I was sexually assaulted and forced to continue a sexual relationship with Alison Brie...

I was sexually assaulted and forced to continue a sexual relationship with Alison Brie. This happened in early 2018 and continued for years afterwards, I hope.

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youtube.com/watch?v=ZW3lGbfyraI
youtube.com/watch?v=DJjCEdJTh8E
twitter.com/SFWRedditVideos

Can you go in more detail?

>she will NEVER castrate you with her teeth
just die in my sleep already
( ._.) ( ;_;)

Are you a time traveler?

I'm just a really good predictor of things Alison Brie will probably do.

#metoo

She made a pass at me. I was so humiliated & traumatized. It has taken me years to go back out of the house. Hollywood actresses are degenerates who use their power to embarrass males. I have dignity. I will not be treated like a sex object. Degeneracy must end.

That sounds like one of the best things ever though, OP.

In February 2018, Alison Brie cornered me and pulled down my pants, then jerked me off. She then pushed me onto the floor and sat on my face.

For reasons I cannot explain, I was unable to stop her making my cock spout and using my face as a seat.

Alison Brie made my cock harden against my will.

I feel so violated, its like she controls my penis.

Boob fetishists get out

you poor soul. the power women have over our penises is really out of hand, I demand reparations

*sighs*
I'll be in my bunk.

You lucky bastard. Brie is Sup Forums's prime waifu

fuck off faggot

>being new

Why does Sup Forums have such a boner for Alison Brie? I've been here for over 8 years and no actress has prompted more conversations and waifu threads than here

What's so special about Alison Brie?

>What's so special about Alison Brie?
she's hot
if you don't see it after 8 years, then there's nothing we can do. it's almost like people can have different tastes in women or something.

She's an extremely well balanced mix of cute and hot.

I was sexually insulted too! Shailene Woodley came up to me at a party while drunk and said I look like I have a small penis.

Brie is L O V E

Brie is L I F E

I feel sorry that you don't get it user.

She's one of those very few actresses in Hollywood who balances good looks, charisma and acting talent very well. The fact that she's very outspoken and quite comfortable being objectified adds to the IT factor.

She also does these cutesy stuff that Sup Forums types can't get over

youtube.com/watch?v=ZW3lGbfyraI

Honestly it also has a lot to do with how Dan Harmon conceived the character of Annie too. Has to be one of the biggest teases in the history of television

youtube.com/watch?v=DJjCEdJTh8E

There are plenty of hot actresses in Hollywood but why Brie specifically?

read it carefully, really carefully, and try to process it, brainlet
it's almost. you ready for this? it's almost like people have different tastes in women. you didn't get it the first time, but maybe you'll get it the second time. I dunno, do we need to say it a third time?

More than just that she's a pretty talented actress too but somehow doesn't do big movies. Seriously, go check out any of her videos on Youtube, she's always on acting mode.

There's also the voice factor. It's hard to accept that someone so hot voiced characters as diverse Unikitty, Diane Nguyen and Vincent Adultman

If people have different tastes then why does she specifically get brought up more than any other actresses.

Explain your specific fetish for this chick

Why is she always paired with the dorkiest characters? Both Pete Campbell and Dave Franco are dweebs.

>Explain
I already said she's hot. Seriously, how retarded are you to not comprehend this concept that people have different tastes than you? Is it autism?

Brie is reddit tier. /r/AlisonBrie is the second largest celeb subreddit behind /r/EmmaWatson

Think about it, there are enough A-listcelebs like Taylor Swift, Emma Stone, Jennifer Lawrence, Katy Perry or whatever to go around but it's clear that Reddit has already appropriated Brie

>hot

You're not very articulate at explaining things are you user?

>Pete
>dweeb

t. draper brainlet

What the fuck do you want then, autist? An essay on how attractive people think she is?

>giving a shit about what a website you don't like thinks
>not liking something because too many people like it
I'm glad I'll never be an unhappy contrarian like this user.

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Is it just me or would it be amazing to cum on her tits?

Brie unites Reddit and Sup Forums

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Brie is pure, don't slander her OP

Post pics.

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>mfw not even an ugly adult female ever tried to molest me as a kid
>mfw now it's too late to be molested as a kid by an adult female

Arm pits

fridge shaped body and pancake ass

Shame she's looking gaunt these days. I know she had to lose weight for GLOW, but she's lost HER glow!