Reddit Revolt on Star Wars spoilers

Time to boycott

What's he even bitching about?

the redlettermedia "spoilers" weren't true, holy shit it was clearly a joke.

also:
>going on reddit unironically

I'M SORRY GEORGE

>ReyRando
???

>Luke dies
>Luke tried to kill of a young Kylo

Basically ruined legacy

rando calrissian, Lando's son.

>Reddit turning on their disney masters
Never thought I'd see the day.

fuck off you redditnigger

Is he constantly randy?

Read the real spoilers

It was Kylos saber that lite first.

Luke was just defending himsef

Who is ReyRando?

Rey is random not a Skywalker or anything

I think it means rey random? The leaks said she is no one special, just born from junkies. Thus reinforcing her mary sue title since people were trying to claim she had training or was a skywalker/kenobi. That's my take away at least.

They're having a shitfit because not every character in the series is either a Skywalker or a Solo?

F A K E O U T
A
K
E
O
U
T

I didn't know star wars was so fickle that one nobody on reddit could kill it with four sentences.

If they didn't at least kill one main character you fags would complain that nothing even happened in the movie

muh stock

muh rich children need too be richer

Where the mouse force:1 at?

What's wrong with Jar Jar Binks???

I wonder why it took them so long. I knew the sequels were shit as soon as I read the TFA script.

George Lucas didn't even show up for the premiere in LA although I think he lives in California.
kek

No Sup Forums for the most part just wanted to luke to be a badass and didn't like that han died. Nice alternative theory that can't be proven though shill.

Are you still in denial over luke trying to kill his sleeping nephew?

A lot of fans fall into the trap of X is good because in the future they are gonna do something with it. People love thinking everything i full of hidden details. When their fanfic comes crumbling down they are left with nothing

>we
>our
>us
Why do they talk like that about a fictional piece of consumerism?

>it will be fi-

The EU is canon. The EU is True. Proclaim that which is True, for the EU is real.

Can't wait for the webms of this

A nigger and female lead with high probability of BLACKED was enough back then.

>Han shot first
>kylo's saber lit first.

It's all happening again.

>I... it looks kind of ch... cheesy, but it d... didn't bother me haha
>[chokes back tears of unfathomable disappointment]

OHNONONO *wheeze*

The only reason they swallowed that Rey could do all that Force stuff without training was that she had some special lineage.

But we are reddit!

Can't you guys just wait 2 more days before complaining?

Nigger it's over. The EU won. True fans are on the right side of history.

Today will be a day long remembered. It has seen the death of Ep 8, and will soon see the end of the Disneyverse..

ford wasn't going to be in tfa if they didn't agree to kill him off
wouldn't surprise me if hamill has the same deal in place

If you can't handle it then fuck off. Stay in twitter if you want a hyped circlejerk.

The Chinese don't care if Luke dies.
Women and niggers don't care if Luke dies.
Faggots and the mentally ill don't care if Luke dies.
Gen Z babies don't care if Luke dies.

This is just full on denial, kylo was sleeping he only takes his saber after waking up. I can't wait for the special edition where kylo is sleeping with his lightsaber lit

His Japanese son.

Exactly that's what I've been saying the whole time. Disney does not want the old Star Wars fans. They are a hinderace to their plans. They are hoping to build a new fan base of sjw alliance.

As bad as TLJ might be it was built on the shoddy foundation TFA laid.
They should've been up in arms two years ago.

>this is the movie that twitter shills claimed would change the saga forever
>this is what "critics" are claiming to be better than empire
JUST

We can make reddit bring down the kikes... hehehe

Shill accounts activate

>Luke was just defending himsef

I DIDN'T WANT IT TO BE LIKE THIS!

Fuck off we can make the normies bring down the kikes if we play this right

Disney has broken Reddit. Bravo.

>Why isn't star wars delving into politics! muh expanded universe!
lol reddit

Actually I would argue all but the chinese one are false. Disney is really underestimating how many fans Luke still has. It's not just people who watched ANH in cinemas (of whom there are still plenty). I'll be thirty next year, and I grew up with Luke too, before the PT was out.

If they really do kill off Luke, and he is really dead Obi-Wan style, then they will lose a LOT of fans, especially if they have him act questionably in the movie.

I can practically hear the reshoots that have Luke asspull something to come back in IX as something other than a force ghost. I can see them going with him achieving a level of 'oneness' that he doesn't just become blue and glowey, but is basically still 'alive' within the force.

On the upside, it sounds like Kylo is amazing, and all this shit just makes me feel vindicated in considering everything post-Disney as really expensive fanfiction.

The ending

The last scene is a (black) boy who’s a stable worker on Canto Bright. The alien boss (who we know is abusive from Finn and Rose’s mission) comes in to berate him. The boy goes outside and grabs a broom - except he calls it with the Force.

He looks at the ring Rose gave him - it has the rebellion logo. Then he looks up at the night sky, holding the broom a bit like a sword, and it irises out.

Well obviously they can't go that route, that would imply humans can be superior based on their genetics... When as we know, we are all equal and only extenuating circumstances go to making us different.

So they plan to tank the franchise then? Star Wars isn't and never has been a niche fandom. It's fucking Star Wars. Old SW fans and normies are intermingled to the point of being basically the same thing. Shitting on them basically means going from a multi-billion dollar a movie franchise to capeshit numbers over he next decade. It might take most a few more movies to lose interest, I plan to watch until they kill Kylo, but once the OT cast are all gone (now, basically) a lot more people than they expect will start to drift away.

Perhaps they consider the positive influence SW had on white boys would be worth any price to kill.

Its a perfect opportunity and can ride off the Battlefront scandal

Pump noxious gas into all Las Jedi screenings.

Gonna be posted for yeeeears to come

They don't care about him as a character, but they understand he is something they are meant to clap at cause people know that. They will be confused and fake anger cause they get je is meant to be special

How are these leaks coming out, why have so many people seen the film already?

oh my gd this is real

Animals can't sacrifice, only men.
Sometimes you need to cut off the part to save the body

During the Jedi training scenes on achto about 30 minutes in:
Luke: "so I see you've made some new friends Rey"
It shows Rey with a couple porgs and a goofy smile.
Rey: I felt them call to me through the force
Luke: it's true. The porgs are pure beings of the force, that's why I came to this place. The porgs tender meat holds the key to a power only Jedi masters can harness.

He grabs a porg from Rey and bites it's neck, blood sprays into his mouth and he gets a wild look in his eyes.

Luke: yes, the power! I can feel the force growing inside me, and inside my pants the force is growing!

The bulge is massive and throbbing. Rey wastes no time derobing, showing Luke the wetness dripping down her legs and mixing on the floor of the hut with porg blood.

Rey: now show me the power of a Jedi master, as we partake in the ancient ritual of the porg blood orgy!

Luke: hey r2, help me out with this sluts loose poon, will ya?
R2d2: beep boop (a flap opens up and a pulsating dildo emerges from r2.

A familiar voice emerges from the force, it's han "great job kid now let's blow this thing and go home"

Luke: aaaaaaahhhhh the pleasure! I'm blasting your inner wet walls with my jaws juice!

Rey: thank you, my master. The ritual is complete. Now I am the Almighty Mary sue! All white males must commit suicide in my honor!

Luke: as you wish, my vaginal god

Luke ignites his green saber and slices off his dick and balls and then stabs himself in the chest.

...

The way the story is designed is, the old movies are used as a template, then marketing tells them what characters toys are selling/who has the social media interest, this fuels the next movie, the most popular character who isn't a big money spinner is killed to create buzz for the new film.

There is no cohesive plot written before S1, no direction, the reaction to each film decides how the next goes.

There are a white stable boy and girl as well, but of course the black one had to be the focus

Please let this be real.

Bruh

Underrated post

oh no no no oh huuh huh uh hahahahaahhaahhhahaahahhahahaahhahahahahahahahahaha

Laser blasters are uncivilized, but using a light-saber as a javelin is different somehow?

>our nigga Ackbar going out like a bitch

Should've panned The Farce Awakens. Nobody panned it. This is the future you chose.

WTF!? HAHAHAHA

>I have nothing against these 3 shitty characters taking over.
Fucking Reddiot.

AAAAAAAHAHAHAHA LOOK AT THE TOP OF HIS- AAAAHAHAHAHA

OH NO NON NON AHAHASHHLHA

Chinese, as far as I know, fucking hated nuWars, so they may actually care.

>ackbar dying
D R O P P E D

>fish man dies
>a completely tasteless death on a real dead actress

classic disney

Horrible post but this got me, 3/10.

>A familiar voice emerges from the force, it's han "great job kid now let's blow this thing and go home"

They’re annoyed that the main character in the film series devoted exclusively to the Skywalker family isn’t a Skywalker? Gee, who’d have thought?

Idiot.

Sup Forums just wants to hate it so badly that they'll accept anything posted about it as hard fact.

>TFA was a piece of fan service that played it too safe!
>TLJ took too many risks! Why didn't they give me fan service where Luke had a 30 min lightsaber fight even though I bitched when Yoda had a lightsaber?! RREEEEEE!

Does anyone hate Star Wars more than Star Wars Fanboys?

luas wanted it to be a sci fi adventure also drawing from soap operas of the 70s but disney do not.

>Georges Lucas slamming the movie
>Ultimate PR crap
As if anyone cares about Georges' opinion about anything.

The Chinks don't care about Soy Wars full stop there own movies out gross it

Are you legitimately retarded?

Someone needs to post Ackbars head on Kevin Costner when does the whole 'Stop my super son' scene

umm sweetie what about infinity war though?

>like father like son
The Skywalker's are into child murder.
Legacy upheld

the time to boycott was the moment when they announced making this garbage all those years ago. You deserve this, retard

Why are people incapable of losing old characters? This is why media is shit

>Ghost Yoda is around
>Ghost Obi-Wan is around
>Ghost Anakin is around
Why the fuck didn't any of them try to stop Luke from trying to kill Ben? All of them are well-aware of the dangers of accepting Force Prophecies as fact and acting to stop them.

wtf I like The Last Jedi now

this. fuck drumpf and fuck white people

What you’re saying is partly correct, but the Luke/Yoda comparison is way off base. There is a precedent for Luke using a lightsaber and Yodas flipping around shit was horrible

>there are like 6 more star wars movies in production RIGHT NOW

But there were politics in the prequels and people hated those so therefore a good Star Wars movie must have zero politics

Disney's catering to the sub-90 IQ amerimutt crowd that doesn't ask these sorts of questions