You lied to me Sup Forums, you said nobody cares if you go to the theaters by yourself.
>watched camrip of jigsaw
>wanted to see it on the big screen so summed up the courage to go by myself
>is moderately busy
>get a seat close to the end of a row
>there's a couple sitting behind me to my right
>hear them snickering and whispering as the trailers start to play
>the faggot leans over and says "aren't you a bit young to be watching a movie like this?"
>his girl is laughing
>i turn to him, smile and say "logan is the killer, the barn scenes are in the past"
>i turn back towards the screen and he smacks the back of my head
>i try to ignore it, try to focus on the trailers, ten seconds later he strikes my head again
>trying to hold back the tears i turn to him again and try to stutter out "everyone in the barn dies" but mid-sentence he smacks me across my face
>as the tears start flowing i get up and power walk out of the theater, hearing his girl laughing as i leave the room
You lied to me Sup Forums, you said nobody cares if you go to the theaters by yourself
>i turn to him, smile and say "logan is the killer, the barn scenes are in the past"
KEK
The instant someone touched you like that is grounds to start a fight
you should have followed this guide
Why is reddit LARPing so boring?
There are seriously guys who need this guide and, even more impressive, faggots who bothers you if you go to the cinema alone? I must be a lucky guy.
Just drink a pint beforehand you fucking vaginas holy shit
That guy sounds like a dick desu, you did the right thing spoiling it for him. Next time just move after spoiling it.
Things that never happened.
KYS
I'm pretty sure it's satire, and you guys are dumb. You probably frequent Sup Forums because you're dumb and gullible.
You did well, user. Next time wait him outside and stab him and rape his gf.
And you're probably a newfriendo.
>tfw 90% of the movies I saw in cinema I saw alone
>nobody ever gives a shit, litearlly never had any problems
>the only people who "make fun of me" or joke about it are my friends who I mentioned it to with confidence
Glad to live in a non retarded place
>go to see jigsaw at the theatre with my girl
>she wanted to see a camrip, but I don't watch that low resolution faggot shit
>go in, pretty busy...looking good, lots of people to watch me get jerked off by my girlfriend
>this ugly faggot comes up and sits in front of us
>she takes her hand off my cock, says he's creeping her out
>fucking cockblocked, bro!
>lean over and assert my dominance with a sick burn
>he turns his head and mumbles something, couldn't even hear what he said
>decide to give him a smack
>keep smacking him every few minutes
>my gf stacy is laughing, she thinks it's hilarious
>turns back again, starts to mumble something again, so I give him a good smack on the face
>he starts crying like a little girl, and shuffles out of the theater
>"you're so bad, Chad!" says stacy as she puts my hand back on my cock (which was erect this whole time btw)
>everyone stops watching the movie to watch until I finish
>blow a huge load
>everyone starts applauding
>accidentally get some jizz in the popcorn bucket of the girl behind me
>she says thanks!!! before munching away
>can't remember what the movie was about, but that's cool, I'll just watch it on netflix in a few months
>Logan is the killer and the barn scenes are in the past
Based
>beta blockers
KEK
I've been going to the cinema alone since I was 14 and have never been bothered by anyone. Are all of you going to cinemas in the ghetto?
top lol
How DARE YOU speak to ME like that you fucking gurgle spit of a semen stained cumrag wringed vaginal SOUP baby. I TELL YOU when YOU talk to ME you fucking INGRATE SHIT CUNT. You wanna come in here, in MY FUCKING THREAD, and you DARE to have the bitch NERVE to tell ME how to RUN my GOD DAMN THREAD?
LISTEN FUCKER. You think your faggoty boy bod can compete with my masculine man meat of MINCED MOLESTATION? YOU GAY AND ALSO HOMOSEXUAL QUEER BOY? I'll bend you over and give you all 4.7 inches of my raw fucking singles power, give you what you CRAVE, give you what you DESERVE, what you THRIVE ON. I'll penetrate you with such raw fury and blast your ass so hard and work up such a sweat our fluids will be red white and blue, the most PATRIOTIC ASS POUNDING since your MOM sucked CLINTONS COCK and your DAD sucked CLINTONS CLUTCH. Do you UNDERSTAND the WORDS i am TYPING you slutty fifer? Your eyes are getting fucked by slam poetry in the sixth sense. I'll ride your (you) and fuck you till you jew, I dont care if this board is blue, you anonycuck.
DO YOU HEAR ME?
I'LL EAT YOUR ASS WITH FURY AND VENGEANCE.
I eat newfags and shit redditors, son, I'll smack your ass and call you a fag and you'll LIKE IT so much you'll SUCK MY FUCKIN VEINY THROBBING MEMBER you shark tossing cock. You fucker.You god damn cocktrucker. You fucking little prickly taint gobbling hog smacker sister basher fist crasher ALABASTER NIGGER.
Suck my fucking reply count. Here's my (you), now fuck off and die forever in your daddy's shit stick closet.
Trying to hard man
why didint you just kick his ass ? and buttfuck him with his gfs severed head ? some people...
>she puts my hand back on my cock
So close user.
>sit next to a stranger and ask for time to blend in
So THAT'S why there's always a faggot buying a ticket next to an already occupied seat in a half empty theater.
This.
In the city, I was accosted just because I was out on the street alone.
>Whats up man, you dont have any friends?
>wheres your family?
>do you go to school??? lmao
>really want to see blade runner but no friends
>the ultimate dilemma
>fuck it i'll go, cause i'm actually making a statement that i do not give a single shit
>at the ticket counter "5:30 blade runner"
>"will that be 1 ticket sir?"
>it's clear to me that my pockets are not big enough for the amount of spaghetti i'm carrying
>run out of there
Never AGAIN!!!
lmao that nigga was classy
Get fucked you fucking beta, the cinema is for CHAD's like me.
...
>cinema starts letting people purchase tickets online
>figure that I can finally start watching movies at the cinema because I won't have to embarrassingly ask for a single ticket
>buy the ticket and head to the cinema
>see that there's a qt girl who checks your tickets before you can enter the room
>turn 360 degrees and walk away
I'll just stick to YIFY rips.
>Not putting your arms behind your head slouching back and laughing the whole way through the film after you spoilt the film for the pleb trying to act hard.
I have been to the cinema alone more times than I can count and have never ever felt awkward about it. I only take my girlfriend when there is a suitable movie for her (Beauty and the Beast, Inside Out etc) otherwise I go alone because I enjoy it more.
why dont you just buy two?
>Go to the cinema alone
>muster up the courage to ask the girl at the ticket booth on a date
>Ask ticket girl if she would like to go on a date to see the movie with me
>I said it quietly so she asked me to repeat myself
>face is turning red as fuck
>ask her again, she does a face that I can only describe as looking visibly confused
>a couple of seconds go by and she nor I have said anything yet
>she ends up saying "Uhhh..no thanks sorry, hope you enjoy the movie though!" with a forced smile awkwardly stretched across her face
>almost start tearing up because the situation is so soul shattering to me
>start briskly walking to my movie
>movie ends, go back and see she isn't there anymore
Sorry bros, I fucked up.
you were lucky that she wasn't there. can you imagine walking past her with that awkward eye contact?
>Go to the cinema alone
>"Jigsaw 9PM please"
>"one ticket?"
>panic
>"n-no, of course, give me...give me 10! I'm waiting for my friends, I have a lot of friends! H-hehe"
>wait outside for a while
>1 min before film starts, go inside so no one can bother me
>get to the girl checking the tickets
>realize they chenged shifts, she was the same girl who sold me the tickets
>"oh, hi user, where are your friends?"
>run away
>spent $100 and now I'm downloading the camrip from my bedroom
Cinema is gay.
Lol
I want to laugh at you but I've had the same thing happen to me as a teen
>see inspirational quote
>extreme courage comes over me
>go to cinema alone cause very courageous
>alpha me:"6:45 jigsaw plz"
>qt ticket woman: "1 ticket for jigsaw 6:45"
>have an impulse to make sure that the qt woman doesn't get the wrong idea of me
>"i have friends, but i like to visit kinoplex alone"
>"okay"
>realize that this piece of information might counter-intuitively make me seem like a bigger loser
>couldn't enjoy the movie cause i replayed that situation in my head the whole time
Honestly, guys don't try to prove anything to yourself.
>go to cinema alone
>qt ticket girl
>"6:45 pirates of the caribbean please"
>"JAG SBARRO?"
>"JAGSBAROOOOOOOOOOO"
This meme is going TOO FAR