God, can you even imagine?

God, can you even imagine?
What a fanciful and creative idea for a movie.

Damn haha I cant even fathom. My 10/10 model gf was on holiday last weekend and I had to jerk off aaargh it was 2 whole weeks without sex omg so shitty

>tfw went 27 days and couldn't handle the urges and rage.
>tfw I wanted to fight anyone who came up to me

that's right, soyboy. normal men don't masturbate to (((((hentai))))) or (((whatever))) daily. you see it's not healthy

In the film, the movie, the work, he isn't allowed to jack it either.

I'm 23, almost 24, and will die a virgin.

Just hire an escort if you want to lose it.

you're a sad faggot, stop making this thread

>cant even do nofap for 2 weeks

>tfw 11,046 days and 11,046 nights

>tfw 5 years

oops

Wasn't the premise that he also couldn't jerk off?

>about to fuck some old slut
>pull it out
>"thats it?"

never again

It's already been three months

What are your stats, little guy?

5

y i k e s

no cumming, not even in his dreams

Oh shit do you have black magic powers yet?

is that fucking poster real? he looking up those girls skirts with a huge implied boner

Long long ago before I lost my virginity and still put women on a pedestal, I asked this coworker chick over to my parents house to watch a movie. She was a solid 5.5, 6 with makeup, no tits, but fit from playing volleyball. If I knew then what I know now, she was raring to go and would've been easy to at least get a beej from. So I picked this movie. And we sat there and watched this dumb movie. And I made zero moves. Then toward the end, I asked her if I could hold her hand. So we did that, but nothing else. Then I drove her home. We never hung out outside of work again after that. #4 personal douchechill moment of all time.

>yikes poster

damnit you nigs, pick the ball

>I haven't made it more than a week in the last two decades before the dick fully overtook the mind

Imagine inviting a girl over to watch Von Trier's nymphomaniac.

Nothing gets a pussy wetter than a movie about sexual abuse of kids, prostitution, emotional isolation, and mental illness.

I was so fucking dumb

How do they come up with such bizarre fantasies?

>And I made zero moves
How do you transition from watching a movie to fucking? I never understood this.

t. virgin

>not jack it for 40 days

ha

I went 18 years without it

how is that possbile?

christianity

you dont

You sneak in moves. Start by cuddling then at some point start moving your hands over her body and grabbing her ass. Then a little bit later you start kissing. If you're smooth they'll accept it and reciprocate. Then you just take control and start declothing her


Obviously only put on a movie you don't mind not paying attention to. I remember fucking with Toy Story on

what if they don't accept it

you'll finally be famous

hope the neighbors can't hear her screams

Obviously stop

I'm glad we've finally moved past that era of unrealistic filmmaking.

Why would a girl be willing to watch a movie at your place and not want to fuck? Everyone knows what it means.

God, can you even imagine? Lol what an outlandish premise.