/porg/ general - Porg talk

Personally, I thought the porgs didn't get enough screen time. When they were on screen they stole the show of course.

How many months till they announce a Porg movie ala Minions?

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Whenever a Porg is off screen, the main character should be asking, "Where's Porg?"

Episode 9 is going to be just that. Basically the camera and mic are focused on cavorting porgs as actual Star Wars stuff just happens in the background. You'll get a dramatic saber battle between Rey and Kylo Ren fuzzy and out of focus in the background while a fucking porglet is doing something retarded in the foreground.

Can't wait for all the toys to come out so I can spend all my christmas money on it.
SOOOO CUTTTTE :3~~~~~~.

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Will your buy an official porg buttplug??? Answer me right fucking now

>Episode 9 is going to be just that.
Nah, it'll be a Rogue One type stand alone movie.

Disney won't license those. So no.

Lost

The porgs contributed literally nothing to the story. If you took them out, not a single scene would change at all except for like 20 seconds of Chewbacca eating.

I wanna fuck em.

Trust me. Disney WANTS to hammer the fucking nails into Star Wars' coffin so bad that they'd do dumb shit like that. It is unknown why they would slam dunk a high value IP directly into the trash can like this, but the Mouse works in mysterious ways.

I said "official" for a reason.

Haha cute xD so random

chewbacca should have eaten that porg

I want to fuck that porg
Signed, a porg enthusiast

there's no way around it

lol it makes me tink of the minions from duspiceble me 2 :)

>Producers: Let's add something stupid but cute to cater to women and anime fans, ez $$ confirmed

Star Wars has been merchandised to death. What else were they going to make into stuffed animals and funko pops and tshirts and coffee mugs and limited edition paper towels and hoodies and funko pops and soup with fun shapes in it and cereal with fun shapes in it and funko pops and pillows and shot glasses and keychains and backpacks and socks and beach towels and cufflinks and coin purses and earrings and also funko pops?

You need to see the bigger picture here. If porgs weren't in the movie nerds wouldn't have anything else to spend money on and tell people that they were infact "geeks" who saw star wars and also liked it just like everybody else.

To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand porgs. The humour is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of lovable merchandising most of the jokes will go over a typical viewer’s head. There’s also porg’s optimistic outlook, which is deftly woven into their characterisation- their personal philosophy draws heavily from Minions literature, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of these jokes, to realise that they’re not just funny- they say something deep about LIFE. As a consequence people who dislike porgs truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn’t appreciate, for instance, the humour in porg’s existential catchphrase “BRA-KAW BRA-KAW” which itself is a cryptic reference to Despicable Me’s epic Gru. I’m smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as Rian Johnson’s genius wit unfolds itself on their cinema screens. What fools.. how I pity them.

And yes, by the way, i DO have a porg tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. It’s for the ladies’ eyes only- and even then they have to demonstrate that they’re within 5 IQ points of my own (preferably lower) beforehand. Nothin personnel kid

they were comic relief, gave chewy screentime and someone/thing to actually interact with, and will get the female audience buying merchandise
they added nothing to the story, but this is a childrens film and children (and females) like cute things and cute toys
its a fucking kids movie. its embarrassing watching anons try to dissect it like its gone with the wind

i defy anyone to tell me that the chewy eating scene wasnt adorable as all fuck

their out of control breeding will cause an ecological crisis in Episode IX.

Will we get to see hot porg-on-porg action and egg laying zoomed into the cloaca?

Genuinely interested in that film. Are there any good movies about invasive species?

i want disney to sell porg flavored hot dogs. i wud devour those