So this franchise has three timelines now, two of each Laurie died in...

So this franchise has three timelines now, two of each Laurie died in. Halloween 4-6 is one timeline following Halloween 1 and 2, Halloween H20/Resurrection is the second timeline with it following Halloween 2 and ignoring 4-6. Laurie was supposed to originally kill Michael in H20 but for some fucking reason the idea of Resurrection came to their minds and they ended up killing her off in that movie, which Jamie Lee Curtis says was a joke to begin with.

Now we're having a third one that follows Halloween 1 and ignores Halloween 2? What the fuck? Halloween 2 established the sibling relationship between Michael and Laurie, so, what now? Are they not related anymore? Don't get me wrong, I'm glad Laurie is alive and all in this timeline, but holy shit.

Halloween 5 and 6 themselves have multiple timelines. Four and Six follow a timeline, but the multiple releases of six alter the 5/6 timeline.

What was Michael Meyers if he survived all of what he survived?

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You're forgetting the remake series.
Season of the Witch also takes place in a separate universe in which Halloween 1 and 2 are films.

I like the timeline with the exploding masks and the girl who starts banging an investigator right after her dad dies
it's the least "uuhh oohh uhhh thorn god coming to get ya" out of all of them. If I wanted that I'd watched friday the 13th, not this ripoff

The new one is only following 1, even 2 is being ignored

Also this makes Myers like 70 fucking years old

>caring this much

It was a B-slasher flick made to grope your girlfriend in the theater to, only reason it's popular is because of autists.

In English Doc!

i am so confused

>biological parents died in a car crash
>forced to live with foster family
>often having hallucinations and nightmares of her murderous uncle coming out to get her
>teased by kids at school since her family history has for some reason been made public
>murderous uncle actually returns from his coma
>murderous uncle hunts you down
>murderous uncle harms and kills your loved ones in the process
>witnesses your murderous uncle get shot down by police
>murderous uncle believed to be dead
>same night you somehow establish a spiritual connection with your uncle as he posses you to kill your adoptive mother
>you are now committed to a children's hospital, death mute and suffering PTSD from your near death experience
>because of the link with your murderous uncle, you find out he is actually alive and witness him murdering people in your mind
>murderous uncle returns to hunt you down once more
>murderous uncle harms and kills your loved ones x2
>you are hunted down and nearly killed until murderous uncle's insane psychologist beats him down and has him arrested
>cop assures you that everything is fine
>same cop ends up dying in a massacre inside the police station
>you check inside the police station to find out everyone is dead and your murderous uncle has escaped
>a cult which your murderous uncle belongs to kidnaps you
>cult holds you captive and you eventually get raped by your murderous uncle who you conceive a child with
>you are allowed to escape from the help of a sympathetic cult member
>the cult member that attempted to you eventually is killed by murderous uncle
>murderous uncle hunts you down x3
>you manage to hide your baby safely at the expense of being found by your murderous uncle
>murderous uncle finally kills via having your body pierced through and gutted by a corn thresher

Jamie didn't deserve this.

has any child character had a harder life in film

those mommy milkie titties

The hot Jewess with the huge tits in Halloween 3 was Woody Allen's girlfriend. He was in his late 30's at the time, and she was 17.

that one chick in 4 had some big ol tiddys

No one.

>Written by the E&D/Vice Principals Creator and Danny McBride
>Creator is directing it
>Retcons all the sequels that all went the way of the slasher film
>Brings back Jamie Lee Curtis
>Keeps the tone of the original
>Carpenter is producing and may compose

I have complete faith in this and already prefer it over 2 and the rest

Uh, Friday is a ripoff of Halloween.

I just realized Friday the 13th is a ripoff of Psycho but with the mother/son roles inverted.

This is going to be the Blade Runner 2049/Fury Road of 2018, calling it already.

Many of those points are bad though.

actually ripoff is a ripoff of ripoff

Imagine being Michael in that situation and having to be all like "damn, sister, you fuckin' fine, all sexy with your tight body and horrific androgynous monster face. I would totally have sex with you." when all he really wants to do is kill another 16 year old with his knife. Like seriously imagine having to be Michael and not only stand there while his sister flaunts her disgusting middle-aged ass in front of you, the favorable lighting barely concealing her stretched, almost ripped jeans, and just stand there, photo after photo, hour after hour, while she perfected that stance. Not only having to tolerate her monstrous fucking body but her haughty attitude as everyone tells her she's STILL GOT IT and DAMN, SHE LOOKS LIKE *THAT*?? because they're not the ones who have to sit there and watch her mannish fucking ass in mom jeans. You've been fucking nothing but a healthy diet of young babysitters for your ENTIRE CAREER coming straight out of the hospital. You've never even seen anything this fucking disgusting before, and now you swear you can taste the sweat that's breaking out through her clothes as she sucks it in to writhe it suggestively at you, smugly assured that you are enjoying the opportunity to get paid to stand there and revel in her "statuesque (for that is what she calls herself)" beauty, the beauty she worked so hard for with personal trainers in the previous months. And then the photographer calls for yet another set, and you know you could kill every single person in this room before the studio security could put you down, but you sit there and endure, because you're fucking Michael Meyers. You're not going to lose your future serial killer career over this. Just bear it. Cry inside your mask and bear it.

Kek

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Damn this thread got good quickly

SHE'S STILL GOT IT

Best posts I've seen on Sup Forums in almost a year.

DAMN JAMIE LEE CURTIS LOOKS LIKE THAT????

>Requel
LOOKS LIKE MONEY'S BACK ON THE MENU GOYS

Fucking. WOW