Things people forget about comics

Blue Beetle can kill superman

There is a character named Doctor Bong

Mania possesses a hell mark because the writers for Venom have no idea whats going on.

Superman isn't weak against magic.

would you bang a symbiote pussy?

Starman is top 5 cape comics in history

heh

as long as it was consensual. I dont wanna risk it growing teeth down there.

There has never been someone more wrong in comic history.

Hulk has children

I once knew a guy who called himself Doctor Bong.
Let's just say his PHD wasn't accredited.

Okay, I'm curious; how exactly?

Anyone who can punch a man face clean off is superpowered in my boom

Anyone could kill Superman if they had the physical strength to rip him apart or had kryptonite

Damn right. It has the perfect balance between traditional cape stuff and trying new things.

Shame Robinson keeps getting screwed by DC.

He can generate any kind of radiation, and the beetle once created a gun that shot waves of kryptonite. Beetle created it in response to meeting supergirl, demonstrating that it has a knowledge of kryptonians and their weaknesses.

But those arent really easy to achieve. Metallo and doomsday are really the only ones that people think of as being able to inherently beat superman.

Aren't Blue Beetle's like alien super soldiers?

The Reach Scarab is an advanced alien supercomputer that analyzes different opponents and situations to reconfigure his armor and weapons to defeat them

So basically his armor can create kryptonite lasers

Reminds me. kinda unrelated but...

>Premier night of Cap 2 winter solider
>With GF at the time
>Dude in front of us is ultra chad with 3 chicks
>Keeps talking about how much he knows about marvel.
>Keeps making up bullshit, including getting death and Hela mixed up, or maybe thought they were the same person.
>Getting kinda steamed, but hopefully he shuts up during movie.
>Dead wrong
>Does mostly inaccurate summations of EVERY SINGLE CHARACTER that pops up.
>I get over it, cuddle GF, try to not to drop spaghetti
>Get to pretty bad ass reveal of Winter Solider, the title character, in that awesome scene where he fucks up Nick Fury
>Chad calls out, "And thats Cable!"
>I lose it
>I laugh audibly and cant even be mad anymore.
>Still giggle about it to this day.

How do you fuck that up, man?

I dont really get the difference between weakness and lack of resistance when you have super endurance as one of your powers. Explain it too me?

>people think of
That's the key here.
There are tonnes of characters either DC or other publishers who are way above Superman's level and they could all steamroll him into submission.

I agree whole heartily, but when compiling those lists, how often do you think even Sup Forumsmandos think about a Mexican twink in an alien powersuit?

If he was weak to magic, it would fuck him up like kyptonite does and so he wouldn't be able to operate near anyone that uses it. Just having a lack of resistance to it means he can operate with people like Zatanna just fine.

He's not especially weak to it, but he's vulnerable to it just as much as any other nonmagic regular joe.

It's a matter of semantics. If you're playing a game and an enemy is immune to fire, acid, physical, and electric attacks, but they take normal damage from cold, then saying they're weak/vulnerable to cold makes a lot more sense to say and is easier to articulate than "oh he's not weak to cold cold just affects him the wat it affects everybody else he just has no special protections unlike everything else he's immune to"

Related comfy storytime

>go to cinema with my grandpa
>used to listen to "the Lone Ranger" on the radio and such things
>go watch The Winter Soldier
>briefly summarizing who the characters are before entering the cinema
>he remembers some stuff from when we saw the First Avenger
>movie starts
>up to the face reveal of the Winter Soldier
>Silent moment, Bucky and Cap stare at each other
>out of fucking nowhere my old man yells "THAT'S THE WINTER SOLDIER, RIGHT?"
>I whisper "Ye-yeah"

I love you grampa

But could he kill batman?

>next day
>I'm still a permavirgin

Mxy and Bat-myte once disguised themselves as Bat-girl and Supergirl just to fuck with Batman and Superman by cucking them out of their abilties/reputation and wanted to pretend it was the girls suddenly becoming godly capable and wanting to be the popular ones.

Most of the league can easily kill Batman in a fight.

Batman's only a threat if he gets away and puts his autism to use to construct some turbo plan to utterly fuck you.

The problem is that some people, including writers, dont get that.

Regarding kryptonite, most people seem to exagerate how much it affects him.

Those two are so underused

lol, married now actually.

Yeah, to an anime girl pillow.

>Regarding kryptonite, most people seem to exagerate how much it affects him.

It really depends. Most writers agree getting stabbed or shot with it turns him off, but how weak he is when its just around him varies greatly.

There's kind of a limit of what you can do with them considering there's only two beings capable of beating them (in one time circumstances) when they aren't just fucking around and setting up a win condition for them to go back home. That or pissing Batman off enough to depress him into going back in Bat-myte's case.

That's what DC gets for making such absudly powered characters.

>be with 18yo friends at an arcade
>see marvel vs capcom and start playing
>non reader friends start discussing captain america and superman, one claims he saw a comic with both
>the other claims thats not possible
>they keep arguing(while I was playing but payinf attention)
>they bet money, the one that said that didnt happen was completely sure of it
>lose the game and tell them it happened twice
>fuckface.jpg

I also found it charming when they told other friends later about it and said I know a lot about comics.

ITT neckbeard fanfics

Doesn't this really depend on the reaction of Beetle vs Supes

Like how fast can Supes go anyway
He's no Flash but Supes is still fucking fast like shit son. Even if Beetle managed to get the ray off Supes momentum flying at beetle should rip him apart

Hal Jordan has a cousin named Hal Jordan who is also a superhero.

Agreed.
It's actually very formulaic.
Jack gets a problem he can't solve, gets knocked out, and an older hero teams up with him.
But the atmosphere and the world building are so amazing, that it is easily in my top 5 comics.

nah, i think in a fight, supes would win. But beetle actually has a killshot. Thats all I meant.

That's probably the best and easiest explanation to give to someone about this
Good on ya user senpai

I think you are right, but I would still call that a weakness because he lists endurance among his powers. Its like if a sword of pure silver could ignore juggernaut's invul. That would be a weakness, why not this?

Massive dip when Tony Harris leaves and Jack goes to space sadly

Drops from 10/10 to an 8/10 but then comes back strong for the finale so I'll go 9.5/10 overall.

>Things people forget about comics

Blue Beetle is Ted Kord. (Or Dan).

Lol

Dan wasent even DC, and unlike shazam, DC hasent done much with him.

Why you gatta shit on my hermano Jamie, eh?

They make a point though that when depowered he can fuck up anyone but ww

For the most part though people just wave chunks of raw kryptonite at him, so maybe some pieces are just more pure than others, every piece of uranium ore would not be equally active.

Blue Beetle has (or at least had, before Flashpoint) weapons that had "theological implications".

Reach technology is some serious shit.

You don't give a shit about Dan, don't pretend

Scarabs are the ultimate superweapon. They're designed to wipe out whole planets.

The Reach fought the GLC to a standstill and the Guardians were forced to declare a truce with them

I miss the Reach

I miss Blue Beetle. are his post rebirth things any good? I read nu52 and hated it

thats kinda cool

>Things people forget about comics
>Blue Beetle can kill superman
>literally anyone in a comic can do anything because it's all fiction

Wow, you're so knowledgeable, OP. Please, tell us more from your vast knowledge of comicbook library.

I would also like to know the answer to this.

Everyone knows Dr Bong, he's Deadpool's psychiatrist.

You're forgetting Superman moves at FTL speeds. That narrows the list way down.

It's good, but way too slow

>He doesn't like all three

It has a 'remove god from the area' weapon. Jaime just didnt want anything to do with the higher scarab functions. It can also replicate magic

Actually all humans have native magic resistance in the DC universe. Space aliens don't usually encounter up but when they do (See sinestro during all of injustice) it fucks them up HARD.
He's going off of an explanation Byrne did when he wasn't even writing Superman anymore during the same month that he explicitly got taken down by a sneak attack from Captain Marvel's lightning explocitly because in Cpatain Marvel's own words "Superman is weak to magic."
There was even an instance where a Z-list villain managed to take out Superman because the playing cards he throws are magical in nature.

>Killing Superman
>Accomplishment
Only if in rough strength. There is myriad of ways to kill him.

Yet they always lose to Green Lanterns.

Green lantern can copy the same energy as kryptonite

Yellow lantern can actually power superman

So yellow lantern superman would be ultra powerful?

>see Injustice

Weakness does extra damage lack of resistance just means it works like it's supposed too

It's retconning out the Reach and alien stuff and making the Scarab mystical in origin again

>He can generate any kind of radiation

That's Captain Atom's shit, fucking ripoff.

>all humans have native magic resistance in the DC universe

IF this were actually true, then series like Justice League Dark or Seven Soldiers have really gotten the canon wrong.

Hawkeye (Clint Barton) is an official member of the Justice League.

Yes.

Essentially:

kryptonite is SUPER EFFCTIVE vs Superman
punch is NOT VERY EFFECTIVE vs Superman
magic damages Superman

It's a really old explanation but basically the only way that people claiming Superman is not weak to magic remotely works.
Now while humans have native resistance they still adjusted the power of the spells so that they'd harm humans which is why it fucks everything that isn't Earth native to hell and back.
Eg A fireball is thought to do 20 damage by people on Earth but in reality it's doing 100 - 80 damage because as far as everyone is concerned it's just a 20 damage fireball.

They wouldn't be wrong to think that a fireball does 20 damage but at the same time that's not actually what's happening.

Busiek explained it once as something like:
Being magical is not inherently enough to hurt Superman. The magical effect has to specifically get around his endurance in some way. Let's say you enchant a knife to be able to cut through steel. It still wouldn't hurt Superman, because he's a hundred times more durable then steel. If you enchant the knife to cut through ANYTHING, then yeah, it hurts Superman, because he comes under "anything". Being magic isn't enough; you have to be magic in such a way that bypasses his near-invulnerability. If you cast a spell to turn him into a frog? Yeah, he gets turned into a frog

Taskmaster can do moves at superspeed if he watches the tape on fast-forward

The Falcon hates affirmative action

I'm not sure I would call it native magic resistance. The fact that DC uses all sorts of different rules about magic in their universe doesn't help, but if you assume that Zatanna or Constantine can cast a spell to pause everyone in a room (as was shown in JLD for example) then you assume humans have no actual resistance, native or otherwise, not that the same spell would pause/stop Superman for longer, or (what?) make him MORE still? More PAUSED?

I'm understanding your point better now, it's the War of the World's thing or the simple, travel to another country and don't drink the water thing - it doesn't make the natives sick because they drink it every day but it might make YOU sick.

However, magic use isn't really shown that way.

>kryptonite is SUPER EFFCTIVE

Again, as others have pointed out, this depends on the writer. Some have had Superman in the same room and he can still move, others, not so much (also it depends on the Kryptonite - for example, in Superman Beyond, Luthor had it in a floaty Professor X type chair that had Kryptonite in it, so Clark couldn't attack him but he could still exercise his powers in the room). In Doomed as well as in a Superman/Batman storyline, the air was seeded with Kryptonite in power form and that prevented him from entering the air, but didn't actually kill him UNLESS he was trying to penetrate/cross the atmosphere. The Kryptonite ring is an example, in some cases, they have Bats or Luthor waving it at him and it's enough to get him on the ground, in other stories, writers have it as more of a shield type thing. It's VERY inconsistent in live action and animation in particular which more people are familiar with, so that's what most people go by. Kryptonite on a chain was enough to get Donnerverse to 'drown' but he didn't 'die' and recovered 100% once it was removed. Routh Superman (in what is supposed to be the same universe) couldn't fight back with it in the ground and was put into a coma.

The pausing thing seems like it's a binary effect which is why you don't really make him more paused. Or more froggy if somebody used a frog spell? Now if you did the same thing with magic that can deal damage you'd see an increase in the damage done.
That was Byrne, while he wasn't even a writer at DC, during the same month that Superman got knocked the fuck out explicitly because of an attack being magic instead of a magical knocked dafuq out spell.

It was Busiek.

See, this is the way it's SUPPOSED to work.
but INSTEAD we have years upon years of other writers interpreting it as "if it's magical in nature , it can bypass Superman's invulnerability whether or not it's been enchanted to do so".
And so you end up with stuff like demons and beings who gain their strength from magic doing deadly damage to Superman just by slugging it out simply because of their mystical nature, and not because of some specific enchantment that can bypass his invulnerability.

this

People technically just take Ragman's word for it that the SOULS OF HIS VICTIMS THAT HE USES eventually get to go to salvation when they're used enough that their good karma outweighs their bad.

>Things people forget about comics
A writer will 99% of the time give his main character a huge boost in power level, something that most likely puts him at the very top of the universe' power level but also something that will never make it outside of that character's solo.

Isn't Ragman Jewish?

I thought there was no afterlife in Judaism?

My man!

>He's fast

if you're good you get written into the book of life and when the messiah comes whoever's name is in the book gets to live in the promised land

or something

There's no Hell in judaism. That's just a pagan tradition coopted by modern Christianity.
Basically the afterlife is you either hanging out with God or not hanging out with God and the argument is that being alone for the rest of eternity sucks.
Or TLDR Heaven is the best party ever and not getting in sucks.

Dr Doom has a cousin who's also named Dr Doom
His first name is Bob and he's a dentist themed supervillain

So Ragman's rags are a ticket to Heaven?

i dont think you're alone for all eternity, i think you just stop existing

If by heaven you mean a patch of cloth on a jew's butt, then sure

Electro's dogshit new costume during early 2000s Spider-Man

Is JLA/Avengers even canon?

ITT Blue Beetle can beat Zeus.

The events of JLA/Avengers have been referenced a few times, except of course without mentioning the crossover parts.

Every once in a while they like to make a cute reference to crossovers