They say you can't have a rainbow without rain... well I've been looking for that pot of gold my whole life Ray...

They say you can't have a rainbow without rain... well I've been looking for that pot of gold my whole life Ray, and you know what I just realised? I'm the fucking leprechaun. Caspere knew this

Is the dialogue really like that?

I wish it was that good.

nothing will ever top "it's a dog eat dog world, Ray"

They say you don't shoot a man before throwing him out of a plane...
I've asked questions about Bane my whole life Ray, and you know what I just realised? I'm the motherfucking CIA.
Dr. Pavel knew this.

and i'm the fucking chinaman

>they say it's a doggy dog world. well guess what, ray? i'm touring with the baha men.

Yes, but each line is interspaced with a long, unblinking 15 second stare.

When I was a kid my father used to tell me that nightmares weren't real. Then one day he saw a man burn to death. Well, Ray. Santa ain't real either, but I still get fucking presents for christmas

They say you can't make an omelette without breaking a few eggs. Well, Ray, all my eggs are in one basket and like Mark Twain said, I'm watching that basket though a lot of eggs are still going to get broken and I won't be the only one with egg on my face. Caspere knew this.

all I remember is Colin Farrell threatening to rape a kid's mom with his dead dad lmao

>they say there's two sides to every story. well guess what, ray? i can't read and i'm a triangle.

All I remember is "YOU FAT PUSSY"

How was s2 so comically bad compared to how amazing s1 was

he actually does say something along the lines of "if i sit down to take a shit i got a gun to my head saying MAKE IT A GOOD ONE!"

Season 1 was actually only good because of the two lead performances and the director. When those three left we saw what Nick Pizza's writing was like with nothing to distract from it.

They say a table only has four legs. Well, a dog does too, until you cut one off. You get off on that Ray? Hurting dogs? Well this one’s been at sea his whole life, but I ain’t about to rescue you or that Saint Bernard you’re carrying. It’s picanese, and ungent

My pops... Pops was a drinker. You know this. I used to wait up for him, lying awake for hours, just... just terrified that tonight might be the night, y'know... he finally doesn't make it back home. But sure enough, I'd hear him come stumbling in... four, five in the morning, sometimes past sunrise. And he'd open my door and peek in, just to see that I was safe in bed, then he'd stumble over to his bed and pass out. And boy, once he was out, he was OUT. Some mornings, seemed like not even the call of nature was loud enough to wake him. Used to piss the bed... shit the sheets, soil himself, like an infant. My pops.

Only one night he came stumbling in, guess he got confused and thought my bed was his. So I'm lyin' there, just staring at the ceiling, trapped underneath two hundred and fifty pounds of unconscious drunk. Couldn't wake him up, couldn't slip away. I felt my arm fall asleep, then my leg went. Just watching the sun rise. And then I heard it. And honey, I ain't ever believed in no God, but in that moment I was praying, please, please let it just be gas. The smell hit me a moment later, and baby, it was just as solid as you or me. I ain't ever forgotten that, I ain't ever felt as helpless as that morning... pinned down, covered in my pop's shit.

And I'm gonna tell everyone just what I told my pops: Frank Semyon won't take another man's shit, ever again. And if they wanna make a liar out of me, baby, I'm returning fire. They're gonna find out just how big a stink a Semyon can make.

It's like watching a game of cat and mouse and I'm the dog. Well this dog's gotta take a shit.

They say when you give someone an inch, he will take a mile. You know what, Ray? Life gave me kilometers and I'm the measuring tape.

They say there are no crown-wearers in heaven who were not cross-bearers here below, Ray. Well, I ain't no fucking tic tac toe board.

>mixing a shit meme with a godlike meme (vinceposting)

heh

They say blood is thicker than water, Ray. Guess what... Mine is high pressured and I only drink Hawaiian Deep Seawater. Caspere knew this.

Ray, you see a gentle hand may lead even an elephant by a hair. Me? I put the hand inside the elephant's anus.

I thought the season 2 actors did a good job other than the gay cop guy. Farrel was especially great. I think it's the script to blame more than anything else. Harroldson and mcconaughhey couldn't have elevated season 2 to the level that people would have accepted it.

Vince was pretty shit up until his final scene where he suddenly decides to give an Oscar worthy performance.

He was saddled with the most ridiculous lines in the show to his credit.

They say that watching a pot means the water will never boil, but what they don't realise Ray, is that I'm the fucking pasta.

And a plot that had absolutely nothing to do with the main plot.

vince vaughn really deserves better roles that last scene was great

>There's a little cafe someways past my place, Ray. I've driven by that place every day for the past 20 years .Then one day I decide to go inside and you now what I realize? It's a fucking hardware store.

the lines weren't that great.
all the plebs that hated season 2 are just retards with no taste, as if more than 10% even understood season 1 "philosophy".
also season 2 was more about the characters and not the story. i like it way more than 1.

Someone caption this, I'm too autistic to come up with a funny one. Thanks in advance.

>Another day another dollar, Ray. Thing is I'm working overtime here and I aint got a penny for the tip jar. You know what I'm saying?

...

Farrell is kind of underrated, probably because he's a pretty boy. He was good in Miami Vice too.

they say in for a penny in for a pound, we’ll ray i’m the baker, and they just ordered a cheesecake

>Didn't you ever go on field trips as a kid, Ray? Did your teachers ever truly teach you anything of value? It doesn't matter now Ray, because I'm Ms. Frizzle and my magic school bus is taking a trip straight up your ass.

I loved the original Vice, but I just couldn't get into the film.

Farrel is great in "In Bruges" though. I liked him a lot in " The Lobster" as well.

underrated

The say the road to a friend's house is never long, Ray. That's why I keep my enemies at the end of the driveway.

He's better playing sad sacks than cool guy characters.

perfect

They say a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush. Well guess what Ray, i am Mao fucking Zedong and there are no more birds at hand. Caspere knew this.

I mean, what can I say? I just really like big dicks. It's not just length, everybody's always talking length. It's fine, but...I mean, girth, too.

>It was ONLY good because of the two leads and the director

That's most of the driving influence right there though.

>once this CIA guy denied entrance to me and my friends at his party, Ray, but guess what!? That party was my plane and I was gonna crash it. With no survivors

I'm a survivor. We're a dying breed.

why does vince posting have to suffer brainlets who could never muster the intelligence to format their posts properly?

They say a community that pretends to be idiots for fun will always be joined by actual fools, well guess what Ray, im the fucking jester king

>im the fucking jester king
>not "I'm the fucking jester king and it's the Festival of Fools day, you know, Caspere and QUASIMODO KNEW THIS"
YOU HAD ONE FUCKING JOB!

>t. brainlet who ruined anons post
you just proved my point dumb dumb

They say life's one giant circle jerk, Ray. And I got two hands full of meat about to erupt.

Caspere knew this.

>they say a picture's worth a thousand words. well guess what, ray? i'm blind and they ain't painting in braille.

Ray--men are not prisoners of fate, but only prisoners of their own minds. So I turned my mind into an upscale resort.

season 2 was so fucking off I don't know.
I mostly blame the absence of fukushikos brilliance. writing was bad too but all the lead actors did a great job with what they had to work with.

pls stop ruining this meme none of you can do it right, just let it die

>tfw too dumb for vinceposting

There were also the plagiarism accusations. So s2 in a way feels a bit like "well, they don't like when I lift from other people, now I'm gonna dazzle them with OC".

But Pizza is a bit like Zack Snyder. They both try their best to be deep, but their idea of deep is actually pretty shallow

All my life I've been battling uphill, and when I finally got to the top did you know what I found Ray? Another fucking ladder.

lool

>can't vincepost himself, so he shits on everyone else
there's a few good ones

I watched it only once but it's odd that I can't really recall the plot. Don't even know how they wanted to make it deep or anything.

I can actually see this being used unironically in a good noir. If I heard it I would be like "damn that's deep"

They say an idle mind is the devil's playground. Well, he's gonna be real bored, 'cause I just tore down the fucking swing set, Ray. And the monkey bars are going next.

Kek, I like this one.

aww shit lol

Nice

Unironically kys

>My grandfather told me you can discover everything you need to know about everything by looking at your hands. I've been looking at mine all my life, every day since I was 5, and you know what I've just realized? They're fucking feet.

>they say you shouldn't count your chickens before they hatch. well guess what, ray? i got hungry for an omelet and had to break a few eggs.

they say the early bird gets the worm. Well Ray, i’m the egg and they’ve just thrown me in the butter

>They say you should always dress for the job you want, not for the job you have. Well I want nothing, Ray. Why else do you think I'm naked?

>clearly you want to be a professional birthday boy, ya fat pussy

ff f flawwwleesss post

...

This put me in a good mood

>season 1
>Forgotten by all but fedora clad Sup Forumsedditors
>Season 2
>Still resonating deep within the souls of high level television appreciators

I knew time would prove season 2 a misunderstood classic.

>Sup Forumsmblr
>talking shut about any other board
take the cock out of your ass and use your brain for once

>Board dedicated to anti-art trying to talk shit about a community formed around appreciating an art medium.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, Ray. I'm the road, and nobody crosses me.

>dgr goo
>gaeb of brones
>stern worbs
>sterg dreg
>spuddlemen hood gumming
>dividiny war
>dee see
>marble
>bagman v sdooderman
>art
the absolute state of current Sup Forums
this board has gone to shit and infested with underage and young dumb cross boarding Sup Forums scum

Never do anything out of hunger, not even eating.

That's all Sup Forums influence my friend.

then where are the faggots who cry about ethnic humor coming from?