Don't kid yourselves, this would be you in that situation

Don't kid yourselves, this would be you in that situation.

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no, it would be you

I died on the beach

Knowing my luck I was probably the guy at the front of the boat on D-Day.

I died in the trenches.

this desu senpai

>PARKER GET OUT!!

Did Parker get out, bros?

yes, but I'd live

plot twist, the old guy at the beginning and end of the movie is actually Upham

>A coward dies a thousand times before his death, but the valiant taste of death but once. It seems to me most strange that men should fear, seeing that death, a necessary end, will come when it will come.

let's ask his opinion again on March 16th

the scene is literally an allegory for the holocaust, spielberg even said so.

>uppham is the west
>German is Germany
>the jew getting stabbed, begging for his life are the jews
>uppham can hear the jew screaming and begging for help
>uppham does nothing

I would probably drown on a sinking ship in the channel

Romans took death like champions. Except Nero, he was a little wimp. Seneca didn't give a fuck when it was his time.

You still remember his name 2000+ years later.

>AAAAAAAAAA HELP ME POSCA

>that moment when 10 ss soldiers surrender to upham

mostly cuz he got stabbed

and the casino in vegas

Implying i would not gather as much military intelligence i could and immediately defect to the forces of good (also known as the axis powers)

Damn.

yeah, didn't he let them all go though?

I would be helping the German.

>have a friend who thinks he is a badass
>always talking about army and covert ops
>pot belly and skinny arms
>terrified of doing anything that would get him in trouble
>thinks he would be great as a hitman because of his "cold and calculated nature"

The guy is really into Ray Donovan character and talks about solving other people's problems,often suggesting violence even though he was never in the fight. He also thinks character in OP's pic was a fucking pussy and he would slice that german's throat.

yea, "fag" lel

I'd be on the bridge crying.

>Judea declares war on Germany
>"Halp, they're killing us Jews!"

I failed medical

Projecting. Just because you're a weak coward doesn't mean everyone else here is. I've already served in the military.

>so afraid of torture and/or execution that they commit a mortal sin and kill themselves
>try to hide their crimes endlessly, resorting to assassinating witnesses and intimidating people and then begging for exile instead of facing the executioner like a man
>treated fallen warriors with zero respect, paraded them in front of population like spoils
>executed the leaders of rebel states mercilessly, never showing quarter to defeated royal families
>roman soldiers were bloodthirsty, rapists
>roman military was only loyal to itself, treated the people like cattle and the emperor like a pet
nope nope nope wrong

Nop I saw the movie, I'd definitely shoot rather than get the knife.

I died in basic.

>not crouching behind cover until your health regenerates

>chr*stcucks

Thank you for your service

I failed basic and was put on a desk job. Later i drove trucks for the navy.

>terrified of doing anything that would get him in trouble
Sounds like a perfect candidate for the army. They enforce unquestionable obedience through brainwashing.

I was on a screen destroyer in the pacific and got blown up by a jap sub without even seeing it.

nice try faggot the navy drives ships

s-someone has to deliver the food to the boats at the docks

>""""a friend""""

naaah almost everyone ITT would kill, over 95% of us. that's human nature.

That friend is me and I will find you user.

implying americans cried liked that wimp
they just didnt give a fuck and were laughing their ass off
who cares about a pest control

that's stupid
the west wasn't too scared to help, we just didn't care when hitler was killing only jews

lmao what a fag

no this would be me
youtube.com/watch?v=oodTuhaLYpU

Im pretty tall so a easy target for the machine guns at omaha beach. Probably would be the first to get popped.

sup private pyle

Pretty much every soldier had a breakdown the first time they went into combat. Weeks into the battle for Normandy fresh American divisions were still landing. And it pissed Patton off to no end about how completely useless entire divisions could be if it was their first time in combat.

Yeah, me too. I always pictured myself at the guy who gets headshot the second the boats (or whatever they're called) open up

No we got POEMS about Romans taking death like champions. They didn't write about the soldiers that shat themselves to death during the battle.

Parker got wasted.

I died on the way to the ship.

i met captain america at my school once, they took us to an auditorium and he was performing alongside two actresses. They did a short show and that was about it. On the way back to class i ran into him and I asked him if he was on malcolm in the middle and he said yeah with a big smile. I have no idea what he was doing there.

>avoids getting into unnecessry trouble
>is cold and calculated
>suggests violence when needed, but considers it the last option
>eager to solve peoples problems

your friend seems like he could do it, on the other side an idiot that posts his own jackass clips on youtube and gets into random fights with strangers is someone that certainly couldn't.

Lucky asshole,

I didnt even touch sand. Mowed over as soon as the door dropped.

I would've jumped out too early and drowned

>And it pissed Patton
I would piss on Patton, only combat the fat fuck has ever seen first hand was chasing spicks with Pancho Villa.

Adam Goldberg invited me onto a new podcast he's doing where he interviews antisemitism trolls because I made fun of a joke he made on Twitter.

They weren't True Romans

I died on way to enrolment

I got aborted.

he didn't even fight then, he just served as aide-de-camp and strapped the corpses on the hood of his car to parade them redneck style through texas. the guy was a massive retard

I shot Hartman

words of wisdom

>implying this wouldn't be me

Something tells me you know very little about history,

I died in Leningrad fighting the real bad guys

I got hungerover from drinking in the officers bar in headwaters.

Yeah but they'd be tears of joy.

>kike in my unit
>Rubs everyone's nose in it
>shows favouritism to his tribesmen but accuses us of doing it against him.
>polices my speech
>writes long articles in the army paper deconstructing and criticising gentile whites
>keeps arguing that my unit should be integrated with niggers
>almost got me kicked out of the army when I tried to bring it up with him reasonably.
>he then expects me to run into danger on his behalf.......

Seriously if speilberg was trying to symbolise how how goys stood by when the Germans turned on Jews to make us feel bad, then in my case he failed miserably.

I would be at home, hiding in my moms basement and watching Star Wars.

I always remember the guy whose helmet stops a bullet, he takes it off to look at it, and then immediately gets shot in the head. Just one thoughtless action and it's lights out.

Even if you die bravely, you're still going to shit/piss yourself.

I'm the guy stabbing the kike

>not falling off the boat and getting dragged to the bottom of the ocean by the weight of all your gear

I'm that guy who haphazardly handles ghetto rigged sock bombs and smacked it into a tank blowing myself up.

I don't even know how to swim. I'd be completely fucked.

>the holocaust happened

You have to be over 18 to post here

I was the guy who held the sticky grenade for too long.

You mean 15th?

lol no. pic related is me. you are down there somewhere OP

In interviews with veterans of The Great War Part Deux: Sudeten Boogaloo, there are three stages you go through.

1.) Fresh off the boat and terrified of battle and all the death.
2.) Confidence in the training and experience you possess and thinking you're nearly invincible.
3.) Realizing all the training and experience isn't going to save you from shit like a mortar hitting your position while sleeping and making you terrified of battle once again.

youtube.com/watch?v=cz9j4qf-g7U&t=761s

this video sums up alot of the problems with upham as a character.

I didn't get drafted

checkmate jews

I'd probably look like a shit soldier when surrounded by Rangers and Paratroopers if I hadn't fired a weapon since basic training. I don't know if I'd cry and watch my countrymen get stabbed though.

I was 4-F by the draft board for severe autism

you mean you would be a czech wehrmacht soldier cucked into fighting for the nazis?
sounds about right

>cucked
yea sure. in the end everybody was in the resistance and totally against it

upham was the soyest of boys

You forget Patton fought at Carthage against the Romans.

>everybody supported it the Nazis had 200% haven't you seen the pictures on Sup Forums of the Russian ladies giving milk to the waffen SS faggots????
>NAzis number 1, eveyrone hadted the jooooooooooze
lolololol

Deepest lore

ww2 sucked hard

overshot. but only by a little small margin. very tiny

>not just shooting down the barrel of the tank cannon and detonating the shell inside the tank

they don't sleep on the beach anymore

I'm actually an Army medic so I'd be long dead at this point

I have pretty bad ADHD I doubt they'd even take me.

>tfw german and would have to face you guys in battle

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