ brainlet loser.

Yep, you're definitely samefagging and butthurt as fuck. Lel back to your containment board you unlovable pussy.

Fuck off reddit nigger

Bye.

This desu

This and unironically

>normies
>normies
Afraid of offending your cock sucking friends newfags!

Ok you shut the fuck up jack nicholson is a fucking saint you meager peasant and sopranos is kino so fuck you and whatever horse you rode in on buddy.

don't feel so bad OP, just remember there will ALWAYS be someone with a more fucked up life than you

>be 27
>spent my birthday raiding Tomb of Sargeras on LFR difficulty

JUST

>/r/incels calling anyone else reddit

You have to go back.

I didn't mean it ironically even tho it kind of comes across that way I'm being sincere

>Just call your bros and go to a bar and fuck some slut holy shit it's not hard.
90s born normalfag detected

>Retarded jew
>Wrecked
And your calling other people underage. LOL.

>motherfucking embarrassing dude.
Take a look at yourself.

Not gonna bother then.