IT'S REAL

ALL OF IT

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...

>mhh Monster milkies

OH NO NO NO NO NO NO

Do you think he fucks them

This is done intentionally to tarnish Luke's character. The destruction of the heroic white male, we're going deeper into the shadow

OHHHHHNOOOONONONONO AHAHAHAHAHA

YUMMY MILKIES

10 memes that became way too real | 720 | 539919027 views

they fuck him

...

Luke forgave his father for being a space nazi, now the jews let him suffer. The hero of millions of childhoods for the last 40 years reduced to being a smelly hobo hooked on monster milk.

>Kyle Katarn isnt Canon
>this shit is

Kill me

It's crazy that a scene of Luke milking green milk out of a fat CGI alien cow is the most Star Wars scene in the entire movie. Seriously, this is some real prequel-tier shit.

Similar to pic related, milking the viewer than forcing Hamil to smugly stare down the loyal fan

As if the incestual relationship with Leah during the original series hadn't done that already

I'm actually quite surprised that milking giant animal nipples is part of a Star Wars film.

NOOOO DELET THIS

I can't wrap my head around how the spoilers ended up looking exactly as dumb as they were described. Usually there's a leeway of "well it sounds worse than it looks" but this time the spoilers look just as dumb as they sound. Not even a little wiggle room.

ITS HABBENING

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
LOOK AT THE TOP OF HIS HEAD
AAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Remember when this was supposed to be the force sloth Anakin?

He's drinking milk, what's the big deal? It's not like he breastfed from the monster thing.

It's worse than the prequels and I hated them before Kevin Smith made it cool to hate them.

Does Disney have to pay royalties for luke toys?
Only reason I can think of why they completely destroy his character that way.

spoilers may have even been generous imo, some of them made it sound at least like a lazy winter flick

looks like it was poorly put together self-insert fan film with access to ILM props

I'm sorry, Geoge.

Didn't mind that, it's a cute little scene that shows Luke still has enough humour to fuck with Rey and shows him interacting with creatures on the island. It's just milk, who gives a shit.

Sloths are vaguely humanlike.

It looks like a mean spirited parody by someone who really hates star wars

I love this.

I like it when directors lose all respect for the target audience of the movie he's working on. It's.. existential if I may say

Holy. Fucking. Shit.

>It's worse than the prequels and I hated them before Kevin Smith made it cool to hate them.
Doesn't the fat fuck suck the dick of the prequels all the time?

t. Rian

no kids going to want a toy of a literal semen slurping 70 year old virgin that dies like a bitch

i just got to this part on the periscope cam rip, holy fucking shit i can't stop laughing and had to pause the video, jesus christ what were they thinking

HAHAHAHAHA!
HOLY SHIT
WHERE IS YOUR GOD NOW, STARWARS FAGS

>Oh hey new comer, get over here you have milk too right?

I remember when people were saying all the predictions were bullshit made up by anons and repeated as memes.
I bet they feel stupid now.

raunchy litty flick

I miss Jar Jar. He was simple, and fun. He stepped in a poopie and got himself zapped.
Can we have these simple times back?

Well for a start its raw and unpasteurized, that's very unhygienic

do you guys not drink milk? if it were 1930s switzerland would you be some weirdo who didn't want sweet godly milk from Bessie the cow

WE'RE NOT GOING THERE TO FISH

it's true...all of it

Clerks animated had George Lucas being sued for the phantom menace being shit and poorly written.

I want to cry guys... why did I pay money to be in pain...

>It's afraid!

>tfw no Jedi Master the Rock
I'd watch the shit out of that. I'd buy tickets for everyone

>he actually milks the sloth on film
>he actually has green milk in his beard
>flying Fisher was real
>ghost yoda burned a jedi tree
It's true. All of it.

MILKY MILKY WARM AND TASTY!

MOMMY! MILKY! PLEASE BE HASTY!

REFRESHING DRINK FROM MOMMY'S UDDERS!

I WANT MOMMY'S AND NO OTHER'S!

GIVE IT! GIVE IT! GIVE IT NOW!

GIVE ME MILKY, LAZY SOW!

UNTIL YOU DO I'LL SCREAM I'LL SHOUT!

I'M CRY I'LL WHINE AND STOMP ABOUT!

UNTIL MY BELLY IS FULL AND HAPPY!

I REFUSE TO TAKE A NAPPY!

Why did they get Mark Hamill back in shape just to appear in one movie and then die in the worst possible way?

In fact, why DID Luke die at the end? Did using the Force seriously kill him?

This is so stupid.

>"I want to learn the ways of the force and become a jedi like my father"
>cut the milking scene 40 years later

>if it were 1930s
If it were the 30s people like jj would wear striped payamas.

He died of a broken heart. It's like pottery, it rhymes

I don't know how this shitty website works but here is a link to a poll to rate the film.

docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSe17c6GzHNSqgfYWouVg2IlDkc8gnrKJZjQL-EHXlytNZo6_A/viewform?usp=sf_link

Now fuck off I wanna suck those four land-sea-horse ballsack breasts.

>raunchy titty flick

FTFY

It's green milk from a giant flabby disgusting monster's udders that happen to be right where it's groin is

Why couldn't these movies just be good?
Why did they have to include all this stupid shit?

jej

where's the picture of the book?

1. milk is bad for you
2. it isnt kosher
3. theres going to be a lego toy version of this abomination.

What was actually spoiled before release?

He died because he chose to die, like Obi-Wan.

>why DID Luke die at the end? Did using the Force seriously kill him?

>If you strike me down now I will become more powerful than you imagine.
>If you strike me in anger I will be with you for the rest of your life
He's going to force ghost the next one.

This is like the prequels all over again.

Ooohhh, Anooon.. milk?

It JUST keeps getting worse

my sides are killing me

Link?

He died because his character was assassinated.

Best post in all these shitty threads thank you user made me laugh again.

Maybe he used force pasteurise

Yes. And people thought it was made up or at least exaggerated because it sounded so far out.
I'm in shock that it ended up looking exactly as I pictured it.

Boo-hoo, the best milk I've ever had (not exaggerating either) was warm goats milk
Fresh from the goat, the guy milked it into a container, put it into a bag with a straw and.. it was delicious

He fucked this thing too, didn't he?

...

And yet Luke still remains the only memorable and likeable character.

is the milk rich in midichlorians?

>looks like it was poorly put together self-insert fan film with access to ILM props
Well that's pretty much what TFA was, so it's not surprising.

luke is clearly a bottom, he probably took it from the sloth to speed up milking

>I want there to be a giant turkery with huge tits in this film. And I want Luke Skywalker to drink colored milk from them

This is a conversation that someone unironically had when making this movie.

>liking goats milk
>expecting people to take you seriously

Well that's stupid.

That's even worse. Also, if Yoda's ghost force can set things in the real world on fire then what the fuck is the point of having a character die if they can just come back to life and interact with everyone the way they used to when they were alive?

Kylo attacked his hologram thing, not the actual Luke though.

>Kylo attacked his hologram thing, not the actual Luke though.

Go look up what a character assassination is you utter twat.

It's ok Abdul. Yet your personal lack of hygiene and enjoyment of goat udders and pussy is besides the point here.
I'm sure luke also jacks off to sloth tits and takes steamy green shits from his monster milk diet, the point is that this kind of stuff was put on screen to make him look disgusting and pathetic.

>this is the man I grew up idolizing

if it was just a hologram then why did he dodge his first attack? the meditating luke was the hologram and the real luke got killed.

JESUS FUCKING CHRIST

>is an asshole from start to finish
>tried to murder his sister and best friend's son
>doesn't even bother to go help the rebels in person

You only like him because of the OT. If this was a stand alone movie you'd hate him.

Dear god.

I wonder how Mark feels about all of this.
I truly want to know.

>It's ok Abdul.

You could've at least went with Juan, get your racism straight Cletus

>then why did he dodge his first attack?
To distract kylo obviously.

Because he didn't want Kylo to know he was being rused

How dumb are you? He was trying to save some time so his friends could escape. Then he ascended.

>Iberians
Qed jajajaja

>you'd hate Luke Skywalker if he had been written nothing like Luke Skywalker

Yeah no shit, why do you people are so pissed at the way he is written in this film you mong?

MOMMY

To gain some precious 20 seconds before letting him slice through the hologram anyway. People will defend this btw

MILKIES FROM MY SLOTH MOMMY
MMM MMMMM
THEY FEEL YUMMY IN MY TUMMY