Can someone give me examples of his worst dialogue?

Can someone give me examples of his worst dialogue?

I'm 90% sure this is unedited

bendin :D :D

I'm also going to post a 5 pages Bendis parody comic I very much enjoy, which showcases his biggest flaws.

Ladies an gentlem, I give you...

"Sitting"

...

...

...

The Bend

...

Bendis, the comic book writer?

Bendis, huh?

That cannot be real.

I think this page did something to my heart the first time I read it.

...

...

Ultimate Comics Spider-Man Vol. 2 #23

holy fuck

awesome facial hair bros
sad thing is normies actually want that

At least that one's just quippy and not a wall of text that only conveys a tiny sliver of information...

...

Oops. Thought this thread was just about the worst in general.

This was a pretty egregious recent example.

>deleted

Nobody fucking talks like that.

PREPOSTEROUS

It's like I'm reading a Metal Gear comic.

You don't say (sorry) either...

blah blah

This isn't even the worst page. This was when Bendis experimented with excessive thought balloons mixed with dialogue. You basically had double the bendispeak.

DOUBLE

and more blah

Do you have the Doom ones?
I swear, he must've been paid by the word those few months he did this.

YES!

That was the page I was trying to find.

Jesus christ! And to think he was writing his first run on New Avengers which was probably one of his two only good Avenger runs. The other being Dark Avengers.

Jesus fuck, that one is a fake. Has to be. Text on top of text, really? Its like if someone would film a movie by filming an opened book for 15 minutes at a time.

>that one is a fake

user...

It hurts the eye.

I can't believe Acuna wasted his time with this slop.

>Jesus fuck, that one is a fake.
No, that's Bendis for ya

Tried reading that. My eyes hurt.

Legit unreadable.

>when you're even worse than Kevin Smith

...

I'm starting to think Bendis is one of those fabled "comic book readers" who dont actually look at the pictures at all, only the speech bubbles. Jesus christ.

...

There, I found it.
This is not typical bendis, but it is bendis at his worse.

It's funnier if you think Doom is taking a very long awkward pause when the thought bubbles come in.

>No "You mean like an Egyptian Pharaoh?"

Did anyone ever call him out, like on his twitter, on his Bendis speak? How did he respond?

This. Dillon was aware of Frankface and actually ended up doing it on purpose. I hope we can make him realise Bendis speak is fucking everywhere in his work

He knows. He's had people call each other out in story on "just repeating what they said back to them".

>Speak?
>Yes, speak.
>Bendis speak?
>Yes, thats what I told you
>Bendis speak?
>Look at this page, this is an example of Bendis speak.
>this page?
>Yes, this page.
>Why this page?
>Because its an example of your bad writing. Please stop repeating what I said.
>(sorry), but Bendis speak?

This is the worst one

I assume that's why his books have so many recycling and zoomed in panels. He might not even give direction when scripting, and instead just let the artist be lazy if he does sincerely not give a shit about art

This. Bendis is a lazy egotistic hack.

jesus

Its like a chef writing "Fuck you, I don't give a shit about my job." on the hamburger you ordered from him.

This looks like screenshots of dialogue in a Fallout 1 walkthrough

Any time Bendis has to write an unironic old-fashioned villain he completely collapses in on himself.

Bendis-speak broke some of the traditional rules about how comic book dialogue should be written but now it's as old-fashioned as the dialogue it was rebelling against.

jesus?

Part of that is that he's giving the artist shortcuts so he can get the book out on time.

One reason he can get good artists for his books, probably, is they know he won't give them stuff that's impossible to draw on time.

I don't get the big deal. This is how dialogue works in Seinfeld and everyone loves that show.

>What's the deal with Bendis Speak?

Because you have to read Bendis speak, and it's tedious shit to read.

What works in one medium doesn't necessary work in another one.

You guys should actually read that book in the OP.

Bendis does put in as little effort in his writing as you think, he put copies of his own scripts, pitches, and outlines in it. They are rife with spelling errors, and his ideas as so simplistic it hurts. Almost like that one Family Guy sketch with Stephen King and the lamp.

The book is useful though because it gives a lot of insight into what editors look for, what artists prefer, and how to actually write a script. This is because (I am not making this up) roughly 70-80% of the thing is written by other people, individuals who are actually respected. And then the last chapter of the book is him REEEEEEing at tumblr and people at conventions who called him out on his shit.

YAMERO

>Saying "Legos"
Truly the worst of Bendis' sins.

That actually nice to hear. I saw that book at my local library and instantly laughed when I read the title.

Dialogue works in Mamet and Seinfeld stuff because things are moving along. In a comic it kind of kills the pacing because you're stuck in a few frames.

In a tv-show or a film, the actors and the flow make the dialogue work. In a comic, it clutters the page and feels awkward because you have to read it yourself.

You can write naturalistic smalltalk in a comic, but it takes effort and creativity. Giving each character a unique voice, adding little jokes and gags, creative panelling, etc. Bendis just slaps the dialogue on top of copypasted panels which makes everything lifeless, repetive and slow.

>And then the last chapter of the book is him REEEEEEing at tumblr and people at conventions who called him out on his shit.

Meanwhile, in the professional writers universe..

The letterer is surely not nearly paid enough for this bullshit.

...

At least with an artist like Cho you don'y get as bored reading Bendis speak because he draws different facial expressions, but if you have David Fucking Finch doing the art got a Bendis book, you want to kill yourself.

Look at his old stuff. Mainly that one Spawn spin-off book.

He's gotten a lot better since

>He's gotten a lot better since
I can't imagine a Bendis worse than 2010's Bendis.

>what the holy neonatal circumcision are you doing here?

>Try not to be insulting
Grow a thicker skin, asshole.

I don't think it always is shit - Sheriff of Babylon does the Mamet, Seinfeld, Bendis thing and it does it really well. Gerads + the nine panel grid are probably why it though.

There's no fucking way somebody looks at this and thinks "yeah, this looks good enough".
I want to believe they just skip the editor part and just print it.

What the fuck

The letterer deserves a raise for dealing with that bullshit

You won't get a dime for Ganke no matter how much you try, you bald fuck. He's Ned Leeds now so you get skwat.

Because its not one character speaking like this. When all of a sudden every character in a book starts speaking this bullshit its very jarring and noticeable

I don't read much Bendis, but what you've posted here is like a facsimile of Shane Carruth's abysmal dialogue. He's a director of some of the worst and most acclaimed new sci-fi movies (since hipsters own the digital rags that praise them).

Just watch Primer, it's as if Bendis wrote it.

Alright, where is that art from because that Mandarin design is badass.

jesus fucking christ

It's not Mandarin, I think it's Gladiator from the Old Man Logan timeline. So it's probably from Bendis' Old Man Logan.

Gladiator got his hands on the Mandarin's rings?

>Three "Janet" in the frist two balloons
>the J changes two times

I think he is