/doag/ - Dat Outrageous, Awful Garbage

The Dumbing of Age Thread: Creative Thread Titles Edition.

Today, Walky considers bestiality.
Tomorrow, Billie performs it.

Thoughts? Comments?

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Brrrraaaapppp-kino

>tiny Asian woman plays with her sex muppet.png

this is a garbage, throw it out

fart fags plz go

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YAAAS!

When it comes to love triangles, I generally advocate Option C.

It's unfair how cute Joyce is and how she's stuck in this comic.

Are you ready for this, /doag/?

DUN DUN DUNNNNNNNNNNN

no, put it back

>we didn't get to watch them make out.
The only thing that could've salvaged this plotline...Then again maybe I shouldn't expect that it wouldn't look like ass.

Is Ruth having an orgasm in the last panel?

the only way that makes sense for this to go is a fakeout, he wouldnt ACTUALLY redo ambers storyline exactly (annoying little brother included), would he

Oh ye of too much faith

>GAME OF THRONES!

That's the catchphrase you're going with, Howie? Is that your Thing?

This whomps.

That's what I'm hoping for as well. I'd love it if Ruth was only assuming her grandfather was some strict-ass army general type of being, when in reality he wasn't anywhere near that. Sort of like how you'd assume Mike's parents to be Satan worshippers, or at the very least neglectful.

It dawns on me now that Willis seems to only be able to write parents as either caricatures or as pure evil.

He's going to have Howie hit on Dina then Grandpa Lessick is going to kidnap Billie?

And the situation is diffused within a week with her grandfather turning out to be not such a bad guy after all.

Because Willis loves to set up potential conflicts then fizzles out with them in the most unsatisfactory manner possible

I mean look at her brother. Would he be so chipper if the grandfather was in a horrible mood?

If Willis expects us to feel frightened or disgusted with Ruth's grandfather, he's done an (expectedly) awful job at it.

Getting to know Ruth is more likely to inspire sympathy with the guy for putting up with her. Billie claims he's "unsafe" but she's a petty drunken stockholmed bitch herself so what good's her word? And Howie is awfully chipper for a kid living with someone who's supposedly nigh-abusive. Also

>Game of Thrones

Stop trying to write different "varieties" of nerd, Willis. GoT is for plebs anyway.

Is her grandpa like 8 feet tall?

No, why would she be? She isn't having sex. That's more of an "Oh shit, grandad is here." look. The context ought to be extremely obvious.

Do you even think before asking such inane questions?

Well it's Willis, so she's either having an orgasm or an aneurism.

Ruth's grandfather being an ok guy would be the obvious "twist", but Willis will always write a simple character when he could write a complex one, especially with his protagonists. I predict his first appearance will include some sort of anti-gay comment.

Mike's parents are cliche overbearingly nice people, which is just as expected.

In abusive or otherwise maladaptive family situations you frequently see someone take a role designed to reduce or defuse tension, if not outright try to cover up abuse, with the facade of happiness. I seriously doubt Willis would put that much effort into it and it really wouldn't really fit in this case as Howie has presumably been living alone with his grandfather for at least a year.

Or as pure evil caricatures. Amber's dad literally stood dramatically lit and had evil poses. I think he even laughed maniacally.

I'll never forget what a shitbag Willis was during the Keenspot/Sexy Losers thing.

>I predict his first appearance will include some sort of anti-gay comment.

>So you're the dyke corrupting my granddaughter?
>Well, at least she's got great taste in titties; you're alright by me, kid.

What happened?

>Ruth, you're so fucked up that you can't even fornicate with the right gender? Send that girlie over here while I pop this viagra and I'll set her straight!

This is a bit late, but let's back up a bit.

It's potentially normal that she doesn't want to see her adult-figure (especially with this comic's stance on adults), there's nothing wrong with being optimistic, and sure if you're suicidal you get therapy and drugs. But how the fuck was she deemed suicidal in the first place? She was laying in bed for an overly long time and everyone just assumed she wanted to kill herself. It might be depression, but it's hardly a suicide attempt. What would the process of firing even look like without some sort of definitive action or rule-breaking on Ruth's part?

Yeah, and Becky's dad was a gun toting Lifetime movie villain. Willis is about as subtle as a bagful of hammers

I don't get why he would just say "Game of Thrones". I mean it's not like he's saying it in reference to what Ruth is saying.

I mean no one even USES "Game of Thrones" as a catchphrase. Ive heard "GYMKATA" and "ROADHOUSE" but never, ever "Came of Thrones"

There's literally NO reason for him to just pop up and say it.

Plus those eyebrows are flying off his head

the first time he showed up it was the first thing he said because he really wanted to watch it. now i guess its just a callback

Well, it's our last best chance at a Toedad-esque beautiful disaster, so I really hope Willis doesn't just kill a conflict he's been building for this long in two strips with a shitty fake-out where her Grandpa is Mr. Nice Guy

It's a pretty stupid, nonsensical callback then

Part of me wonders if Willis like...censored what was going on with Ruth because yeah. That didn't seem like being suicidal. That was more depression...at worst. For all they know Ruth was just really lazy and slept in all day.

Like everyone on the floor IMMEDIATELY assumed the worst.

Willis walks around braying "TRANSFORMERS. TRANSFORMERS."

He thinks all nerds do the same thing.

Well the big Christian confrontation between Joyce, her family and her church went nowhere.

if we had actually seen the grandpa before (and he was abusive) this would be a fine time for him to like, change his ways and try to be there in her time of need, but since itll be his first appearance that would be pretty pointless too

So...back during the webcomic gold rush, everyone on Keenspace was trying to get onto Keenspot because you'd get a cut of the profits. Sexy Losers was up to join and, for some reason, it got to be voted on by existing members of Spot. It was voted down and it seemed pretty cut and dry until cheeky ol' Ghastly posted the chat logs of the voting and it turned out Willis and Howard Taylor (the Schlock Mercenary guy) were extremely vocal opponents of him getting in, despite there being more adult comics on the network already. Taylor threatened to quit over it (then quit months later anyway), but I'll always remember Willis's line from it. It was, and I paraphrase, "I wish he knew what we were saying about him, so he could see how much we hate him."

Space Coyote famously turned down a Keenspot invite over it, but much of the fiasco has been lost to the annals of internet history. I'll always dislike Willis for what a fucker he was back then, though.

Of course he censored it. Look at the real attempted suicide with Becky's mother.

Can't risk triggering the snowflakes.

they all are

Wow. Fuck that.

That overwrought trigger warning makes me want to fucking find the cat Willis posted and make a post on the day it dies.

>>Wow. Fuck that.
Like I said, a lot of got nuked at the time. It's lost to history, though a few archives exist with snippets.

Kudos to Ghastly, wherever he is now, though. Him and Scott Kurtz were top level trolls back in the early internet days.

She did repeatedly talk about suicide with Billie though. And almost drank herself to death twice. Not that that explains anyone else's reaction.

Ive disliked WIllis since back in his usenet days. And in the early days of the Allspark.

While he wasnt quite as crazy back then, he was always a smug piece of shit with an unwarranted sense of self-importance.

People in DoA become privy to hidden information when the plot demands it, for example, Carla's Cunt Crusher.

Ghastly still lives. He posts on Fark all the fucking time, actually.

I think his Ghastly comic still updates sporadically.

Nothing but gay ass shit though

There's always Polygyny

Nothing wrong with threesomes

Now if only I could convince me gf of that...

>Nothing but gay ass shit though
That's pretty much all current webcomics.

I have a sudden need for some hourglass expansion of Dina.

Nice, but needs more erotic hat removal.

GRAND DAD

Hey, it ain't called 'gay sex with hats on' for nothing.

Someone saved my edit!

>tfw dislike evangelical protestantism
>tfw like the idea of america as a protestant nation but think protestant theology in general is literally a bunch of christians who wished they could be jews without having to actually be jewish
>tfw would convert to whatever crazy church for joyce

I wonder if this is what so many of my male ancestors felt

Be funny if her grandfather turned out to be...

>randomly jumps into the hallway and shouts GAME OF THRONES! at his sister

really bamzooples the zimbabwe

We even have a character called penny.

Just don't go the way of Alan Moore, user.

I would also accept Master Roshi as her grandfather, if we're hoping for the utterly ridiculous.

>When dumb fanart is funnier than the product its fanart-ing from.

Makes one wonder if we could convert his fans with some examples of his treatment of others.

Seriously: Do people greet their older sister with "big sis"?
I remember Roz doing so before and I found this kind of irritating...

When does Joyce get seduced by the flaky """nice guy""" and get baby trapped into a broken marriage?

They do in my Japanese animes.

I wonder if Chloe contacted Ruth's grandfather. Seems like it would be expected if he's an emergency contact.

Anyway, time to see this pseudo-parental relationship turn out to be terrible like most of the others.

what season of game of thrones are they even on in this comic at this point?

Redoing Amber's storyline is basically what happened with Toedad, with an extra spin of stupidity to it. I wouldn't be surprised in the least if this ended up being an even worse retread. You know how he doesn't like doing new things

Willis likes to do serious subplots but doesn't like writing anything particularly unpleasant for him. So, we only get a slice of what someone truly on the road to offing themselves would do, just like we don't see the emotional trauma that would occur if your father went mad and chased you through the woods with a hunting rifle (seriously, Becky should be an emotional fucking wreck right now)

Well, Taylor is about as Mormon as they come, so I'm not surprised, but why the hell did Willis hate him?

So, do you guys like this ironically, or what? 'Cause it seems to me as though you're all genuinely enjoying this trainwreck of a comic.

>tfw you will never motorboat Joyce's large mammaries after she ran for 10 miles
It hurts to live.

what the fuck gave you that impression

Awful lot of genuine shipping and the like. People actually discussing the plot and feeling bad for some characters. Fan art.

There's much worthier Sup Forums media out there that doesn't get half as much attention as this shitshow does.

>It's unfair how cute Joyce is and how she's stuck in this comic.

God damn you, user.

Now I have the idea - sadly I have neither artistic skill nor money to commission those who do - for a comic. Sup Forums anons raid DoA, literally breaking into the comic to rescue Joyce.

>background of the first page is DoA, some shitty arc. over it, a trio of black-suited, green-hued anons - one bearing a flag with nothing but the triangle of Joyce's smile rappel into view
>use bolt cutters and torches to cut open the comic's border and burst into the scene
>characters react as the anons rush them and grab Joyce "Team J reports subject acquired. Teams M and D reporting resistance. Beginning exfiltration now"
>next page is on the background of Sup Forums, a shaken Joyce looking around
> "Who-who are you?"
>"Anons from Sup Forums, ma'am. We're part of the PTS Operations team."
>"PTS?"
>"Protect That Smile. We saw what was happening in your comic and had to get you out. We've got much better comics lined up for you, with much better writers."
>"And artists," the user with the flag mutters.

people ship with characters they add actual depth to themselves

people discuss the plot because it's a goddamn trainwreck

people feel bad for characters because of the aforementioned depth they added.

willis himself is a piece of shit who refuses to put any sort of effort into his works nowadays and is completely incapable of creating three-dimensional characters. Thus, it falls to people who were once fans of this or his older works to wallow in anger together and create far better content than he ever has or would.

like Yoto and the sexy, sexy fanart.

>Inb4 it's her grandad with a shotgun and it's School Shooter 2: Electric Bogalo.

It's definitely the punches right?

She punches so hard.

>Granddad shows up
>Probably calls her a pathetic sack of shit who couldn't even kill herself
>Ruth get's depressed again

Calling it. Also she keeps her job because Willis is just gonna do a hard reset on everything that just happened with her (but she will still have Bille).

That's stupid. If we were going to raid the actual DoA comic, the first thing we'd want to do is rip off Carla's pants to see how huge her dick is. Then we'd handcuff Mary to pantless Carla to get things rolling between the two of them.

Then we'd break into Amber's room and post as much Sal/Danny and Sal/Ethan porn as we can create within twenty or thirty minutes.

>tfw you will never get punched super hard by a really strong girl. Or have a really strong girl punch other people on your behalf. Or just have her punch things just to entertain you.

Because Ghastly could tell an amusing story with adult themes. Or because Willis hadn't yet converted to the light side and still hated trans folks. I'm basing that on his hanging out with a known mormon.

A bunch of those points sounds like something we do to all works of fiction....

all together though?

It's sort of like how 90% of the Touhou fandom revolves around improving on ZUN's shitty art and Casio-tier music production. Except that, unlike us, the Touhou fandom actually likes ZUN.

Well, maybe not all together most of the time. So I guess you got me there.

Man, don't drag Taylor into this. He's too good for Willis.

Just putting forth ideas as to why Willis would dislike Ghastly. I mean, with as rabidly anti-religion as he is now, it doesn't make sense that he'd hang out with Taylor. I'm not saying anything against Taylor, he does, for one, do a good job of separating his inane beliefs from his work. (Or at least he did when I was reading his stuff back in the day).

ONEE-CHAN
GEIMU

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Because he was still in second-hand fundie mode and hadn't quite snapped yet.

For someone with a conservative as hell upbringing, Willis seems incredibly unwilling to cut people slack for not being full on liberals. I'm incredibly left and even I have to walk on eggshells to comment on his shit.

If they're under the age of 13, sure.

As much as anyone can enjoy a trainwreck.

>willis himself is a piece of shit who refuses to put any sort of effort into his works nowadays and is completely incapable of creating three-dimensional characters. Thus, it falls to people who were once fans of this or his older works to wallow in anger together and create far better content than he ever has or would.
Wallowing in anger over something dumb like this comic is actually pretty fun.

That process began with Rapin' Ryan. Let's hold that off for now.

That seems natural to me, people who have defined themselves in opposition to where they come from are not going to cut people who remind them of where they come from any slack.