STAR WARS LAST JEDI REACTIONS

post em

>500 reviews saying it’s fantastic

>Sup Forums will nitpick the two negative ones claiming that they’re the only “woke” or “honest” reviews

Lmao how pathetic

Starting with best one

Who the fuck cares, where are the spoilers.

IT'S GONNA FLOP

It disgusts me that LITERAL r/starwars manchildren migrate to Sup Forums whenever a new star wars movie comes out.

where are the 500 reviews exactly?

SOMEONE SPOIL ME

...

It would be nice if all those fuckers would stop shaking and post spoilers.

NOT EVEN A BILLION

Up your ass retard

he just made that all up
here's a post based on facts though
>that guys sucks over five hundred cocks a day
>will pick the two minutes he's not stuffed with nigger dick to post sjw garbage on Sup Forums

>tfw as soon as the spoilers are out I'm going to PM them to every redditor on every SW subreddit I can find

Haha there's literally a thread like this already with the single non-jizz review as the opening post. So predictable the cherry picking

YASSSSS SLAY QUEEN

I'm literally shaking right now

oh look rebel win again lol

Hammil shits on new films, I trust the guy who is in "dont give a fuck and can speak truth" age, rather than hyped cucks or driver/ridley/boyyyyega who has to lick kennedy's ass.

I really hope that once he gets old enough to stop giving a single solitary fuck he'll he'll open up and completely trash every single thing about nuWars instead of toeing the line so Disney doesn't sue him.

Reposted from the previous thread

>Leia, Admiral Ackbar, Nien Nunb all die in the movie’s first battle sequence
>Kylo refuses to kill his mother during the attack on the bridge but reports to Snoke that he did after she is killed during the attack by a nameless Tie that Poe shoots down. He plans to find Luke and Rey to “deliver” her to Snoke and tells her that he wants to work with them to kill Snoke in a vision during her training
>Daveen “DJ” (Benicio Del Toro’s character) is one of Palpatine’s biological sons and Rey’s father
>Poe has known Daveen from a young age
>Rey convinces herself throughout her training that her father is Luke and when she finally confronts him about it the line “I am not your father but I can help you find the man you seek” is uttered
>Yoda appears to Rey as a Force Ghost during her training and tells her she has stronger ties to the force than she knows. She takes this as being part of the Skywalker family. It is heavily implied that she is somehow related to Obi Wan after the joint attack on Snoke’s ship
>A new force power, Force Phasing, is introduced. Close range teleportation (Looks really cool)
>Finn and Phasma takes place during the raid on Snoke’s ship. Rose kills Phasma by attaching her to an X-Wing using a magnetic rope thing. Finn and Rose get together
>Snoke is revealed to be creator of the Jedi Order and Luke vs Snoke happens while Kylo and Rey tag team the Knights of Ren
>
The movie ends with Luke, Rey, Kylo, Finn, Rose and the gang escaping Snoke's ship. Leia is dead 30 minutes in and Holdo (Laura Dern's character) takes over

...

Celebrities these days are so cucked that it's really refreshing when you can actually admire someone's honesty. Based Mark.

So what's the big twist?

Surely not that Snoke is the founder of the Jedi Order?

That sounds so terrible I might just see the movie anyway

This is my biggest pet peeve. Star Wars always has to go through the formula of the good guys over coming the odds and winning at the end.

Totally missed an amazing opportunity to either have the rebellion control the galaxy and have Sith lords take the opposite position or for gangs like the Hutt family or old Separtist forces to reclaim the galaxy as their own, unleashing old rivalries the Empire previously controlled.

I think Rey being a descendant of Palplatine's probably the bigger twist

>This is my biggest pet peeve. Star Wars always has to go through the formula of the good guys over coming the odds and winning at the end.
No, they just make them lose off-screen so they have another excuse for having rebels in every fucking movie.

Does Reylo is canon?

Look, look at it. Look at what they've done with your childhood.

A glib facsimile.

She isn't though. That's Benicio del Toro's character.

So what she is the daughter of Palpatine’s son and Obiwan’s daughter?
So they just magically had secret kids that never came up in the two previous trilogies?

That's the only thing I'm interested about.

Mark Hamill is a retarded liberal faggot. And a shitty actor to boot. The fact that he is so butthurt about how they are going about the movie has my spirits high.

>Daveen “DJ” (Benicio Del Toro’s character) is one of Palpatine’s biological sons and Rey’s father

>one of Palpatine’s biological sons and Rey’s father
Of fucking course

powerful

thank you jews

going from a couple of other tweets its a given it happened....or they could just be fangirls

Who is one of Palpatine's sons

It will always be canon to me.

Nigger read. It’s her grand pappy

Thanks user Sounds about as bad I thought. Luckily we 'll see more Finn and cross dressing bobby lee.

this guy

>is a retarded liberal faggot
Literally required to be a celeb these days. We are only rejoicing, that despite this, he still shits on the mouse.

where do I go to find spoilers.
not ever gonna watch the movie but I want to know what happens.

This was for infinity war but it will apply to TLJ too.

>Daveen “DJ” (Benicio Del Toro’s character) is one of Palpatine’s biological sons and Rey’s father
>Yoda appears to Rey as a Force Ghost during her training and tells her she has stronger ties to the force than she knows. She takes this as being part of the Skywalker family. It is heavily implied that she is somehow related to Obi Wan after the joint attack on Snoke’s ship
Wait what?

>>Daveen “DJ” (Benicio Del Toro’s character) is one of Palpatine’s biological sons and Rey’s father
REYLO IS HAPPENING CONFIRMED

Why is Palpatine's son a spic?

You're so cool!

seriously though, they couldn't find a prettier Asian woman? Or would Kathleen Kennedy feel too threatened of having someone other than her young doppelganger(s) look good?

My niggah getting bitches pregnant while looking like dis.

Leia gets blown out of her flagship and recovered by droids from the vaccum of space, and she's put in some healing chamber

Sidious is Chad confirmed.

cant wait for every piece of EU to have FORCE PHASE now, like they do with every other power.

Lmao what the fuck

Sheev would have had to have been like 70 when he had this kid

Sheev probably fucked a slave

Even John Booga looks good next to really. No really, dude looks like a gorilla, sure, but I can understand some of the appeal, but that asian chick is fucking hideous, like fucking disgusting, looks like a fat ugly frog, I really don't understand why the fuck they chose her, she shouldn't be in film, let alone acting, that's how ugly she looks. That's coming from a man with generally low standards and yellow fever, and even I wouldn't hit that, what the fuck, what were they thinking?

Worse is the plot holes it makes.

>why didn't Sheev force phase out of Vader's grip?

Force Viagra

Ah bloo bloo

>The Chad Sheev
>The Virgin Luke
Look who won now.

nobody wanted to kiss that nigger.

How is she so fucking ugly?

if your will to see it is strong enough

You see this
Chad confirmed

Sheev is younger than he looks.

Fake as fuck. The name DJ has already been spoiled and it aint Daveen

>seriously though, they couldn't find a prettier Asian woman?
Because "REEEEEEE PROUD AZN WOMEN ARE NOT YOUR CHINA DOLLS". Ugly asian women bitching about fetishization is like fat white women bitching about fat shaming.

fake

...

They did it, didn't they? They ruined Star Wars.

Remember that article last month about there being in this film a female resistance general having to deal with sexism from the other resistance leaders? I hope they include something about racism as well, might as well make the normies in the theatre say out loud "what the fuck, sexism and racism was never a thing between humans in the star wars universe before..."

Sheev was 88 when he died.

>"If you're in advertising, KILL YOURSELF!!!"

>Sheev is younger than he looks.
He was born 108 years before the events of TFA.

Obligatory

star wars has been shit since 1977 m8

somebody please tell me

That doesn't even make sense.

>The liberal actor hates it. So that means I can like the liberal movie pushing it's obnoxious progressive agenda just to spite him!!

Where are Disney finding you idiots?

1973 actually

not as powerful as Rey, it wasn't "having vagina in 2015-2017" type of power just a simple dark lord ...

Stronnk indepnddonantt wymwyn > sith lord

This is really making me mad. I see posters of these asians complaining about this crap everywhere on my uni now, as if the blacks, gays and feminists weren't enough. Like fuck off, it's like every group are competing to see who is more opressed.

>"Did you ever hear the tragedia of El Pleguioso de Diablo?"

...

It's really puzzling. Asians already have anime so they don't need to whine about representation. I know that they're technically Japanese but all Asians are practically the same so it seems like nitpicking.

>Where are Disney finding you idiots?
Outisde of Sup Forums with the rest of the normal people you sad little neckbeard.

japs are obviously superior(eventhough still asian)

the problem with asians is that nobody cares about them. they are mostly just left alone. i think they are attention starved desu

At least this "liberal faggot" have guts to say that profitable film =/= good film. We all know that, but no one speaks about that freely on TV or in interviews.

...

What did he mean by this?

The jew fears the samurai

Why is Yoda even there?

It means Rey will cook and eat Kylo ren

That Adam Driver is a hot as fuck.
I wish I was half as manly as Adam Driver

THESE ARE THINGS I KNOW

That's one huge faggot

i think this has been the dumbest theory to sprout up from TFA