SILENCE

SILENCE

I KILL YOU

You guys think he magicked himself into the Slytherin dorms at night and spit in everybody's mouth

?

"Keep your forked tongue behind your teeth"

HARRY DID YOU FUCK WITH THE GOBLET OF FIRE?!?!?!!

who put this cock smoker in charge

they definitely got some Dumbledrops

Let's start with you old man.

THIS IS MY FINAL FIT MY FINAL BELLYACHE

Yes yes well done silence well done silence
HOWEVER

"spit"

No Slytherins, no Housecups.

Yes yes well done goblet of fire well done HOWEVER

ALAS EARWAX

>learn spell to identify things
>buy a bunch of Every Flavor Beans
>spend time eating only the beans you like
>collect up all the foulest ones and give them to first years

*soft sound of die being cast*

SILENCE is what you should blissfully be sitting in after turning off the dullest franchise in the history of movie franchises. Seriously each episode following the boy wizard and his pals from Hogwarts Academy as they fight assorted villains has been indistinguishable from the others. Aside from the gloomy imagery, the series’ only consistency has been its lack of excitement and ineffective use of special effects, all to make magic unmagical, to make action seem inert.

Perhaps the die was cast when Rowling vetoed the idea of Spielberg directing the series; she made sure the series would never be mistaken for a work of art that meant anything to anybody?just ridiculously profitable cross-promotion for her books. The Harry Potter series might be anti-Christian (or not), but it’s certainly the anti-James Bond series in its refusal of wonder, beauty and excitement. No one wants to face that fact. Now, thankfully, they no longer have to.

>a-at least the books were good though

"Bane?" The writing is dreadful; the book was terrible. As I read, I noticed that every time a character went for a walk, the author wrote instead that the character "stretched his legs."

I began marking on the back of an envelope every time that phrase was repeated. I stopped only after I had marked the envelope several dozen times. I was incredulous. Rowling's mind is so governed by cliches and dead metaphors that she has no other style of writing. Later I read a lavish, loving review of Harry Potter by the same Stephen King. He wrote something to the effect of, "If these kids are reading Harry Potter at 11 or 12, then when they get older they will go on to read Stephen King." And he was quite right. He was not being ironic. When you read "Harry Potter" you are, in fact, trained to read Stephen King.

Where the FUCK is atlas shrugged?

He said calmly

ONE TRILLION POINTS to Gryffindor for conceding defeat so gracefully in this year's Quidditch cup. I believe a change in decorations is in order.

below shit shit tier

t. pleb

t. 15 year old

t.Scroto licker

make me

>HARRY YOU FUCKING CUNT, DID YOU PUT YOUR CUNTING NAME IN THE MOTHER FUCKING GOBLET?

Did based Draco fuck her?

I saw Albus Dumbledore at a grocery store in London yesterday. I told him how cool it was to meet him in person, but I didn’t want to be a douche and bother him and ask him for photos or anything.

He said, “Oh, like you’re doing now?”

I was taken aback, and all I could say was “Huh?” but he kept cutting me off and going “huh? huh? huh?” and closing his hand shut in front of my face. I walked away and continued with my shopping, and I heard him chuckle as I walked off. When I came to pay for my stuff up front I saw him trying to walk out the doors with like fifteen Lemon Drops in his hands without paying.

The girl at the counter was very nice about it and professional, and was like “Sir, you need to pay for those first.” At first he kept pretending to be tired and not hear her, but eventually turned back around and brought them to the counter.

When she took one of the Lemon Drops and started scanning it multiple times, he stopped her and told her to scan them each individually “to prevent any magical infetterence,” and then turned around and winked at me. I don’t even think that’s a word. After she scanned each Lemon Drop and put them in a bag and started to say the price, he kept interrupting her by yawning really loudly.

she was probably molested by Snape

HARRY DID YOU PUT YOUR NAME IN THE HARRY POTTER AND THE GOBLET OF FIRE?

wow, how did they get away with this?

>tried to read brothers karamazov
>too pleb for russian articulation

>Brave New World below 1984
pleb